The Official Blazer Forum Off Topic Thread

Thanks for the link Blazee, I've added it to another Canadan forum.

I h8 people like that theif and feel that it makes us Canadians look bad to some people.

Today is the worst day of my life.

Today is the worst day of my life.

Care to elaborate?

Nevermind I see it. That sucks man.

Yes i was going to say that.
I wanna cry. She was my true love and never talked back to me just took it like only a GM can. I am now in process of getting numbers for banks, jyds far away cuz i can not see it when im parting out other trucks, and tanks.

Guys how can i get apple itunes to install when i get this installer error? I have done everything i can find on the error from clearing cookies, closing all windows, system defrag, clearing temp files and cache, system registry cleaner and what not.

blazerman, how bad is it? There's a small chance that I might have several of the parts required for a reserection. (if you care too)

Sorry I don't know much about I-tunes, I know someone that might though if you can't figure it out

blazeman, done all that in safe mode yet?

No not safe mode. just regular old mode. i was kinda frustrated/sad at the time hard to do computer tasks when your fighting back tears. anywho right now im trying to use musicmatch and windows media player for this task.

bank actually might be able to give me a loan. they said im probally going to need to have a truck in mind so they can use that as collateral as i dont got co signor. I did find one that met their requirements 96 jimmy 4.3 4door 4x4 54k miles. i dont know though i might go married w children on the blazer and bury it in my yard.

Okay I have a question if anyone can help, I just got a chevy blazer ls michael jordan edition and i have had it for a total of 1 week and well,,, i have drove it for a total of about 24 hours. the car has been back to the dealership 3 times now for the transmission and the computer in the car what should i do, keep letting them fix it under warranty or trade in for a new one? The reason that i am confused is because I have leinhoder on the car and will they not let me change it?

they had a mj edition?

nica, if you'd bought it from me I would pretty much insist that my employer fixxed it properly (1 more chance only) or let me exchange it for the vehicle of your choice of equal (or a little more) value.

Try talking to the sales person that you bought it from hoping that he's also ethical.

I'm new in the car sales industry, but that's what I would do if you were my customer.

If we see someone sugesting something dangerour on the forums should we report it to you Blazee, Brian, and ShortBus or just point out the hazards involved?

If we see someone sugesting something dangerour on the forums should we report it to you Blazee, Brian, and ShortBus or just point out the hazards involved?
If someone posts something that you feel is dangerous, go ahead and respond (nicely) to explain why you feel the way you do. It would be nice if you'd send a link to a mod to give us a heads up. More than likely the suggestion won't be removed, though. We don't dictate what advice can and can't be posted, we just try to make sure that people get the info they need to make an informed decision. Having the questionable advice posted, as well as the possible hazards is actually better for the forum, because it shows people the hazards that they may not have considered, if they were to think of the idea on their own.

when is your avatar changing? Its been like that for about 8 months.

With these newer trucks lol are they more prone to lets say setting off airbags and what not. that is one of my concerns if i have to go that way. Occasionally something will bump the front end and i know that the sensors are in the bumper lol. This one im looking at has more buttons and switches than my old one ever had lol. I think it has one for every function.
Fog lights, rear wiper, rear defogger. Tach in the cluster, overhead console. Lol too high class.

Thanks Blazee, I've responded to the 1 post that I was a little concerned with nicely.

I'll pm you the link, allowing you to make the judgement call, although you've probably seen it already.

If we see someone sugesting something dangerour on the forums should we report it to you Blazee, Brian, and ShortBus or just point out the hazards involved?

What Blazee said. Also, a mod (or someone else) should back up the correct warning for emphasis so that no one has any doubt about the posted correction.

Normally, when someone gives really bad advice or a really inaccurate procedure, I will PM them and ask them "Are you sure you want to post that???" and clarify why.

Thanks Brian, I just PM'd the link to Blazee with a little note of what I didn't like.

I just don't want to see anyone do something dangerous sugested on this board, and get hurt or worst.

Taken care of

they had a mj edition?

Yes the blazer is a mj edition. Does anyone know anything about mj editions? I have to go talk with them at 9 this morning, any suggestions??:screwy:

they have another blazer there it is the same year, dif color, not an mj edition, has 97,000 miles what would you do? My blazer has 87,000 miles but too many problems, I feel like i bought the car for nothing because i can't even drive it!!

nica, i don't know where you live, but check the "Lemon Laws" if its been into service more than X times..... they have to replace defective part.

Special editions really don't mean as much as reliability. Your call but I'd tell them that I'm giving them 1 more chance to fix it right, or they can either trade it with another vehicle or give you your money back (including taxxes) if it was mine.

Nica lives in Illinois if anyone knows about their lemon laws (it's on your public profile Nica)

Nica - you might want to check out www.yourlemonlawrights.com , they advertise through AF, not that that is an endorsement. It probably doesn't hurt to look into it, and if nothing else they may have a source of legal help in your area. You should seriously consider talking to a lwyer, Illinois does have a Lemon Law on the books, so you should be covered.

What did the edition consist of?

being 18, having to goto a bank sucks so bad. Also spending 25 percent of your time looking at trucks i guess in a way is good. right now im torn between a 96 95 or a clean first gen. I have saw a few with no rust around here the past few days.


I have work 7Am lol and then at 1215 i go to where truck is stored at moment and tear that thing apart. When she rolls into the JYD off the flatbed there wont be more than 10 things they can sell out of it left on it.

At approximately 1600hours Saturday the 25 of February in the year 2006 of our Lord there will be an eulogy followed by taps, followed by a moment of silence, followed by a 4 gun salute. Then the casings will be placed in strategic places through out the old girls wonderful volumptous interior. The 4 gun salute will consist of one pardner 12 gauge youth model shotgun, one 12 gauge H&R shotgun, one Mossberg 500 Pump Action Shotgun, and one Savage 22LR model 64 rifle. Black attire is requested and all mourners if they care to speak will have an opportunity to do so.


In mourning, Shawn

Shawn, if you're going through the bank or credit union you can usually tell them what your looking for, otpions, what you're willing to pay, and they'll usually find something you want, and THEY haggle over the price.

Thats kinda what they told me.They told me if i know what im going to spend or in the range they will more than likely use that as collateral. Ill be asking some stupid ?s the next few weeks about these newer trucks lol cuz there not my specialty.

Well good luck.

Ok looking at this 95 4dr 149331 miles. Two tone. Every option available to man lol including security system lol. He is asking 2995 i wanna take it for a ride cuz i can lol.

^
not too bad, milage is about right for that year. I guess you haven't seen the condition of it yet. let us know.

The only thing i have been sent so far are 3 pics. The body looks like it was repainted. As its black but the front bumper to the rear bumper if you would follow the trim panel where it would say blazer has been tealed. Let me post it up.

http://x402.putfile.com/2/5516165876.jpg (http://www.putfile.com)

http://x402.putfile.com/2/5516173890.jpg (http://www.putfile.com)

http://x402.putfile.com/2/5516181943.jpg (http://www.putfile.com)


The only thing was he told me there was a tach and i dont see one in them pictures.Other than that it has power windows,locks, rear wiper, power seats, cassette player<i dont care i got 300 worth of equipment to put in>,power mirrors, keyless entry, alarm, compass, trip clock, etc.


To you guys this is probally like yeh this is in my truck now but for me its like going from stone age to now in a time machine. I dont know what to do with all them their buttons.

looks decent. I like the 2-tone colors.

Interesting colors. Not my taste but they definitaly stand out.

Personally I like the colors. Nice looking Blazer

Does anyone know of any Mischeif forums?
Or have any ideas.

I need some tips to slow down an illegal demolision crew from destroying a Quanset Hut building.

Here's the news story
http://www.chbc.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=12482

It's my mom's building, and the village obtained an illegal court order (not even signed by a Judge and several months old) and started ripping it apart yesterday.

Oddly enough when they showed up today they discovered my Blazer, with Trailer blocking 1 wall and my motorhome almost blocking the other open wall.

That's not mentioning the fact that about 10% of the bolts were welded.

They managed to get 12 of the un-welded bolts off in 3 hours. This is a crew of 3. They aren't suposed to damage anything although they have destroyed the 1 end wall. (It took them 1 full day of swearing to do it)

That's the family emergancy that I mentioned a few days ago.

We are getting a court order against them ASAP, but might not be able to until mid week.

I'll keep you guys all updated, and probably have a big story in a few days

Thats crazy man. I can picture your truck and motorhome blocking it.


Im going to email the guy again, i want to know about rear end gearing among other things. I won't be able to get up to Friday to test her out with work and school so i want to know as much as i can before.

That paint is what jumped out at me. I was like thats pretty neat.

Ok i forgot to say lol tomorrow the passenger seat from my truck is going in a 92 cavalier. What i hope to do is get the cavy seat out unbolt the brackets see where they are on the blazer seat and drill holes and go from their. One problem i see is that the cavy has no seat belt warning light but thats not really an issue.

My Blazer is rather filthy, but here's the pic's
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01314.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01315.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01317.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01319.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01320.JPG

I took mini movies of the motorhome, and with dial up at my mom's won't even try to upload them, but I'll try taking pic's tomorrow, along with the welded bolts.

I've got several out of town appointments in the next few days so if they somehow get a court order for me to move them I won't be able to :headshake

Oh 1 good thing about the Psi Lok is that 4wd is engaged even when my Blazer isn't running making it even harder to move

blazerman I've got 4.10 gears for that if you want, but I don't think that the front diff would work on anything that new.

I'll be moving my motorhome over later more today. I parked it here the other day after dark and alone. I'll have someone guide me this time, plus I'll park 1 of my rods between the open space and the motorhome and chain them together this time.
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01331.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01332.JPG


Does this look like these bolts are welded?
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01333.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01334.JPG
I still don't know how that happened

I've decided to follow the villages own bylaws, except in my mom's favor.
If they decide to get a court order ordring me to move my vehicles I will.

Except I'm given 30 days to move them and that's after a Sherrif gives me the court orders and takes the time to explain them to me. 30 days should be lots for us to file the papers required.

In the mean time it's my responsibilty to ensure that they leave the building safe when they leave, which in my opinion includes replacing any missing bolts, and stacking piles of boards over any nails that they happen to leave sticking up
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01329.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01330.JPG

I will of cours notify the Workmans Compensation Board before I cover up any boards with nails sticking up, so they can do their job. That's only right isn't it?

Plus it's my honest opinion that those bolts came off too easily so I'll be buying a bottle of permant locktight and several boxxes of nuts.
I would like to dubble nut everything with the locktight eventually.
Then there is no way that they'll come out in 15 min with 3 people working at it like those 12 bolts did.




I would like to appologise to anyone that was hoping on my input for any threads, and those of you that have me on their messanger.
I've been pretty busy with this mater the last several weeks and just haven't even felt like being on the computer much more than nessary.

I still check my e-mail so if you have to reach me just drop me a PM

Best of luck to you Stu. What's their business with someone else's property?

Thats how i pictured it would look.

Im with mike on that ?

I got the passenger seat into the cavalier.So easy to do. Just take brackets off both seats and swap the cavaliers onto the blazer buckets. Then the tricky part was that the blazer side piece that joins the two seats has this wire cable going from it to the track, once that was off i was golden. They sit like 2" higher but the firmness in it is insane.



I don't get email notification from this thread no more lol. Its like checked to send it to me automatically but i dont get it.

Well I bought a bottle of permant lock tight, and a box of nuts plus about 50 more nuts from around the house and had some fun.
Plus I moved the motorhome
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01340.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01341.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01342.JPG
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01344.JPG

I also hooked a chain from my trailer to my mom's pickup and draged the trailer over some more
http://mypage.uniserve.ca/~kvsbt/Midway%20Baricade/DSC01343.JPG

We figure that the Village of Midway is trying to force my mom off her land to develop a section of land that they own which is zoned for comercial use.

They can't obtain any legal driveway access since it goes onto a highway. So they are basicly stuck going through my mom's land. Which she won't let happen.

If you zoom in on Google Earth to 49.00'42.15"N 118.46'51.45"W you'll se her property right in the middle. It's the green land with the white on it. (nice long parcle 3.6 acres.

The commercial property is the parcel between there and the Crowsnest HWY.

I don't always get e-mail notification on pages anymore.

It isn't limited to this one either.

I somehow got it from this page before I even posted anything on this paticular thread.

Does anyone know of any Mischeif forums?
Or have any ideas.

I need some tips to slow down an illegal demolision crew from destroying a Quanset Hut building.

Here's the news story
http://www.chbc.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=12482

It's my mom's building, and the village obtained an illegal court order (not even signed by a Judge and several months old) and started ripping it apart yesterday.

Oddly enough when they showed up today they discovered my Blazer, with Trailer blocking 1 wall and my motorhome almost blocking the other open wall.

That's not mentioning the fact that about 10% of the bolts were welded.

They managed to get 12 of the un-welded bolts off in 3 hours. This is a crew of 3. They aren't suposed to damage anything although they have destroyed the 1 end wall. (It took them 1 full day of swearing to do it)

That's the family emergancy that I mentioned a few days ago.

We are getting a court order against them ASAP, but might not be able to until mid week.

I'll keep you guys all updated, and probably have a big story in a few days


I had the same problem when putting up my moms garage. They said I was 12" too tall so I built the grade up around the garage by adding dirt 3 feet out than told them to show me in the zoning laws where it stated how to measure it. They couldn't produce the instructions on how to measure it so I won.

Couldn't you just call the local/ or province police and report tresspassers. Make sure a "NO TRESSPASSING" sign is posted and visible though

How many of these have you guys broken in your home states?

DUMB LAWS Alabama
• Anniston: You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.
• Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.
• Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.
• Children of incestuous couples are deemed legitimate.
• Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.
• Hunting is not allowed on Sunday.
• Incestuous marriages are legal.
• It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
• It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.
• It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.
• It is illegal to stab yourself to gain someone's pity.
• It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
• It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.
• It is legal to drive the wrong way on a one way street if you have a lantern on the front of your car.
• It is unlawful to wear women's pumps with sharp, high heels.
• It's against the law for a man to seduce "a chaste woman by means of temptation, deception, arts, flattery or a promise of marriage."
• It's illegal to play dominoes on Sunday.
• Jasper: It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.
• Lee County: It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.
• Masks may not be worn in public
• Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.
• Mobile: It is unlawful to howl at ladies inside the city limits. It is unlawful to wear women's pumps with sharp, high heels.
• Montgomery: It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of it spooking horses.
• No persons may sell "blow-out nuts".
• Peanuts are not allowed to be sold in Lee County, Alabama after sunset on Wednesdays.
• Pool halls may not be operated between 11:30 PM and 6 AM.
• Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.
• Slavery is still legal in Decatur, Alabama.
• Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.
• Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.
• You cannot chain your alligator to a fire hydrant.
• You may not drive barefooted.
• You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.
• You must have windshield wipers on your car.
Alaska
• A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.
• Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear and take a picture for photo opportunities.
• Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.
• In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone's ear while they are moose hunting.
• It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
• Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time.
• Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
• State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist.
• While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.
Arizona
• A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
• Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony (This goes back in the days of the Wild West).
• Cards may not be played in the street with a Native American.
• Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
• Glendale: Cars may not be driven in reverse.
• Hayden: If you bother the cottontails or bullfrogs, you will be fined.
• Hunting camels is prohibited.
• In 1985, an Arizona legislator proposed that each candidate for the legislature take a reading and an I.Q. test three months before the election. The scores would have been posted on the ballot, had the bill passed. But a majority of legislators, for whatever reason, voted it down.
• In Arizona it is illegal to take naked photographs before noon on Sunday.
• It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling.
• It is illegal to hunt camels in the state of Arizona.
• It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.
• Maricopa County: No more than six girls may live in any house.
• Mesa: It is illegal to smoke cigarettes within 15 feet of a public place unless you have a Class 12 liqueur license.
• Mohave County: A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.
• Nogales: An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
• Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.
• Prescott: No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house.
• There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus.
• Tucson: Women may not wear pants.
• When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.
• When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person possesses.
• You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
Arkansas
• A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise.
• A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
• A voter is only allowed five minutes to mark his ballot.
• Alligators may not be kept in bathtubs.
• An Arkansas legislator not long ago proposed that the state provide growth hormones to dwarfs.
• Arkansas must be pronounced "Arkansaw"
• At Arkansas State University two people cannot hold hands while standing in a doorway unless they belong to a union.
• Fayetteville: It is illegal to kill "any living creature".
• Flirtation between the members of the opposite sex on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term.
• In Arkansas it is illegal to buy or sell blue lightbulbs.
• It's illegal to mispronounce the name of the state of Arkansas in that state.
• Little Rock: Dogs may not bark after 6 PM.; Flirtation between men and women on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term; It is unlawful to walk one's cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday; No person shall sound the horn on a vehicle at any place where cold drinks or sandwiches are served after 9:00 P.M. -Little Rock City Code Sec. 18-54
• Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.
• The Arkansas legislature passed a law that states that the Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock.
California
• A city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits.
• Alhambra: You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.
• Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
• Arcadia: Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.
• Baldwin Park: Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
• Bathhouses are against the law.
• Belvedere City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."
• Blythe: You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
• Burlingame: It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds; Carmel Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor); Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
• Chico: Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.
• Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
• Downey: It is illegal to wash your car in the street. (Passed 1995).
• Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.
• Hollywood: It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
• In 1930, the City Council of Ontario passed an ordinance forbidding roosters to crow within the city limits.
• In an animal shelter, lizards and snakes are treated under the same guidelines as cats and dogs.
• In Baldwin Park, California nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
• In California it is illegal to have caller ID
• In California you may not set a mouse trap without a hunting license.
• In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
• In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated.
• In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
• In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.
• It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
• It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.
• It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.
• It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
• It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
• It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub
• It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.
• It is illegal to set a mouse trap without a hunting license.
• Lafayette: You are forbidden to spit on the ground within 5 feet of another person.
• Lodi: It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String".
• Lompoc: It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.
• Long Beach: Cars are the only item allowed in a garage; It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
• Los Angeles law forbids hunting moths under a street light.
• Los Angeles: It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent; You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time; You may not hunt moths under a street light; It is illegal to cry on the witness stand; Toads may not be licked; It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church (Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison); Zoot suits are prohibited.
• Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.
• Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
• No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
• Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
• One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.
• Ontario: Roosters may not crow in the city limits.
• Pacific Grove: Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
• Palm Springs: It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.
• Pasadena: It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.
• Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
• Prunedale: Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.
• Redlands: Motor vehicles may not drive on city streets unless a man with a lantern is wallking ahead of it.
• Riverside: One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.
• San Diego: It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar; The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.
• San Francisco is said to be the only city in the nation to have ordinances guaranteeing sunshine to the masses.
• San Francisco: Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash; It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear; Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street; It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner; Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.
• San Jose: It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs. -Ord. 7.08.595
• Santa Monica: You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.
• Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
• Temecula: Ducks have the right of way to cross Rancho California St. at all times.
• The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one within city limits.
• Women may not drive in a house coat.
• You can be fined $500 if you bother a butterfly in Pacific Grove, Ca.

Colorado
• Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.
• Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers.
• Colorado Springs: It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays.
• Crippe Creek: It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.
• Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park; It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor; It is illegal to mistreat rats; You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
• Durango: It is illegal to go in public dressed in clothes "unbecoming" on one's sex.
• Have you ever had the urge to rip the tag from a pillow or mattress, despite the warning of dire penalties? Well, it's perfectly legal now, if you live in Colorado. The Governor formalized the law by gleefully tearing a label from a pillow at his office. "I've been worrying about the mattress inspector jumping through the window for years," he said.
• In Colorado it's now legal to remove the furniture tags that say, "Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law."
• In Denver, Colorado it is illegal for Barber's to give massages to nude customers unless it is for instructional purposes.
• In Denver, it is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next door neighbor.
• It is against the law in Pueblo, Colorado, to raise or permit a dandelion to grow within the city limits.
• It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep in Logan County, Colorado.
• It is illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out on the streets after 7 PM.
• It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.2% alcohol.
• It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.
• Logan County: It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.
• No liquor may be sold on Sundays or election days.
• Pueblo: It is illegal to let a dandelion grow within the city limits.
• Sterling: Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight.
• Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.

Connecticut
• A local ordinance in Atwoodville, Connecticut prohibits people from playing Scrabble while waiting for a politician to speak.
• A pickle is not officially a pickle unless it bounces
• Cattle branding in the United States did not originate in the West. It began in Connecticut in the mid-nineteenth century, when farmers were required by law to mark all their pigs.
• Devon: It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
• Druggists in Connecticut must pay $400.00 each year for a license in order to use alcohol in compounding prescriptions.
• Guilford: Only white Christmas lights are allowed for display.
• Hartford: You aren't allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands;
• In Connecticut any dogs with tattoos must be reported to the police.
• In Connecticut it is illegal to pirouette while crossing the street
• In Devon, Connecticut, it is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
• In Hartford, Connecticut, it is illegal to kiss your wife on Sunday.
• In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce.
• It is illegal to discharge a firearm from a public highway.
• It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.
• It's illegal to clam at night in Connecticut.
• New Britain: It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.
• No one may use a white cane, unless they are blind.
• Southington: Silly string is banned.
• The marriage of imbeciles and feeble-minded persons is prohibited.
• This state still retains an old law forbidding any kind of "private sexual behavior between consenting adults."
• Under the Code of 1650 in the New Haven Colony (in what is now Connecticut), a 16-year-old boy could be put to death if he "cursed, struck or disobeyed" his parents or was "stubborn or rebellious."
• Waterbury: It is illegal for any beautician to hum, whistle, or sing while working on a customer.
• You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
• You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
• You cannot buy any alcohol after 8pm or on Sundays.
• You may not educate dogs.

Delaware
• Delaware prohibits horse racing of any kind on Good Friday and Easter Sunday.
• In Delaware it is illegal to get married on a dare.
• In Delaware you may not sell dead people for money without a license.
• It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.
• Lewes: It is illegal to wear pants that are "firm fitting" around the waist; Getting married on a dare is grounds for an annulment.
D.C.
• A D.C. federal judge has ruled that begging is a form of free speech protected by the Constitution. That means that mugging is free speech too, only more persuasive.
• In Washington D.C. it is illegal to post a notice in public which calls another person a 'coward' for refusing to accept a challenge to duel.
• The only acceptable sexual position in Washington D.C. is the missionary position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal.
• The U.S. government says it's a crime to give false weather reports.
Florida
• (SARASOTA) It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
• A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
• Big Pine Key: It is illegal to molest a Key deer; If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail.
• Cape Coral: It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline; It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street (This law is limited to only those who do not own the house)
• Daytona Beach: The molestation of trash cans is banned; While intoxicated, being under influence of narcotics is prohibited; It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired;
• Florida deals with its prostitution problem by giving prostitutes spending money, a five-year banishment, and a bus ticket out of town.
• Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
• Florida prohibits topless walking or running within a 150 foot zone between the beach and the street.
• Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
• Hialeah: Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
• If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
• In Florida failure to tell your neighbor his house is on fire is illegal.
• In Florida it is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
• In Florida, a special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
• In Florida, men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
• In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays may be jailed.
• In Miami, Florida it is illegal for a man to wear any kind of strapless gown.
• In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
• In Sarasota it is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
• In Saratoga, Florida it is illegal to sing while wearing a bathing suit.
• It is considered an offense to shower naked.
• It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.
• It is illegal to fart in a public place after 6:00pm on a Thursday.
• It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
• It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
• It's illegal in Florida for an unmarried man and woman to live together in "open and gross lewdness." Connecticut once had a similar law, but only the woman was penalized.
• Key West: Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
• Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
• Miami: It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown; No person shall operate a bicycle unless it is equipped with a bell or device capable of giving a signal audible for a distance of at least 100 feet, but no bicycle shall be equipped with, nor shall any person use upon a bicycle, any siren or whistle.
• Oral sex is illegal.
• Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
• Pensacola: Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person; It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel; A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
• Pinecrest: In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained.
• Sanford Stage: Nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.
• Sarasota: If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00; You may not catch crabs.
• Tampa Bay: It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.
• When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
• Women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer. The salon owner can also be fined for this horrible crime.
• Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
• You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
• You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
• You may not kiss your wife's breasts.

Georgia
• Acworth: All citizens must own a rake.
• Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
• Atlanta: Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp; One man may not be on another man's back.
• Columbus: Can't cut off a chicken's head on Sunday; It is illegal to carry a chicken by it's feet down Broadway on Sunday.
• Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.
• Gainesville: Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
• In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
• It is illegal to change the clothes on a storefront mannequin unless the shades are down.
• It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro.
• It is illegal to take a bath of orange peel.
• It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
• It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
• Jonesboro: It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy"
• Kennesaw: Every head of household must possess a firearm of some kind.
• Marietta: Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
• Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
• No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.
• One man may not be on another man's back.
• Signs are required to be written in English.
• St. Mary's: No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.
• Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
• You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words.
Hawaii
• All residents may be fined as a result of not owning a boat.
• Coins are not allowed to be placed in one's ears.
• Honolulu: Within the limits of any public park, it is unlawful to annoy any bird.
• In Hawaii it is illegal to get a tattoo behind your ear or on your eyelid unless in the presence of a registered physician.
• It used to be the law in Hawaii that children had to obey all "lawful and moral" commands of their parents.
• It's illegal for a shooting gallery to offer liquor as a prize. The shooter might want to come back after drinking the prize and try again.
• You will be fined if you do not own a boat.
Idaho
• Boise: Residents may not fish from a giraffe's back.
• Coeur d' Alene: If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
• Idaho Falls, Idaho: If you're 88 years of age or older, it's illegal for you to ride your motorcycle.
• Idaho state law makes it illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
• If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
• Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
• In Pocatello, Idaho, a law passed in 1912 provided that "The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless same are exhibited to public view."
• It's illegal to hunt from the back of an anima.
• It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.
• Pocatello: A law passed in 1912 provided that "The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless some are exhibited to public view"; A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face.
• Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
• The town of Idaho Falls, Idaho, forbids anyone over the age of eighty-eight to ride a motorcycle.
• You may not fish on a camel's back.
Illinois
• A law from the early 1900's prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. (Repealed)
• A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.
• According to state law, it is illegal to speak English. The officially recognized language is "American".
• Champaign: One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.
• Chicago: Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire; It is illegal to give a dog whiskey; Kites may not be flown within the city limits; Spitting is forbidden
• Cicero: Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
• Crete: It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one's dog; Cars may not be driven through the town.
• Des Plaines: Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.
• Eureka: A man with a moustache may not kiss a woman.
• Evanston: Bowling is forbidden; It is illegal to go trick-or-treating on Halloween; It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
• Fairfield: It is unlawful for "Negroes" to be within county boundaries from sundown to sunrise.
• Freeport: It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window.
• Galesburg: There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
• Homer: It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
• In Chicago it is also illegal to take a French poodle to the opera, and for women over 200 pounds (90 kilos) to ride horses in shorts.
• In Chicago, Illinois, it is illegal to fish in pajamas.
• In Chicago, people who are diseased, maimed, mutilated, or "otherwise an unsightly or disgusting object" are banned from going out in public.
• In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.
• In Zion, Ill., it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animals kept as pets.
• It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of Urbana, Illinois.
• It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one's dog.
• It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets.
• It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
• It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
• It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
• Joliet: Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town's name mispronounced 'Jolly-ETTE' when all local folk know it's pronounced 'Joe-lee-ETTE', made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, punishable by a $5 fine.
• Kenilworth: A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow; Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
• Kirkland: Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kirkland's streets.
• Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
• Moline: Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited; There is a ban on unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.
• Morton Grove: You may not own a handgun
• Normal: It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
• Orland Park: No pool tables are allowed in a public establishment, because it supports gambling.
• Ottawa: Spitting on the sidewalk is a criminal offense.
• Park Ridge: Trucks may only park inside closed garages.
• Peoria: Basketball hoops may not be installed on a driveway.
• Pullman: It is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb; It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe's neck; It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
• The English language is not to be spoken.
• You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
• You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of "eavesdropping" on your own conversation. -720 ILCS 5/14-2.
• You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of "eavesdropping" on your own conversation.
• You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
• Zion: It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.

Indiana
• "Spiteful Gossip" and "talking behind a person's back" are illegal.
• A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
• A person who dyes, stains, or otherwise alters the natural coloring of a bird or rabbit commits a Class B misdemeanor. (Ind. Code 15-2.1-21-13(b)
• A three dollar fine per pack will be imposed on anyone playing cards in Indiana under the Act for the Prevention of Gaming.
• All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.
• Anyone 14 or older who profanely curses, damns or swears by the name of God, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, shall be fined one to three dollars for each offense, with a maximum fine of ten dollars per day.
• Auburn: It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area. For these offenses, there is a fine of no more than $5 or the impounding of one's bicycle for a period not to exceed 30 days.
• Back in 1924, a monkey was convicted in South Bend of the crime of smoking a cigarette and sentenced to pay a 25 dollar fine and the trial costs.
• Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
• Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
• Beech Grove: It is forbidden to eat watermelon in the park.
• Check forgery can be punished with public flogging up to 100 stripes.
• Citizens are not allowed to attend a cinema or theatre nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.
• Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest.
• Drinks on the house are illegal.
• Elkhart: It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid's ears.
• Evansville: While driving on Main Street you may not have your lights on.
• Fort Wayne: You may not sell or play on a radio broadcast, the record "It's In the Book".
• Gary: Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.
• Grocery stores may not sell any type of cold liquor.
• Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
• If any person has a puppet show, wire dancing or tumbling act in the state of Indiana and receives money for it, they will be fined $3 under the Act to Prevent Certain Immoral Practices.
• In Gary, Ind., persons are prohibited from attending a movie house or other theater and from riding a public streetcar within four hours of eating garlic.
• In South Bend, Indiana, it is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
• It is against the law to pass a horse on the street.
• It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.
• It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.
• It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid's ears.
• It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday.
• Liquor stores may not sell milk.
• Men are prohibited from standing in a bar.
• Monkeys are forbidden to smoke cigarettes in South Bend.
• Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.
• No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
• One man may not back into a parking spot because it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate.
• Oral sex is illegal.
• Pedestrians crossing the highway at night are prohibited from wearing tail lights.
• Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.
• South Bend: It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
• State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post.
• Terre Haute: No one may spit on the sidewalk.
• The value of Pi is 4, and not 3.1415.
• Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.
• You are not allowed to carry a cocktail from the bar to a table; the waiter or waitress has to do it.
• You are required to pour your drink into a glass.
• You can get out of paying for a dependent's medical care by praying for him/her.
Iowa
• A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
• Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.
• In Dubuque any hotel in the city limits must have a water bucket and a hitching post in front of the building.
• In Fort Madison the fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire.
• In Marshalltown horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants.
• In Ottumwa, Iowa, "It is unlawful for any male person, within the corporate limits of the (city), to wink at any female person with whom he is unaquainted."
• Indianola: The "Ice Cream Man" and his truck are banned.
• It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp.
• Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
• One-armed piano players must perform for free.
• Ottumwa: Within the city limits, a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.
• Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you -- or holding you in his arms.
Kansas
• Dodge City: It is illegal to spit on a sidewalk. All places of business must provide a horse water troft
• If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
• In Natoma, Kansas, it's illegal to throw knives at men wearing striped suites.
• In Wichita, at the intersection of Douglas and Broadway, all motorists are required to stop at the intersection, exit their vehicles, and fire three shotgun rounds, before continuing on their way.
• It is illegal to hunt whales.
• It is illegal to put ice cream on cherry pie in Kansas.
• Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to wear tail lights.
• Lawrence: All cars entering the city limits must first sound their horn to warn the horses of their arrival. No one may wear a bee in their hat.
• No one may catch fish with his bare hands in Kansas.
• No one may catch fish with his bare hands.
• Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
• Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats.
• Russell: Musical car horns are banned
• Salina: It is against the law to leave your car running unattended.
• The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
• Topeka: The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.
• Wichita: Before proceeding through the intersection of Douglas and Broadway, a motorist is required to get out of their vehicle and fire three shot gun rounds into the air. Any person caught using or carrying bean snappers or the like shall upon conviction, be fined. -City ordinance 349 of Wichita, Kansas.
Kentucky
• A Kentucky statute says: "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club." Later, an amendment proposed: "The provisions of this statute shall not apply to any female weighing less than sixty pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds; nor shall it apply to female horses."
• All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates of health, stating that the
• An excerpt from brilliant Kentucky state legislation. "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club". The following important ammendment however is to be considered here: "The provisions of this statuate shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds,
• Any person who appears on any highway, or upon the street of any city that has no police protection, when clothed only in ordinary bathing garb, shall be fined no less than five dollars nor more than twenty-five dollars." - KRS 436.140
• Any person who displays, handles or uses any kind of reptile in connection with any religious service or gathering shall be fined not less than fifty dollars ($50) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100). -KRS 437.060 (Passed 1942, from Ky. Stat. sec. 1267a-1.).
• By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground".
• Frankfort, Kentucky, makes it against the law to shoot off a policeman's tie.
• It is illegal in Kentucky to marry the same man more than 3 times.
• It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.
• It is illegal to shoot game out of the window of a moving vehicle, with the exception of a whale
• It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
• It's illegal to fish in the Ohio River in Kentucky without an Indiana Fishing License.
• Lexington: It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket. By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
• No person owning or controlling a billiard or pool table shall permit, for compensation or reward, any minor under eighteen (18) years of age to play any game on the table, unless such minor shall have first displayed an identification card containing his name, age, photograph, and the signature of his parents or guardian. The minor shall keep such identification card on his person, and it shall be subject to inspection at any time by any peace officer. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall keep and maintain a registration book in which each minor shall sign. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall supply a blank identification card to each parent or guardian who makes request for same. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than ten ($10) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100) for each offense. -KRS 436.320 (Passed 1893; Amended in 1954, Ky. Acts ch. 232, sec. 1)
• No person shall sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange, display or possess living baby chicks, ducklings, or other fowl or rabbits which have been dyed or colored; nor dye or color any baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits; nor sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange or to give away baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits, under two months of age in any quantity less than six, except that any rabbit weighing three pounds or more may be sold at an age of six weeks. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than $100 nor more than $500. -KRS 436.600 (Passed 1966 Ky. Acts ch. 215, sec. 5.)
• Owensboro: A woman may not buy a hat without her husband's permission. One may not receive anal sex.
All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates of health, stating that the apiary from which the bees came was free from contagious or infectious disease. -KRS 252.130 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1948)
Louisiana
• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault", while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault".
• It is illegal to gargle in public places.
• It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
• Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• New Orleans: You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant. It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it.
• Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
• Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
• You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
Maine
• After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
• In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
• In Portland shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
• It's unlawful to tickle a woman's chin with a feather duster in Portland.
• Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
• Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.
• You may not step out of a plane in flight.
Maryland
• Baltimore City: Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited. You may not curse inside the city limits.
• Baltimore: It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. It's illegal to take a lion to the movies. It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898) -Park Rule 6 It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
• Columbia: You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish. Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
• Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
• In Baltimore it is illegal to mistreat oysters.
• In Baltimore, it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks no matter how dirty they get.
• In Halethrope, Maryland kisses longer than one second are illegal.
• In Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband's pockets while he is sleeping.
• In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
• In the entire state of Maryland, it is illegal to give or recieve oral sex.
• It is a violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine.
• It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
• Ocean City: A law from the early 1900's prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited
• Thistles may not grow in one's yard.
• You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
• You cannot swear while inside the city limits of Baltimore.
• You cannot throw a bail of hay out of a second story window in Annapolis.
• You may not curse inside the city limits.

Massachusetts
• A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
• Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
• Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
• All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.
• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
• Boston: It is illegal to play the fiddle. Two people may not kiss in front of a church. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city. No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except o Sundays. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common. No one may take a bath without a prescription. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
• Bullets may not be used as currency.
• Burlington: You may not walk around with a "drink".
• Cambridge: It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
• Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
• Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
• Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
• Hingham: You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
• Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
• Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
• In 1659 the state of Massachusetts outlawed Christmas.
• In Boston, Massachusetts it is illegal to take a bath unless instructed to do so by a physician.
• In Salem, Massachesetts sleeping in the nude in a rented room is forbidden, even for married couples.
• It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
• It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
• It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder.
• It is illegal to reproach Jesus Christ or the holy ghost.
• It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
• It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
• It's illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building.
• It's illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road.
• It's illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
• It's illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color.
• It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
• Longmeadow: It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
• Marlboro: It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun. Silly string is illegal in the city limits. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
• Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
• Milford: Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
• Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• Newton: All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.
• No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
• North Andover: An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
• Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
• Public boxing matches are outlawed.
• Quakers and witches are banned.
• Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
• Southbridge, Massachusetts, makes it illegal to read books or newspapers after 8 p.m. in the streets.
• Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
• Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
• There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs tied during the month of April.
• Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
• Woburn: In bars, it is illegal to "walk around" with a beer in your hand.
• You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
• You may not curse inside the city limits.
• You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour.
Michigan
• A Michigan law states that a wife's hair legally belongs to her husband.
• A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
• Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
• In Clawson, Mich., there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
• In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.
• It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
• Smoking while in bed is illegal.
• You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.
Minnesota
• A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.
• A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
• All bathtubs must have feet.
• All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.
• Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
• Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.
• Clawson: There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
• Grand Haven: No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense.
• Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
• Harper Woods: It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets.
• Hibbing: It shall be the duty of any policeman or any other officer to enforce the provisions of this Section, and if any cat is found running at large, or which is found in any street, alley or public place, it shall be the duty of any policeman or other officer of the city to kill such cat.
• In Minnesota, it's illegal to tease skunks. (As if being sprayed weren't enough of a deterrent.)
• It is illegal to sleep naked.
• It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
• Minneapolis: Red cars can not drive down Lake Street
• No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
• Oral sex is prohibited.
• Rochester: All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police. Smoking while in bed is illegal.
• St. Cloud: Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
• There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat's head brought into a town office.
• Virginia: You're not allowed to park your elephant on Main Street.
• Wayland: Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day.
• You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.
Kalamazoo: It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend.
Mississippi
• Adultery or Fornication (living together while not married or having sex with someone that is not your spouse) results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison.
• Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.
• Columbus: The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.
• Horses are not to be housed within 50 feet of any road.
• It is illegal for a male to be sexually aroused in public.
• It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session.
• Oxford: It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session. One may not spit on the sidewalks on the square. Motor vehicles on the square are prohibited. Horn honking is not permitted as it might scare horses.
• Tylertown: It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street.
• Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
• Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
• Vagrancy is punishable by either 30 days in prison or a $201 fine.
Missouri
• Buckner: In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.
• Children can buy shotguns in Kansas City, Missouri... but not toy cap guns.
• Excelsior Springs: Hard objects may not be thrown by hand. Worrying squirrels is not tolerated.
• Four women may not rent an apartment together.
• Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
• In Merryville women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."
• In St. Louis, it's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.
• It is illegal to have oral sex.
• It is not illegal to speed.
• Kansas City: Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely. Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.
• Marceline: Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
• Marquette: It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).
• Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
• Minors in Kansas City, Missouri, are not allowed to purchase cap pistols; they may buy shotguns freely, however.
• Mole: Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.
• Natchez: It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.
• Purdy: Dancing is strictly prohibited.
• St. Louis: It's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets. A milk man may not run while on duty.
• University City: Four women may not rent an apartment together.
Montana
• It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
• It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
• Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
• It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime in Montana.
• Another law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
• Bozeman has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown -- if they're nude.
• Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party and it is legal to shoot them.
• It is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex in any other position other than missionary style.
In Montana, it is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.
• It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime.
• It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
• It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
• Excelsior Springs: Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
• Helena: No item may be thrown across a street.
• Salisbury: Pop bottles are not to be thrown on the ground.
• Whitehall: It is illegal to operate a vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.
Nebraska
• A man is not allowed to run around with a shaved chest.
• A parent can be arrested if her/his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service.
• If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.
• It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license.
• It is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.
• It is Illegal to go whale fishing.
• It is illegal to sleep naked in a hotel/ motel room.
• Lehigh: Doughnut holes may not be sold
• Omaha: Sneezing or burping is illegal during a church service.
• The owner of every hotel in Hastings is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.
• Waterloo: Barbers are forbidden from eating onions between 7 A.M. and 7 P.M.
Nevada
• A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people other than himself at any one period during the day.
• Clark County: An ordinance makes bringing a concealable fire arm into the county illegal unless it is registered with the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department. In order to register a handgun, however, it must be brought in to the police station. Furthermore, you may not register a gun on the weekends, but the police may prosecute you at that time.
• Elko: Everyone walking the streets is required to wear a mask.
• Eureka: Men who wear moustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
• In Eureka, Nevada men who have mustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
• In Las Vegas, Nevada: It's against the law to pawn your dentures.
• In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.
• It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
• It's still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.
• Nyala: A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people other than himself at any one period during the day.
New Hampshire
• Any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted with a device to gather its feces.
• If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter, hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for ''maintaining the national forest without a permit''.
• It is considered an offense to check into a hotel under an assumed name.
• It is illegal to pick seaweed up off of the beach.
• New Hampshire law forbids you to tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a tavern, restaurant, or cafe.
• On Sundays citizens may not relieve themselves while looking up.
• White Mountain Nat. Forest: If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter, hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for ''maintaining the national forest without a permit''.
• You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing to pay off a gambling debt.
• You may not run machinery on Sundays.

New Jersey
• Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.
• Bernards Township: It is illegal to frown as the town is a "Frown-Free Town Zone".
• Caldwell: You may not dance or wear shorts on the main avenue.
• Car dealerships are forbidden from opening on Sunday.
• Cranford: Citizens are not permitted to park their own boat on their lawn.
• Cresskill: All cats must wear three bells to warn birds of their whereabouts.
• Elizabeth: It is forbidden for a woman, on a Sunday, to walk down Broad Street without wearing a petticoat.
• If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated, you may never again apply for personalized license plates.
• In Berkley Heights you may not walk your cattle on the street on Sunday.
• In Newark it is illegal to buy ice cream after 6:00 p.m.
• It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
• It is against the law to "frown" at a police officer.
• It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.
• It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals at the local zoo.
• It's also illegal in this state to throw a bad pickle on the street.
• Lovers in Liberty Corner should avoid satisfying their lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.
• Manville: It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals a the local zoo.
• Newark: It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm, unless the customer has a note from his doctor.
• Ocean City: People may not slurp their soup. Pinball machines are not to be played on Sunday. Raw hamburger may not be sold.
• On a highway you can not park under a bridge.
• Raritan: Profanity is prohibited.
• Raw hamburger may not be sold.
• Sea Isle City: There will be no boiling of bones on the property.
• There is no horse racing allowed on the New Jersey Turnpike.
• Trenton: You may not throw a bad pickle in the street. Pickles are not to be consumed on Sundays.
• Unless you have a doctor's note, it's illegal to buy ice cream after 6 PM in Newark, New Jersey.
• You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service and full service only.
• You may not slurp your soup.
New Mexico
• Carrizozo: It's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.
• Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.
• In Albuquerque, New Mexico it is illegal for cab drivers to reach out and pull potential customers into their cabs.
• In Carlsbad it's legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to stop strangers from peeking in.
• In recent years, several efforts have been made to legalize camel racing and ostrich racing in New Mexico, but to no avail. Those bills were defeated, but the legislature recently allowed gambling on bicycle races.
• It's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.
• Las Cruces: You may not carry a lunchbox down Main Street.
• State officials ordered 400 words of "sexually explicit material" to be cut from Romeo and Juliet.
New York
• A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
• A license must be purchased before hanging clothes on a clothesline.
• A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ice cream cone in his/her pocket.
• Carmel: A man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
• Citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers".
• Donkeys are not allowed to sleep in bathtubs in Brooklyn, N.Y.
• During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks.
• In Carmel, N.Y., a man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
• In Greene, New York, During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks.
• In New York, you can teach your pet parrot to speak, but not to squawk.
• In Ocean City, New York It is illegal to eat in the street in residential neighborhoods, and the only beverage you can drink on the beach is water in a clear plastic bottle.
• In Staten Island, New York, It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer" in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."
• It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
• It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer" in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."
• It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing."
• It is illegal to jump off the Empire State building.
• New York: Citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers". It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing." You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public building. Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
• New Yorkers cannot dissolve a marriage for irreconcilable differences, unless they both agree to it.
• Ocean City: It is illegal to eat in the street in residential neighborhoods, and the only beverage you can drink on the beach is water in a clear plastic bottle. It is illegal for men to go topless in the center of town.
• Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 P.M.
• Staten Island: You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand. It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer" in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."
• The New York City Transit Authority has ruled that women can ride the city subways topless. New York law dictates that if a man can be somewhere without a shirt, a woman gets the same right. The decision came after arrests of women testing the ordinance on the subways. A transit police spokesman said they would comply with the new rule, but "if they were violating any other rules, like sitting on a subway bench topless smoking a cigarette, then we would take action." Smoking is not allowed in the subways.
• The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
• The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
• While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door.
• Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
• You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public building.
• You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand

North Carolina
• A marriage can be declared void if either of the two persons is physically impotent.
• All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart. Making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden.
• All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart.
• Barber: Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
• Chapel Hill: It is a misdemeanor to urinate or defecate publicly.
• Charlotte: Women must have their bodies covered by at least 16 yards of cloth at all times. E
• Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
• Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
• Forest City: You must stop and call City Hall before entering town in an automobile. This is so the townspeople will have time to go out and hold their horses until you get through town.
• Greensboro: Restaurants "with on sidewalk dining" must post their menu so that it is clearly readable from the sidewalk, but is not readable from the street.
• Hornytown: Massage parlors have been banned.
• If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married.
• In Barber, North Carolina fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
• In Chapel Hill, North Carolina it is a misdemeanor to urinate or defecate publicly.
• In Charlotte, NC, woman must have their bodies covered with at least 16 yards of cloth at all times.
• It is against the law to roller blade on a state highway.
• It is illegal to have sex in a churchyard.
• It's against the law to sing off key in North Carolina.
• It's against the law to sing off key.
• Kill Devil Hills: You may not ride a bicycle without having both your hands on the handle bars.
• Making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden.
• Oral sex is considered a crime against nature.
• Rocky Mount: It is required that you must pay a property tax on your dog.
• Southern Shores: It is against the law to roller-blade on a state highway.
• While having sex, you must stay in the missionary position and have the shades pulled.
• You may not ride a bicycle without having both your hands on the handle bars.
lon College: There is to be no roller-blading during daylight hours, on the roads, or on the bricks. All the sidewalks at this college are made of brick.

North Dakota
• Beer and pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.
• Fargo: One may be jailed for wearing a hat while dancing, or even for wearing a hat to a function where dancing is taking place.
• In Collierville: Keeping clean can be a chilly proposition, as a law there says all bathtubs must be kept in the backyard.
• In Waverly you better not let your horse near the tub, since horses are prohibited from sleeping in them, as well as in the house.
• It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on.
• It is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided you are in a covered wagon.
Ohio
• A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
• Bay Village: It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road.
• Bexley: The installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses is prohibited.
• Breast feeding is not allowed in public.
• Cars are not allowed to scare horses in Centerville, Ohio.
• Cincinnati: Anal intercourse is banned.
• Cleveland: It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license!
• Clinton County: Any person who leans against a public building will be subject to fines.
• Columbus: It is illegal for stores to sell corn flakes on Sunday.
• Fairview Park: It's against the law to honk your horn "excessively". A grandmother was fined for honking her horn twice at her neighbor. Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had the owner's permission.
• In Columbus, Ohio it is illegal to sell cornflakes on Sunday.
• In Marysville, Ohio it is illegal for a dog to urinate on a parking meter.
• In ohio it is illegal to ride on the roof of a taxi cab
• In ohio it is illegal to run out of gas
• In Ohio women are forbidden from wearing patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear
• In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25.00.
• In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
• Ironton: Cross-dressing is against the law.
• It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the police.
• It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
• It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
• It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
• It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance.
• It is legal to throw a snake at someone but it is illegal to shake a snake at someone.
• Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn • even though he had the owner's permission.
• Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had the owner's permission.
• It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.
• Lima: Any map that does not have Lima clearly stated on the map cannot be sold.
• Lowell: It is unlawful to run a horse over five miles per hour.
• Marion: You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
• McDonald: Your goose may not paraded down Main Street.
• No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
• North Canton: It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the police.
• Owners of tigers must notify authorities within one hour if the tiger escapes.
• Oxford: It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
• Participating or conducting a duel is prohibited.
• Paulding: A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
• Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed.
• The Ohio driver's education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car.
• Throwing a snake at anyone is illegal.
• Toledo: Throwing a snake at anyone is illegal.
• Women are forbidden from wearing patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear.
• Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
• Women aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes in Cleveland, Ohio, a man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't!"
• You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
• You may not run out of gas.
• Youngstown: Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed. You may not run out of gas.

Oklahoma
• A City Ordinance in Oklahoma, states that it shall be unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window.
• Ada: If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail.
• Anyone arrested for soliciting a hooker must have their name and picture shown on television.
• Cars must be tethered outside of public buildings.
• Clinton, Oklahoma has a law against masturbating while watching two people having sex in a car.
• Clinton: Molesting an automobile is illegal.
• Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
• Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
• Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus.
• Hawthahorne: It is unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window.
• If she's not a virgin, it is okay, but the said person must be over 16. If both parties are under 18, then the law does not apply.
• If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail.
• In Oklahoma... Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
• In Tulsa, Oklahoma the limit on kisses is three minutes (by law).
• It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle.
• It is illegal to have sex before you are married.
• It is illegal to have the hind legs of farm animals in your boots.
• It is illegal to wear your boots to bed.
• It's statutory rape for a man over 18 to have sex with a female under the age of 18, provided she's a virgin. If she's not a virgin, it is okay, but the said person must be over 16. If both parties are under 18, then the law does not apply.
• Molesting an automobile is illegal.
• No one may spit on a sidewalk.
• Oklahoma City: No one may walk backwards downtown while eating a hamburger.
• Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
• One may not promote a "horse tripping event".
• Oral sex is a misdemeanor and is punisable by one year in jail and a $2,500 fine.
• People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
• Residents are taxed for the furniture in their homes, and any other personal belongings.
• Schulter: Women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or while wearing a towel.
• Tattoos are banned.
• Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car.
• Tulsa: You may not open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer. Elephants are not to be taken into the downtown area.
• Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
• Whale hunting is strictly prohibitted throughout the entire state of Oklahoma.
• Whaling is illegal.
• Women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or while wearing a towel.
• Wynona: One's mode of transportation must be tied up while not attended. Mules may not drink out of bird baths. Clothes may not be washed in bird baths.
• Yukon: It is illegal to tie a horse in front of city hall. While passing another vehicle, you must honk your horn.

Oregon
• Beaverton: You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm.
• Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing.
• Dishes must drip dry.
• Eugene: It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays. It is legal to conduct a horse race or a symphony concert.
• Hood River: Juggling is strictly prohibited without a license.
• It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits.
• It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property.
• It is illegal to whisper "dirty" things in your lover's ear during sex.
• It's against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a skating rink.
• Just to let you guys know. there is a law in Portland, Oregon saying that it is illegal to own bolt cutters but yet they sell them in all the local hardware stores. One of our friends got pulled over for carrying a bolt cutter down the street and the police took it away from him saying it was illegal for him to have. (Reader Submitted)
• Klamath Falls: It's illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane.
• Marion: Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon.
• Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon.
• Myrtle Creek: One may not box with a kangaroo.
• No more than two people may share a single drink.
• One may not bathe without wearing "suitable clothing," i.e., that which covers one's body from neck to knee.
• One may not box with a kangaroo.
• People may not whistle underwater.
• Portland: It's against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a skating rink. People may not whistle underwater. You cannot wear roller skates in restrooms.
• Salem: Women may not wrestle in Salem. Springfield It is illegal to own a reptile within the city limits, unless you are a school or city, as a pet.
• Stanfield: It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits. Cloth towel dispensers are banned from restrooms. No more than two people may share a single drink.
• The "Peer Review Statute" prohibits you from finding out details of any written or oral discussion about your medical treatment. Not even a court of law can. All you can access is what the doctor or nurse voluntarily records in your chart.
• You may not pump your own gas in service stations.
• You must let your dishes drip dry.

Pennsylvania
• A person is not eligible to become Governor if he/she has participated in a duel.
• A special cleaning ordinance bans homemakers from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
• All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
• Allentown: There is a ban on men becoming aroused in public.
• Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue.
• Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes.
• Carlisle: In the middle of town, one must pay a fee of $50 dollars a year to park on a particular block. At night, however, the cars must be moved for street cleaning. This law is enforced even if snow or ice prevents the cars from being moved.
• Connellsville: One's pants may be worn no lower than five inches below the waist.
• Danville: All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
• Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.
• Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents.
• If a motorist sees a horse coming down the road, the driver must pull off to the side of the road and cover the vehicle with canvas. If the horse is still scared the driver must get out of his car and take it apart until the horse isn't scared anymore.
• In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth.
• In Pennsylvania, "any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue."
• In Philadelphia, you can't put pretzels in bags.
• In the Mount Pocono region any group of 5 or more Native Americans are to be considered a raiding party and may be killed on the spot.
• It is contrary to Pennsylvania law to discharge a gun, cannon, revolver or other explosive weapon at a wedding.
• It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that constitutes a brothel. However up to • 120 men can live together, without breaking the law.
• It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.
• Millville: One may not shoot any dog that is found wandering the streets. The sale of alcohol is prohibited.
• Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk.
• Morrisville: It is required that a woman have a permit to wear cosmetics.
• Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays.
• Newtown: Every outlet or switch (which can be purchased for 59 cents) that is installed requires an electrical inspection fee of 1 dollar and 33 cents.
• No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.
• No more than two packages of beer at a time may be purchased, unless you are buying from an official "beer distributor"
• No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.
• Pittsburgh: It is still illegal to bring a donkey or a mule onto a trolley car. No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.
• Ridley Park: You cannot walk backwards eating peanuts in front of the Barnstormers Auditorium during a performance.
• Tarentum: Horses are not to be tied to parking meters.
• The state law of Pennsylvania prohibits singing in the bathtub.
• Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land.
• Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land.
• You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth.
• You may not catch a fish with your hands.
• You may not sing in the bathtub.

Rhode Island
• Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void.
• Exercising any labor, business, or work, or using any game, sport, play, or recreation, or causing any of the above to be done to or by your children, servants, or apprentices on the first day of the week (Sunday) results in a penalty of $5 for the first offense and $10 for the second.
• Impersonating a town sealer, auctioneer, corder of wood, or a fence-viewer is against the law. Penalty: $20 to $100 fine.
• It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
• It is illegal to challenge someone to a duel, or accept a duel, even it it is never actually fought. Penalty: Imprisonment for one to seven years.
• It is illegal to coast downhill in your car with your transmission in neutral, or with the clutch disengaged.
• It is illegal to place a windmill within twenty-five (25) rods of any traveled street or road.
• Newport: You cannot smoke a pipe after sunset.
• Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a license to play games on Sunday.
• Providence There is not an appeals process for exemption of property tax due to a disability or poverty. It is illegal to wear transparent clothing. You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.
• Riding a horse over any public highway for the purpose of racing, or testing the speed of the horse is illegal. Penalty: Maximum $20 fine and imprisonment for 10 days.
• West Warwick It is illegal to use water on even-numbered days for the sole purpose of watering plants, gardens, or lawns. If you break this law there is a fine of $25-$100.
• You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.
South Carolina
• A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
• All schools must prepare a suitable program for Francis Willard Day.
• By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
• Charleston: It is against the law to drive a motorized vehicle on King Street. The Fire Department may blow up your house. This law was made so that the fire department could create a fire brake.
• Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
• Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
• Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
• Fountain Inn: Horses are to wear pants at all times.
• Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
• In some church in South Carolina, every man must bring a rifle to church on Sunday to ward off Indian attacks.
• In some town in South Carolina, it is perfectly legal for a man to beat his wife. But only if its on the courthouse steps on Sunday.
• It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
• It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
• It is illegal to communicate with a woman using obscene messages.
• It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
• It is illegal to give or receive oral sex.
• It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
• It is legal to beat your wife on a Sunday morning on the steps of the state house.
• It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
• Lancaster County: It is illegal to dance in public.
• Merchandise may not be sold within a half mile of a church unless fruit is being sold.
• Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
• No work may be done on Sunday. An exception is that light bulbs may be sold.
• Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
• Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
• Spartanburg: Eating watermelons in the Magnolia Street cemetery is forbidden.
• When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.

South Dakota
• If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
• In hotels in Sioux Falls, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!
• In South Dakota no horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
• It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
• Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
• No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
• Spearfish: If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.
Tennessee
•"Crimes against nature" are prohibited.
• Any person crippling, killing or in any way destroying a proud bitch that is running at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such killing or destruction.
• Driving is not to be done while asleep.
• Dyersburg: It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
• Fayette County: You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
• Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
• Hollow logs may not be sold.
• In Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it, waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
• In Tennessee hollow logs may not be sold.
• It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
• It is illegal to catch a fish with a lasso.
• It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
• It is legal to gather and consume road kill
• It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
• Knoxville: In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a "hitching post."
• Lenoir City: When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
• Lexington: No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk. Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
• Memphis: Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM. Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets of downtown Memphis. It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises.
• More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel.
• Nashville: Males may not be sexually aroused in public.
• Stealing a horse is punishable by hanging.
• The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
• You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
Oneida: An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song "It Ain't Goin' To Rain No Mo'."

Texas
• A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
• A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
• Abilene: It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing.
• Austin: Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
• Beaumont: Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University.
• Borger: It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind.
• Clarendon: It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.
• Dallas: It's illegal to possess realistic dildos.
• El Paso: Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them."
• Galveston: It is illegal to drive a motor car down Broadway before noon on Sundays.
• Houston: Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday. It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
• If two trains going in opposite directions on the same track meet each other, one can't move until the other does.
• In Alamo a person found intoxicated must be given a large dose of castor oil by a local doctor...and failure to gulp it down will result in a fine.
• In Corpus Christie it is illegal to raise alligators in your home.
• In Dallas County it is illegal to own any realistic looking, phallic shaped, personal massager more than one foot in length.
• In Houston you cannot buy beer after midnight on Sunday, but you can buy it on Monday.
• In Kingsville, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.
• It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
• It is illegal to carry a pair of wire-cutters in your back pocket.
• It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need a windshield, but you must have the wipers.
• It is illegal to have an open container in a car.
• It is illegal to have anything protruding from your bumper unless it is attached with a chain
• It is illegal to milk another person's cow.
• It is illegal to spit on the sidewalk.
• It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
• It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
• It is legal for a husband to beat his wife as long as he uses something no bigger than his thumb.
• It is legal for the blind to go hunting as long as they have someone with them who isn't blind.
• It is legal to commit a homicide as long as you tell the person when, and how you are going to kill them.
• It is unlawful for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed doing so by a peace officer.
• Jasper: Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times. Fine of 100 dollars.
• LeFors: It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
• Lubbock County: It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.
• Mesquite: It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
• Port Arthur: Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.
• Richardson: It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it visible from the street. It is illegal to do "U Turns".
• San Antonio: It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
• Temple: No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square. You can ride your horse in the saloon. Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
• Texarkana: Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.
• The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
• There is an old law in Texas that states you are unable to tuck your pants into one boot unless you own ten or more cattle.
• When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
• You can be legally married by publicly introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times.
Utah
• A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
• A Tremonton, Utah law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. • In addition to normal charges, the woman's name will be published in the local newspaper.The man does not receive any punishment.
• Birds have the right of way on all highways.
• In Monroe, daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
• In Utah when a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
• It is against the law to fish from horseback.
• It is considered an offense to hunt whales.
• It is illegal not to drink milk.
• It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.
• It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
• Kaysville: You must have identification to enter a convenience store after dark.
• Logan: Women may not swear.
• Monroe: Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
• No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
• No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance within the boundaries of Tremonton, Utah. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed.
• Provo: Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
• Salt Lake City: No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
• Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
• Tremonton: It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught, the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
• Trout Creek: Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.
• When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
• You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.

Vermont
• At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole.
• Barre All residents shall bathe every Saturday night.
• In Vermont It's against the law (not to mention impossible) to whistle under water.
• It is illegal to deny the existence of God
• Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week- - on Saturday night.
• Whistling underwater is illegal
• Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
Virginia
• Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
• Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars.
• Culpeper: No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
• Dayton: A person of color may not be outside or within the city limits after 7 pm.
• Driving while not wearing shoes is prohibited.
• If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations.
• In Newport it's against the law to tickle a girl under her chin with a feather duster in order to get her attention.
• In Norfolk a woman can't go out without wearing a corset.
• In Radford, VA you are not allowed to spit, loogie, puke or urinate on the streets.
• In Richmond, Va., you must buy a license for 93 cents to sell song books on the street.
• It is illegal to sell peanut brittle on Sundays.
• It is illegal to spit on sidewalk.
• It is illegal to tickle women.
• Lebanon: It is illegal to kick your wife out of bed.
• Norfolk: Spitting on a sea gull is not tolerated. A man may face 60 days in jail for patting a woman's derriere. Women must wear a corset after sundown and be in the company of male chaperone.
• Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary.
• Police radar detectors are illegal.
• Richmond: It is illegal to flip a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for a coffee.
• Stafford County: It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm.
• There is a state law prohibiting "corrupt practices of bribery by any person other than candidates."
• Victoria: It is illegal to skate down the sidewalk of Main Street.
• Virginia Beach: If you are drunk and not driving your car, and the person who is driving the car is drunk as well, you may both receive DUI's. It is illegal for a person to ride on the handlebars of a bike. It is illegal to use profanity on Atlantic Avenue or the boardwalk. It is also unlawful to drive by the same place within 30 minutes on Atlantic Avenue.
• Waynesboro: It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.
• You cannot buy hardware of any kind on Sunday.
• You cannot sell lettuce on Sunday, but you can sell beer, wine etc.
• You may not have oral or anal sex.
• You may not work on Sunday.
Washington
•"It shall be unlawful for a candidate for office or for nomination thereto whose name appears upon the ballot at any election to give to or purchase for another person, not a member of his or her family, any liquor in or upon any premises licensed by the state for the sale of any such liquor by the drink during the hours that the polls are open on the day of such election."
• A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
• All lollipops are banned.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
• Auburn: Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.
• Bremerton: You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
• Everett: It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
• In Seattle, Washington, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• In the state of Washington, there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances.
• It is illegal to deflower a virgin even on their wedding day.
• It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
• It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
• It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse.
• Lynden: Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
• People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
• Seattle: You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length. Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term. No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission. It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus • because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
• Spokane: TV's may not be bought on Sundays.
• Waldron Island: No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
• Wilbur: You may not ride an ugly horse.
• You are not allowed to breast feed in public.
West Virginia
• According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag.
• Alderson: One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash.
• Doctors and dentists may not place a woman under anesthesia unless a third person is present.
• Huntington: Firemen may not whistle or flirt at any woman passing a firehouse. It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps.
• If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined.
• In Alderson, West Virginia, it is illegal to walk a lion, tiger or leopard in the city limits, even it is on a leash.
• In Nicholas County, W. Va., no member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humerous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
• In West Virginia, it is legal for one to take roadkill home for dinner
• It is illegal to put an ice cream cone in your pocket on Sundays.
• It is illegal to snooze on a train.
• It is illegal to spit on any sidewalk which women may walk down.
• It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.
• It is unlawful for chickens to lay eggs before 8AM and after 4PM.
• Nicholas County: No member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
• No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."
• Road Kill may be taken home for supper.
• When a railroad passes within 1 mile of a community of 100 or more people in it, they must build a station and stop there regularly to pick up and drop off passengers.
• Whistling underwater is prohibited.
Wisconsin
• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
• At one time, margarine was illegal.
• Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
• Car dealerships cannot sell cars on Sunday.
• Cheese making requires a cheese maker's license; Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license.
• Citizens may not murder their enemies.
• Condoms were considered an obscene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist's counter.
• In Connorsville, Wisconsin no man shall shoot off a gun while his female partner is having a sexual orgasm.
• In St. Croix, women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.
• In Wisconsin you are allowed to marry your house.
• In Wisconsin, after 3:00 a.m., you have to send a rocket signal in the air after every mile you drive.
• It is illegal to cut a woman's hair.
• It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
• It is illegal to kiss on a train.
• It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
• Kenosha: No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.
• La Crosse: It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip). It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window. It is illegal to play checkers in public. You cannot "worry a squirrel."
• Milwaukee: An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car. It is against the law to play a flute and drums on the streets to attract attention. If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day. It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.
• Racine: It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep. Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.
• St. Croix: Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.
• State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
• Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
• While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license.
• You must manually flush all urinals in a building.
Wyoming
• An ordinance in Newcastle specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer!
• Cheyenne Citizens may not take showers on Wednesdays.
• It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking.
• It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people's view in a public theater or place of amusement.
• You may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June.

Looking through that list, it is amazing what is still on the books in some states.
In NJ it is still illegal to pump your own gas, and it is enforced. It is also illegal to park under a bridge on the highway if it is raining. I actually got a ticket for that at one time, and I was on a motorcycle.
I live in MD now, and I can think of at least ten that I've broken on that list, some with a smile on my face...

No liquor may be sold on Sundays or election days.
I sell 3.2% On Sundays, does that count?

Arizona
• A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month
I am sooo there.... just joking.

Oklahoma
• Anyone arrested for soliciting a hooker must have their name and picture
Old news, "John TV" on Public Access TV
• Clinton: Molesting an automobile is illegal.
but that tailpipe is teasing me

Looking through that list, it is amazing what is still on the books in some states.
In NJ it is still illegal to pump your own gas, and it is enforced. It is also illegal to park under a bridge on the highway if it is raining. I actually got a ticket for that at one time, and I was on a motorcycle.
I live in MD now, and I can think of at least ten that I've broken on that list, some with a smile on my face...

I live in Md and I know one on that list I would get the chair for. LOL

Well I had 2 doctors apointments today, but while I was gone one of the workers quit.

Yesterday before I left I worked out a gentlemans agreement that they would take their time to help us out. They got a big hoot ot of what I've done and added $500.00 to their costs.

Plus workmans Compensation has shut the job site down for an unknown amount of time.

The way that I see it we've basicly wone the last several battles, and after my treatments I'm ready to get the ball rolling again.

However I'm going to try meeting with the Village administrator tomorrow and work out a compromise.
Involving Bads idea, and some landscaping.
Which I was planning on doing anyways, I just haven't had the energy to.

Besides a heavy equiptment owner owes me several thousand dollars, this will give him a chance to work some of it off.

I'll let you guys know how it goes.

Well guys, I just posted my resume on Friday, and am already getting a few bites, mainly in the insurance field. I like my JOB now, but that's all it is. I see NO future there what so-ever. After being there 3 years, i was already making top pay; Its over 4 years now. I'd like to make it to 5 years to become vested and hopefully receive a pension in 40+ years when I retire (unless they UAL us). Unless you get into 1st assistant, or Store Manager, theres no money to be made. I am making good money now, but it not going up anytime soon. From what the other guys "Old Timers" have said, the top wage for our classification has been unchanged for over many years. Back in the 80's they were asked to take a pay cut, to where i'm assuming the wage is set at currently.

Good Luck with that Mike.

I sure hope that the best job out there finds you.

I live in Massachusetts and I have to agree with the "no tomatoes in clam chowder" law. :nono:

P.S. I have yet to see a bear in Boston Common, but I should probably buy a gun just in case. :22yikes:

Well I spoke with the village administrator this morning, and he told me that it's in the hands of the building inspector.

Of course when I called the building inspector we had a small chat and he said that he's ok with everything if I can get the village to agree to my terms.

So I called the administrator again and told him this. He is calling a council meeting on the matter. It's bought us at least 10 days, and the matter is hopefully over with.

We've got most of the local residents on our side, and will win in the long run.

Thanks for all the sugestions :cheers:

OBP I hope that the situation is truly resolved. I can imagine that the stress is pretty rough. I am glad to hear that yo uat least have some breathing room.