The ABSOLUTE ONE thing that pisses me off the most.... *warning, may get long*

[YellowMaranello]

So you ask, what is the ONE thing that pisses me off to no end and I can't seem to ever get rid of no matter how hard I try? Myself. I usually have an unusually tollerance for things that piss everyone off. I am almost NEVER pissed off at anything or anyone. Except myself. I can't stand the way I am sometimes. I just can't. I am WAYYYYYYYY too shy when it comes certain things. The latest time that I've pissed myself off was today. This girl that I worked with over the summer, was just amazing. I couldn't get enough of her. But today was the last day I work for the summer, and school starts. So this was the last time I would see her, and naturally, I was going to get her email/phone number, the whole works. BUT I FUCKING DIDNT. AND IT PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF THAT I DIDNT BECAUSE IM TOO DAMN SHY!@! I actually originally planned to get all this done weeks before now, and I kept putting it off and putting it off. I don't know why I didn't, I know I have a decent chance of getting into a relationship with her, I know that there was NO chance of her saying "well, I'm not going to give you my email address." AND I DIDNT DO A FUCKING THING ABOUT ANYTHING. Another thing I never do is curse. It pisses me off when I do. GAHHHHHHHH.. I hate myself right now. On the other hand, I'm changing myself. At least I keep telling myself that I am going to. I'm going to use rage this as motivation to get my ass in gear. Not putting anything off until the last second, only to not get it done anyways. I can't believe myself. wtf am I doing. Or wtf am I not doing... If you excuse me now, I'm going to go put fist sized holes in the first thing I see and hope it isn't anything expensive...



SUMMARY:
-Lost extremelly hot girl that I coundn't get enough of due to shyness.
-Pissed at myself.
-Even more pissed at myself.
-More pissed at myself then I've ever been in my whole life combined.
-Going to make myself feel better by beating the living shit out of the first moving thing I see.

[Oz]

Can you get this chicks number through friends of friends type thing? What causes the shy reaction? A fear of what people will think? I'm probably no help at all because I'm as extroverted as they come - I'm just genuinely interested as to what triggers the shyness?

[speediva]

Try faking self-confidence. I walk around pretending that I don't care what people think, and I pretend that everyone loves me, and everyone cherishes me and it gives me the motivation I need to flirt or even just get lunch by myself. (yes, I am that big of a dork that I don't like eating by myself... issues, I tell ya... issues)

I used to be "little, quiet 'tangie'" as I just found out through a friend of a friend type deal. When this girl heard that I rode a motorcycle, she just simply couldn't believe that "little" (I'm 5'9"), "quiet" (I like to rev on ricers, especially when I'm on my bike) me rode a motorcycle. Find a way to break your own shell, even if it means just acting. Hey, it adds a bit of variety, so that when people get to know you, there's all sorts of facets to work out.

[YellowMaranello]

Originally posted by ozriceboy
Can you get this chicks number through friends of friends type thing? What causes the shy reaction? A fear of what people will think? I'm probably no help at all because I'm as extroverted as they come - I'm just genuinely interested as to what triggers the shyness?

Well, could get her number through friends, but I just can't do that. If I'm going to get her number, I need to get it from her. Even though I have it upstairs in my room on the Employee List, I need HER to write it down or say, "well you have the list dont you?" I know I'd be MUCH MUCH MUCH happier if I did just call her, but it just doesnt seem right. And I talk to people that se goes to school with, but I cant really tell them to tell her that I want her email address, because then I feel like I'm 10. A fear of what people think? Don't think so. Not consciously anyways, could be sub-conscious though. I would have to say that the shyness is triggered by lack of experience. I've always been the perused, not the pursuer.
As for faking self-confidence. I usually can, no-problem. A nifty little thing I read somewhere abouth this, I forget where, but here is the general idea of what it said:

"Think of an emotion you would like to be able to put yourself into whenever you want. Think of a time you felt that emotion (in this case, confidence.) Now while your thinking of how this emotion felt, do a unique movement of some sort. For instance, think of a time you were extremely happy and how it felt then. Now while your thinking about how it felt, you could inhale deeply, then exhale through pursed lips while you blink rapidly. Practice this excersise. It associates that particular combination of movements with happiness. Now whenever you want to feel happiness, go through those motions and think about how it felt that one time. It will put you into whatever emotion you chose it to. Its almost like having a push-button for that emotion."

I've done this, and I have to say, it really does work great. But this time... I don't know, I just froze. I'm going to go kick things now because my hands hurt.

[Damien]

Originally posted by saturntangerine
Try faking self-confidence. I walk around pretending that I don't care what people think, and I pretend that everyone loves me, and everyone cherishes me and it gives me the motivation I need to flirt or even just get lunch by myself. (yes, I am that big of a dork that I don't like eating by myself... issues, I tell ya... issues)

I used to be "little, quiet 'tangie'" as I just found out through a friend of a friend type deal. When this girl heard that I rode a motorcycle, she just simply couldn't believe that "little" (I'm 5'9"), "quiet" (I like to rev on ricers, especially when I'm on my bike) me rode a motorcycle. Find a way to break your own shell, even if it means just acting. Hey, it adds a bit of variety, so that when people get to know you, there's all sorts of facets to work out.

I'm actually the most non-shy person there is! I'll do anything for a laugh and pretty much whatever someone dares me to practically.

Oh, but wait, there is more. I couldn't ask a girl out if my life depended on it. I mean, if my life depended on it i could, but nothing could make me. I've been dared to ask girls out and I did it, but it wasn't for real so that made it easier. My first girlfriend, well I found out she liked me and now all I had to do was ask her out but it took me a week to do so. Now, I could flirt easily and mess around with any girl, but when it comes to asking a girl out, I just can't do it.

If ya want to know more, http://www.freeopendiary.com/entryvi...96&entry=10002 , this site tells a lot.

I do though find talking to a girl in person is easier than over the phone because I can do some moves and it shows how you mean things better like facial expressions.

[darkness]

Dude, YellowM, I know exactly what you mean. I've done that many times. And I still do it.

Wether I can stop myself from doing it again I have no idea. I just try not to look back on the opportunities that I've missed because it hurts too much. But I look on it that if it was meant to happen it would have.

[Oz]

Damien - agree wholeheartedly. You have described ME perfectly as well. Such is life.

[carnut]

I'll offer up some advice, time heals all. I was extremely introverted when I was young, until the first time I actually got the nerve to ask a girl out. Surprisingly, girls said yes, even to me, and no they weren't my sisters friends or related, LOL. I still remember my first date, it was a girl older than me! So don't go beating your head against the wall, just go out there and enjoy your youth, old age comes soon enough.

[Ssom]

I know how you feel- I am so shy of girls- I think it's cause I can't face rejection- I am fine when it comes to talking to them on a more friendly basis- but I am useless when it comes to asking them out

[sarujin]

I've had some pretty similar experiences.

I was also the nervous kind of guy, but I've slowly got over that by just in a sense making a fool of myself. Not so much that people think I'm stupid, but enough that people notice me. Once people notice you, then you can talk to them and get too know them.

But the best way I've found to ask a girl out (since I'm too nervous just to ask staright out), is too get to know the girl for a month or two. Once you're their friend you can tell if they replicate your feelings back. If so just go for it and ask them, what have you got to lose. A little self-confidence maybe, but in 6 months time it doesn't matter.

Hell if i wasn't so shy a few years back I could have gone out with a couple of other girls. Who have told me later that if I'rd asked they would have said yes. That kind of shocked a nervous person like me.


So YellowMaranello even though this summer job has ended, couldn't you possibly contact the place you were working to find out this girls number? I dunno its just an idea.

sarujin

[YellowMaranello]

Well I just happen to be one of the luckiest people on earth. Just yesterday I was wondering around the mall with my bro, and guess who happens to walk by. I seriously couldn't believe my eyes. So not wanting to make the same mistake for the second time in 3 or 4 days, went up to her and got everything I needed. As far as calling the place where I used to work to get her number, I just couldn't do it. I had her number upstairs on a list with all of the employees and their phone numbers, but I need to get it from HER for my own comfort, otherwise I feel like a stalker. So, thats fixed for now, but I'm still pissed at myself for making a mistake like that in the first place.

[carnut]

Congratulations! Way to go, now that the ice is broken, I'm sure you'll have a good time. Doesn't it feel sooooooooo good?

[sarujin]

Thats awesome that you ended up seeing her again.

Good Luck

sarujin

[Spec2 Girl]

That’s awesome! Make sure you follow through and don’t let her slip away again.

[YellowMaranello]

Originally posted by Spec2 Girl
That’s awesome! Make sure you follow through and don’t let her slip away again.

I'll try not too, I just need to concentrate on not turning into super wussy boy while I'm talking to her now.