Divorce

[carmaster]

How many people have been thorugh it or had it happen to them. I found out today that my parent's are getting it after 18 years of marrige. How did you get through it? I've thought about sucide, but its too easy of a way out I atleast want to die with dignity doing something something hasn't attepted like a double back flip on a dirtbike or going for longest distance, or stealing a lambo at gun point and doing 190+ on I95.

[KennyH]

hey man... don't get upset about that- they are just doing what they feel is right- they might be happier seperate

[igor@af]

it's ok paul..
we're here to help you get through this...
im sorry this is happening...
but dont do anything crazy..
all of us have hard times like these... sometime..
you just have to get through this.....
dont worry about it man..... it should all work out fine...
you just need time...
im taking psychology.. and ive learned that during a divorce the everyone involved feels like you do... almost suicidal... but all you need is time to heal it...
dont worry.
i will talk to you about it on AIM if you want me to.
ttyl

[MBTN]

I've been through it. My parents were divorced after 23 years of marriage. 23 fucking years!

You know where to reach me.

[enzo@af]

I find the percentage of teenagers who consider suicide to be utterly disturbing...thankfully the number that are irrational enough to proceed with it is much lower. Still, suicide rates among teens is so much higher than adults. Frightening.
Anyways...
I've been through some tough bouts with parental situations myself. I don't remember my parent's divorce (I was 3 at the time) but I remember them fighting intensely for the next 10 years until my mother passed away. It was all tough, but I got through it. I think the one bit of advice I heard most, but used least was "I'm here to talk". Believe me....USE IT! Talking about it is the best way to deal with it. Bottling it up leads to internal strife, pity, and all that bad crap.

A few things to remember, carmaster:
1) It will all work out
2) Your parents love you, and it is not your fault (Yeah, you probably think you're too old to think you might feel "guilty" for it....you're not)--Quite the contrary. Children often keep marriages together longer than they would childless.
3) In the immortal words of MBTN..."You know where to reach me"
ICQ# 95969803
e-mail [email protected] or [email protected]

[carmaster]

I know I'm not gonna kill myself cause its just not right. But now ahts really bothering me is think about how there not gonna be together anymore during vacations, holidays and just everyday. I start to cry everytime I think about christmas and thanksgiving.

[Lizard King]

Its usually for the best.

I wish to hell that my folks had got divorced. Instead they stayed together and I spent my whole life up until recently in a house full of arguments.

I know its different for other people, but don't ever think of ending your on life.

[carmaster]

Thats the thing the past 2 years its been aweful the argue about every little thing and I can't remember the last 2-3 straight days were there hasn't been an arguement of some kind.

[Porsche]

Take it easy, my parents were divorced twice. They remarried the first time in 94 or 93 and then got divorced again in 97 or so. It was hardest on me because they got divorced on my birthday. After a while it isn't so bad. You'll get pissed alot and mad at them. I have to switch between houses every two weeks because they have joint custody. As for christmas and such, it isn't so bad. I get two of everything and so it helps to keep high spirits. My mom also has a boyfriend and he has really changed my life in a good way. So things may turn out for the better.

[Adam]

I couldn't stand it if my parents did. That would be awful, and I don't know if I can give any advice, but it could be alot worse and it is better than a death. You can still see your parents, and enjoy that

[Porsche]

That depends on custody Adam. I know people who never see one of thier parents agin. That isn't very reassuring tough, I'll silence myself.

[JD@af]

That's just terrible, man. My folks are not divorced thankfully, but I've seen them get on the verge of violent with each other in few and far between instances. Few things in life affect you the way these situations do.

I feel terrible for you. We are not your close friends here perhaps, but we are all part of a team, and we do our best to look out for each other. If there's anything we can do to help you get through this, you have our support and compassion at your disposal. Please, know that there are better days ahead.

Take care in these trying times-

-JD

[ichthus]

My parents divorced a few years ago too. I will admit that I took it really well at the time, but only because I felt that it was for the best. They didn't get along. Today, I know that the divorce caused trouble, still is giving my parents a lot of trouble as they fight over childsupport for my brother and paying for college for me and whatnot, but I also know that if not for the divorce I would not be in the position (physically, emotionally, or socially) that I am today...and for that I am thankful. Take it as a learning experience and make sure NOT to make the same mistakes they did.

[VTECelude]

i know what you're going through. i'm 21 now and i think my parents were divorced when i was like 5 or 6. i haven't seen my dad since then. that fucking asshole.

To be honest there isn't really anything you can do. i went through the whole therapy thing, but all that did was piss me off even more. i hate to tell you this but, just deal with it. that's what i did.

[JD@af]

It's been a while since you posted this.... How are you holding up?