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| COMPLETELY off-topic Talk about anything other than cars. But you can't be mad and angry in this forum! |
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#1
10-04-2001, 08:37 PM
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If Dear Abbey was a man....
If Dear Abby was a man...
Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me. A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old collage roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him. A: Do it. Sperm can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day, then cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys. A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral on him. Then cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay. A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should - he should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral on him and cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep never giving me one. A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal. :hehe: . . . credit- someidiot 
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#2
10-04-2001, 11:01 PM
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Dame those ar funny, my wife doesn't like you no more but your my body!
Exactly what I was thinking, those are my 2 favorite things on earth! 
__________________
(I hear what you are saying but I feel you are lieing to me, would love to say to BUSH!) "Don't trip, skip, pinch your forehead"! 1988 CRX Si 2001 CBR 600F4i Silver & black FAST! 2004 Toyota Tundra (TRD) 2002 dodge grand caravan.
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#3
10-04-2001, 11:05 PM
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Hehe, tell her I am really sorry :silly2: I am not really this way, honest. In fact, I am sure I will get razzed for this one, along with the other thread. 
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#4
10-04-2001, 11:29 PM
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Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
Quote:
valkrie: you mean buddy right?
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L"
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#5
10-05-2001, 12:40 AM
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Re: Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
Quote:
Those are very funny. Sounds a lot like a 1950s house wife training manual.
__________________
Connecting the Auto Enthusiasts
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#6
10-05-2001, 12:43 AM
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Hehehe I'm going to print this out and leave it under the wife's pillow. :hehehe:
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#7
10-05-2001, 01:05 AM
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Quote:
Or are you just hoping for a good hot meal.
__________________
Connecting the Auto Enthusiasts
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#8
10-05-2001, 01:15 AM
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Quote:
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#9
10-05-2001, 05:58 AM
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Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
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__________________
Current Build.....1/12 Scale Camaro......Almost finished!!!    View All My Models Here.
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#10
10-05-2001, 08:25 AM
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__________________
Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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#11
10-05-2001, 03:51 PM
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Quote:
__________________
 ec437 on grammar; Quote:
Quote:
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#12
10-05-2001, 03:54 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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#13
10-05-2001, 04:10 PM
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Quote:
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L"
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#14
10-05-2001, 04:16 PM
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Lucky You, I get to sit home, Tommorrow is going to be more interesting though. Going to the "races"
__________________
ec437 on grammar; Quote:
Quote:
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#15
10-05-2001, 04:35 PM
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Quote:
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L"
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