A repost worth its weight in gold

[YogsVR4]

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE !

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us bitching about you leaving it down.

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Saturday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Don't cut your hair - ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!


1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say < nothing, > we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle or row to find out.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. No NO you really do have too many shoes.

1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

1. I'm in shape. Round IS a shape.

[turbo2nr]

hhahahaha so tru ,

its so tru

[carrrnuttt]

So true! I copied it and am E-mailing it to a few female friends.

[boingo82]

Originally posted by YogsVR4

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us bitching about you leaving it down.

Nobody falls in when we leave it down.

Originally posted by YogsVR4
1. Saturday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

And Sunday, and Monday....

Originally posted by YogsVR4
1. Check your oil! Please.

Like women are the only ones with this problem... http://cartalk.cars.com/Columns/Arch...vember/04.html

Originally posted by YogsVR4
1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

Well then try to be less obvious about it, would you?

Originally posted by YogsVR4
1. I'm in shape. Round IS a shape.

And God Forbid a woman accumulate "a bit of podge".

[YogsVR4]

There it is! Boingo did it! I figured it would be tangie who would be the first woman to raise a stink and whine about the list. Don't become a Moppie* whenever someone says anything funny about your gender (as opposed to his country)








* Disclaimer to Moppie - I draw a distinction between making a joke and making an accusation.

[turbo2nr]

i got 2 forward 2 sum chicks 2 lol

they need 2 hear dis especially the bitche ones!!

[taranaki]

Missed one.....

The shed.It's mine.If I wanted it tidy,I'd tidy it.























Now I guess I'd better go find the yard broom.........

[primera man]

Copied and left for the PLady to read ....i'll probably be dead after see reads it though

[Jimster]

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

I have 4 pairs :o 5 if you include rugby boots:o

[S Brake]

[comic book guy]Best thread ever[\comic book guy]



edit: just made this on photoshop

[Moppie]

Originally posted by YogsVR4

* Disclaimer to Moppie - I draw a distinction between making a joke and making an accusation.

My flat mate practices

Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

On his fiance all the time. Unless he simply asks for something he simply ignores her.