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| COMPLETELY off-topic Talk about anything other than cars. But you can't be mad and angry in this forum! |
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#1
09-22-2002, 04:24 AM
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Product warinings (some old some new)
On a lawnmower I had was a big label which read:
"WARNING WHEN MOTOR IS RUNNING- THE BLADE IS TURNING!" We once bought a grocery store pizza and the instruction were on the bottom, so we turned it upside down to see how long to cook it etc., and low and behold the first instruction was DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN! Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice… My bathroom has inadequate ventilation and therefore, develops mold spots in the lower corners. I attempted to purchase a cleaner specifically designed to remove bathroom mold deposits. The directions on the product label stated, "Only use in well ventilated areas." Seen on the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle: "Do not open here." On a bottle of spray paint: "Do not spray in your face." On a bottle of bathtub cleaner: For best results, start with clean bathtub before use. On a container of lighter fluid: WARNING: Contents flammable! On a bottle of hand lotion: Warning: Starts healing skin on contact. On a box of household nails: CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May cause irritation! Microwave popcorn is packaged so that the directions cannot be read unless you open the plastic and unfold it. Direction #1 is Remove plastic. On a television commercial that says it cleans dentures 4 times better. Below in small print it said "Lab test: (their product) vs. water. On a television commercial I saw it said they their denture paste was better than any other. BELOW IT, it said in small letters, vs. using no adhesive. I have a full-face motorcycle helmet with a giant arrow pointing to the front. I can only guess that some idiot put the helmet on backwards, jumped on a bike and hurt himself. This is to protect to manufacturer from future lawsuits. One day I went to a wall-mart out of state and I went to buy a blow dryer when I read the warnings it said "DO NOT BLOW DRY IN SLEEP" Seen on the back of a drink bottle label: "Do not peel label off." On a Band-Aid box: "For serious injuries, seek medical attention." On a can of powdered infant formula: "Mix with water before serving." Like I'm going to spoon it to my baby dry! This stupid label was found on a can of Woolite carpet cleaner: "Safe for carpets, too!" This label was found on the BOTTOM of a box of glass ornaments: "Do not turn upside down." On a box of Frosted Cheerio's, the logo, "Tastes so good this box never closes," is located just underneath another announcement: "To close: place tab here." On a plastic orange juice can: "100% pure all-natural fresh-squeezed orange juice from concentrate." I once saw an ad for some type of contest on a candy bar. The wrapper said "No purchase necessary - Details Inside." Directions for eating Lunchables Nachos: Dip chips in cheese and salsa. The golf carts on the course I worked at have warning labels saying, "Not for highway use." On Clorox Fresh Care: (for cleaning out odors from fabric) "Safe to use in households with pets Warning: Fresh Care is NOT intended to be sprayed directly on pets." While working at a large medical center in the Midwest, a construction worker was admitted with a large hammer sticking out of his head. Seems he was in an altercation with another gentleman. On the side of the hammer were the words, 'Use protective eyewear.' On the back of the Pilots seat on NATO AWAC Aircraft (E-3A), is a sign that states: "Seat must be facing forward for take off and landing." I came upon a bottle of children's cough medicine stating "Caution: May cause drowsiness; do not drive or operate heavy machinery" On the label of Sterno is a warning that says, "Do not use near fire or flame." Check it out! Seen on a container of salt: Warning: High in sodium Seen on computer instructions: Visit our site for further instructions. http://www.pc.com/pc/instructions.htm On a hose nozzle there was a warning that said: "Do not spray into electrical outlet." Seen on an industrial size washer in our local laundry establishment was the (large lettered) sign: "Warning: Do not put any person in this washer." There is also a stroller on the market with the warning, "Remove child before folding." I saw a car ad depicting cars driving in the water with fins like sharks. At the end of the ad in small letters it read: "Caution, do not drive underwater"
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#4
09-22-2002, 05:12 PM
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:hehehe: There are some really stupid people out there! :hehehe:
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My latest ride!  1998 Nissan Skyline R34 GT-t 
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#5
09-23-2002, 10:49 PM
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I used to have a disposable cigarette lighter with a warning that said: "Keep away from flame"... Man, that thing was hard to use!
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#6
09-24-2002, 11:45 AM
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Re: Product warinings (some old some new)
Quote:
Warning: Do not use in shower. another thing i have found amusing with some cars i have owned. they have a special valet's key that will only operate the door lock and ignition, but not the glove box or trunk. yet there is a remote trunk release right next to the driver's seat on the floor.
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Shawn --- 1979 Porsche 924S 1987 Honda CRX HF -- Project Chassis 1989 Acura Integra LS -- Project Parts Donor 
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#7
09-24-2002, 12:43 PM
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On an old gas pump in Benklemen, NE, I saw a sticker that read:
DANGER!! Gasoline Flammable, Do Not Flame Good stuff.
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So the biblical scholars mis-translated the Hebrew word for "young woman" into the Greek word for "virgin," which was a pretty easy mistake to make, since there is only a subtle difference in the spelling. But back then it was the "virgin" that caught people's attention. It's not every day a virgin conceives and bears a son. So you keep that for a couple of hundred years, and the nexy thing you know, you have the Roman Catholic church. -Snatch
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#8
09-24-2002, 01:37 PM
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On the back of a shirt of a bomb technician:
"I am a bomb technician, if you see me running, try and keep up!" I've been keeping an eye out for bomb technicians ever since.
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Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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#9
09-24-2002, 03:36 PM
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[quote]Originally posted by DVSNCYNIKL
[b]On the back of a shirt of a bomb technician: "I am a bomb technician, if you see me running, try and keep up!" Thats from that movie....ahhhh......morgan freeman and afleck...Sum of all Fears, yea too much :bonghitte
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So the biblical scholars mis-translated the Hebrew word for "young woman" into the Greek word for "virgin," which was a pretty easy mistake to make, since there is only a subtle difference in the spelling. But back then it was the "virgin" that caught people's attention. It's not every day a virgin conceives and bears a son. So you keep that for a couple of hundred years, and the nexy thing you know, you have the Roman Catholic church. -Snatch
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#10
09-24-2002, 03:52 PM
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there was something of that sort that the title was " ONLY IN AMERICA"
it was something like... ONLY IN AMERICA... do stores open 24 hours a day 7 days a week..have locks on the doors do people go to mcdonalds and order a large fry with a big mac..and a diet soda do banks leave the doors unlocked..but chain the pens to the counter there were more ..but i dont remember them
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Who’d dare build a car without doors or side windows or a hood? Only Lotus. And who’d dare drive one? You would. The 340R is the sports car for people who live to drive and want the whole experience as raw and as pure as it comes.
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#11
09-24-2002, 06:13 PM
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Re: Only in america
Yea, i have seen a few of those:
Only in america can you find braille on a drive through machine can you buy a car, real estate, and bulk foods at the same store (Cost-co and others) etc. etc.
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So the biblical scholars mis-translated the Hebrew word for "young woman" into the Greek word for "virgin," which was a pretty easy mistake to make, since there is only a subtle difference in the spelling. But back then it was the "virgin" that caught people's attention. It's not every day a virgin conceives and bears a son. So you keep that for a couple of hundred years, and the nexy thing you know, you have the Roman Catholic church. -Snatch
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#12
09-25-2002, 03:33 PM
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anyone ever heard those chinese acronyms things...i cant spell it
but one goes man who walk through airport turnstile going to bangkok haha or virginity like bubble one prick and it all gone there are more ill try an find them
__________________
Who’d dare build a car without doors or side windows or a hood? Only Lotus. And who’d dare drive one? You would. The 340R is the sports car for people who live to drive and want the whole experience as raw and as pure as it comes.
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#13
09-25-2002, 03:36 PM
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confucious say:
man who stick dick in jar of peanut butter, is f**king nuts man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
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Shawn --- 1979 Porsche 924S 1987 Honda CRX HF -- Project Chassis 1989 Acura Integra LS -- Project Parts Donor
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