|
| Search | Car Forums | Gallery | Articles | Helper | Air Dried Fresh Beef Dog Food | IgorSushko.com | Corporate |
|
|||||||
| COMPLETELY off-topic Talk about anything other than cars. But you can't be mad and angry in this forum! |
 |
 Show Printable Version | 
Subscribe to this Thread
|
|
|
Thread Tools |
|
#1
10-10-2006, 03:20 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Tom did like he always does, kissing his wife, crawling into
bed and falling to sleep. All of a sudden, he wakes up with an elderly man dressed in a white robe standing in front of his bed. "What the hell are you doing in my bedroom?...and who are you?" he asked. "This is not your bedroom," the man replied, "I am St. Peter, and you are in heaven." "WHAT! Are you saying I'm dead? I don't want to die! I'm too young," said Tom. "I want you to send me back immediately." "It's not that easy", said St.Peter. "You can only return as a dog or a hen. The choice is your own." Tom thought about it for a while, and figured out that being a dog is too tiring, but a hen probably has a nice and relaxed life. Running around with a rooster can't be that bad. "I want to return as a hen," Tom replied. And in the next second, he found himself in a chicken run, really nicely feathered. But now he felt like his rear end was gonna blow. Then along came the rooster. "Hey, you must be the new hen St. Peter told me about," he said. "How do you like being a hen?" "Well, OK I guess, but it feels like my ass is about to explode." "Oh that!" said the rooster. "That's only the ovulation going on. You need to lay an egg." "How do I do that?" Tom asked. "Cluck twice, and then you push all you can." Tom clucked twice and pushed more than he was good for, and then 'plop' an egg was on the ground. "Wow" Tom said. "That felt really good!" So he clucked again and squeezed. And you better believe that there was yet another egg on the ground. The third time he clucked, he heard his wife shout: "Tom, for Christ's sake! Wake up! You're shittin' all over the bed!" 
__________________
http://public.fotki.com/tonioseven/ 
|
|
#3
10-10-2006, 03:46 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
hahaha, i like...
__________________
 88 10th anniversary rx7 and company h2.  [IMG] [/IMG]  [IMG]atkins streetported 3mm seal engine, act clutch, lightweight flywheel, downpipe, straightpipe, greddy power extreme exhaust, hks ssqv blow off valve, short shifter, tein flex suspension, energy bushings, bonez intake, new brakes, rotors, toyo tires, mazdaspeed replica seats
|
|
#5
10-10-2006, 04:41 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Quote:
__________________
http://public.fotki.com/tonioseven/
|
|
#6
10-10-2006, 05:00 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
dogfood
__________________
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious... He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand to rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.
|
|
#7
10-10-2006, 07:53 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
__________________
ECNATSISER AL AVIV 
|
|
#8
10-10-2006, 07:55 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Quote:
__________________
Seatbelts Saved My Life 
|
|
#9
10-10-2006, 08:00 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Quote:
"That shit was dogfood man!" "Hells yeah! It was totally tits!"
__________________
ECNATSISER AL AVIV
|
|
#10
10-10-2006, 08:02 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Quote:
right... mmm....tits....
__________________
Seatbelts Saved My Life
|
|
#12
10-10-2006, 08:10 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Quote:
well, we are now.
__________________
Seatbelts Saved My Life
|
|
#13
10-10-2006, 08:19 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
I'd like to see what direction the joke would've taken if he wanted to come back as a dog
 .
__________________
Thought for the Day… Alcohol does not make you fat - It makes you lean... against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.  If a prostitute here in America loses her job to a prostitute in India , is that considered "outwhoring"??-Jay Leno
|
|
#14
10-10-2006, 08:20 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
he'd probably have one leg in the air, and he'd be pissing all over his wife...
__________________
Seatbelts Saved My Life
|
|
#15
10-10-2006, 10:26 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Sorry Dave but I just HAD to!!!
Or he would've woken her up in a most inappropriate fashion from her posterior
__________________
ECNATSISER AL AVIV
|
|
|
POST REPLY TO THIS THREAD |
 |
|
|
