Me, My Ex, and him.

vinnym86 · #1 10-05-2006, 01:13 PM

You know that really terrible feeling in your stomach, like butterflies, except butterflies that drool HCl acid and have razor wings? the feeling you get when you're say... totally depressed? yeah... fuck that shit.

I still love my ex. I thought all this time i just became really good friends, like, never really saw anything going anywhere, just some occasional flirting and shit, other than that, shit friends talk about... I've even hooked up with other girls since... but i'm slowly coming to realize i still really love her... and she's madly in love with some other dude. the kid's alright, he's nice n rich n all, but he's really young n immature imo, but w/e... i just don't know how to convince myself to let go. i think i'm just going through this little depression phase or something... with all this other shit i have to deal with...

00accord44 · #2 10-05-2006, 06:11 PM

That definitely blows. Not to belittle your feelings, but are you sure you're not just feeling this way because she's with the other guy? As in "you always want what you can't have"? I convinced myself I REALLY wanted to be with one girl while she was with some guy. Then once she wasn't with him anymore, the appeal faded. There was a lot more that went into that situation, but at its core that was pretty much it.

vinnym86 · #3 10-05-2006, 09:26 PM

no, i still really care for her. i'm going to have to supress any depression over this, because i already know its stupid for me to be like this. Its better anyway if i stay really close friends with her... we're better at that then being together, anyway, which is why we ended up apart to begin with.

...God i need some alcohol.

TexasF355F1 · #4 10-05-2006, 10:09 PM

Sorry to hear the Vin. I know the feeling, to a degree. Your strong to be able to be around them. At least you're not angry at the guy for no reason like a lot of guys would be. It may be best to just step out for a bit, tell her how you feel before you do though. I don't really know though. It's a tough call on all accounts.

vinnym86 · #5 10-06-2006, 12:22 AM

^why complicate it by telling her? i'm sure she might already know. Better i just be there for her as a friend when she needs it and get on with my own life.

poormillionaire2 · #6 10-06-2006, 04:07 PM

Personally, I think you need to give yourself space from her. These feelings you have aren't going to subside with you being around her. Give yourself a few weeks without seeing her or talking to her and keep youself busy to keep your mind off things. I won't lie, its tough. I recently went through something similar, but not as bad. Long story short: my g/f of 1 year broke up with me, got a new b/f a few weeks later, and then realizes how well I treated her. I can't decide whether or not to take her back. The way I look at it, she practically cheated on me, but she really didn't. And I don't tolerate cheating.
Well, anyway, sorry to get off track, back to your thread and your issue. Like I said earlier, give yourself some time and space. And keep yourself busy, buy some shit for your car and wrench on it for awhile. After my break-up, I installed some headers on my car and worked alot.

ghostrx7 · #7 10-06-2006, 04:47 PM

definately a ruff situation, me being the jealous type i get that feeling when i see my ex's too. not really sure if time away is the answer, maybe telling her the truth(as a friend) would get alot off ur chest. something like, i know we're just friends, and i dont know why, but seeing u with someone else really gets to me. i dont know why i feel this way, and i hope i dont put u on the spot, but i just wanted u to know.... it probably is the (dont know what u got till its gone thing) but u gotta deal with it. if u dont talk to her for a while, it may increase ur feelings, but u never know

goodluck bro...

vinnym86 · #8 10-07-2006, 02:34 AM

I can't not see her for more than a couple days... I'm her ride to school (we commute). that, and we have 2 classes together. Plus, like i said, she's also a really close friend, so its not like i can just ignore her for a week.
besides, i'm not one to belive much in "outta sight, outta mind"... it kind of takes with "put your problems aside for a while". I'll just put up with it, find a way to deal with it, and we'll see how it goes from there. I'm not saying i'm hung up on her, i've still been out there having my fun... its just an intimiate feeling that i'm missing, i guess.

poormillionaire2 · #9 10-07-2006, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vinnym86

... its just an intimiate feeling that i'm missing, i guess.

Maybe you should starting dating around and try and find someone else to have that closeness with. I Know dating can be a long process, but you have to start somewhere.

Steel · #10 10-11-2006, 06:06 PM

I know exactly what you mean dude, becasue i'm in the exact same situation. I have come to terms with my feelings for her will never really go away and that we'll always be just friends. It hurts, but i think it'll hurt a lot more if you say something to her, make things weird, and never see her again. Keep your mouth shut. Just let it be, and it'll just be that nagging pain in your knee instead of having your leg lopped off. You'll eventually get used to it, and use the enjoyment of you time spent with her to cancel out the bad vibes you have when she's not around.
That's all I can offer.

vinnym86 · #11 10-12-2006, 04:30 AM

thanks.
u know, random story i'm sure isn't too interesting, but its 5am and havn't slept a wink.
lately, she's been a subtle bitch, lol. i haven't really cared much, but she's been trying to make a point of it without actually pissing me off. Got to talking with her the other night, and she told me why she's been doing that. She says she's tired of seeing me blow off a lot of important things every week because of who i am; she doesn't want me to get up in the middle of the night to drive home drunk friends, putting off school to stay with a close friend who was feeling very down, etc. She also says that i'm too nice, that i'm actually hurting myself by being myself. (the way i think is i put myself after people i care about. its just my thought process since high school. It's nice to know i'm a selfless saint, lol, but a shrink has actually told me its a residual effect of manic depression i used to suffer from.) Apparently, she's been trying to be a bitch to me to show me that i have to be a bitch myself in order to put away "who i am" so i can actually stop hurting my future. She says she sees in me so much potential to build a healthy future and career but i seem to put it off for lack of selfishness.
wierd story, i know, but the reason i felt like sharing was because it made me realise she still cares the same way she used to, and it made me feel warm even though she's still being a bitch, lol. I think this is why i got "jealous" before, i miss knowing she cared, but i know she still will, like i do. as for listening to what she said? right... can't exactly change who i am, but w/e, she'll give and stop being a bitch eventually.

Oz · #12 10-12-2006, 05:59 PM

Dude, what a head case. I think you need a holiday a longgg way away from all that crap.....and soon.

vinnym86 · #13 10-14-2006, 04:27 PM

its just engraved in her head that money equals sucess, and sucess comes from hard work. the latter i think true, the former i think not. to me, hapiness is sucess in life, and money can't buy that. that's why i'm not really gonna listen to her, but ur right, i need a damn vacation from everything here.

jcsaleen · #14 10-14-2006, 06:30 PM

Damn man, I used to feel like that till I woke up one day... I said Fuck this shit why am I obsessing over one being out of the 6 Billion out there. Life's to big for one being to effect my outcome of the rest of my life. I made myself completely cold since then, I hook up with other girls but really don't have any real attachment to any. The only attachments I have in this world are to Family, Friends (Few out of the many) and if it wasn't for my fam my car would be numero uno on the list. A car never dick you over and make you feel the way a bad situation can with a friend or lover. I'm not afraid to take a chance either with a girl I just am very cautious/picky which ever you prefer. As man once told me "Tread lightly in life because you never who's following your footsteps" IMO ~ or how stable the ground is ahead of you.

Muscletang · #15 10-14-2006, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jcsaleen

I said Fuck this shit why am I obsessing over one being out of the 6 Billion out there.

There are only 3 billion women though...

It's ok, we here at AF have known about your "swinging on both sides of the plate" for a while now. It's ok, you're still a highly respected member, to some, around here.

And don't worry about telling your parents because...I think they already know.

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