Men's Rules when it comes to woman..

[Jimmiz71]

My Girlfriend Just sent this to me.. It gave me a chuckle .. Sorry if its a repost..
-Jimmy

Men's Rules When it Comes to Woman


1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

3. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

4. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
that way.

5. Crying is blackmail.

6. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

7. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

8. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

11. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
to act like soap opera guys.

12. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

14. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
done. Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

18. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine...Really.

22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

23. You have enough clothes.

24. You have too many shoes.

25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

26. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

[StewieL]

VERY old, but always worthy of a repost from time to time. The truth never "really" gets old

[CivRacer95]

This has just been bookmarked. I think I'll make a poster out of it and post it up at the apt. I've never read it before and it was by far the funniest thing I have ever read. Thank you. Thank you...

[thecackster]

Speaking of which, do you girlfriends ask what you think of a car, then get all rolly eyed and frustrated when you go into detail?

[Ace$nyper]

never will be old lol

my hubby tells me some of tha same things

[Officer Redneck]

As a man who has been married for nearly 8 years.











But I would never let my wife read that. My couch isn't that comfortable.

lol I dont give my man tha plesure of tha couch lol

[deadbolt_35]

my girlfriend has to read this, with numbers 7, 10 and 13 all highlighted...the night on the couch will be well worth it

[imtheoneandonlyD]

Originally Posted by thecackster

Speaking of which, do you girlfriends ask what you think of a car, then get all rolly eyed and frustrated when you go into detail?

I love that my gf actually knows something about cars.

[thecackster]

I have that printed on a 22x36 in. paper hanging in my appartment

[speeddemonGtV6]

ooh man good stuff never read that b4

[jcsaleen]

Originally Posted by Jimmiz71

5. Crying is blackmail.

Lmao!

[Rally Sport]

Man that list is too true, especially the Christopher Columbus part. Thats me, trying to find a short cut to the spice islands then ending up no where we want to be.

[240NIZ]

All women should memorize it, so that way all we have to do is say the number.

Watching T.V.:

Her: Honey, do you know where...
Me: 15 15 15 15 15 15.....