Don’t forget to read the instructions….

[Spec2 Girl]

The following are real instructions from products:

On a blanket from Taiwan:
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.
(Bugger, what am I gonna use now???)

On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists:
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.

On a Taiwanese shampoo:
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink:
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

On a New Zealand insect spray:
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.

In an American guide to setting up a new computer:
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP
TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins:
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?

On an American Sears hairdryer:
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips:
COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter's special!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of thebox):
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(Too late! You lose!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
(As opposed to use in outer space?)

On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.
(Now I'm curious!)

On British Sainsbury's peanuts:
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I'm glad they cleared that up.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

On a Canadian child's Superman costume -
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.
(That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)

On some British frozen dinners:
SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:
FITS ONE HEAD.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

On a British Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

On a British Nytol Sleep Aid Tablets label:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.
(Duh!)

On British Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

Paint Stripper Heat Gun:
NOT TO BE USED AS A HAIRDRYER.

[darkness]

and on a Jetski:
Do not point jet at bodily orifices. (sorry mis-spelling)

(and I'm serious about that, I read it myself)



you've got to think of why things like that appear on products. there are people out there stupid enough to do it.

[NeoFreek]

My moms old hair dryer had a warning that said, "Do not use while going to the bathroom." and "For indoor use only." and "Do not use while showering."

Good ones. I always crack up when reading some of these weird instructions.

[Spec2 Girl]

Originally posted by darkness
you've got to think of why things like that appear on products. there are people out there stupid enough to do it.

I know, and that is a REALLY scary thought!!! :hehehe: I guess that’s how the Darwin awards got started!!!! :hehehe:

[YogsVR4]

My favorite is still whats on the last step of a ladder "STOP"

[jinushaun]

Amazingly, some people will actually sue if those labels aren't on there. Bloody lawsuit leeches!

[taranaki]

chainsaw vasectomy noooooooo!!!!

[NSX-R-SSJ20K]

On a New Zealand insect spray:
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.


insects aren't animals

[NSX-R-SSJ20K]

On British Sainsbury's peanuts:
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really?)


Its law num nuts

[NSX-R-SSJ20K]

On a British Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.


Mandatory it makes you drousey

[NSX-R-SSJ20K]

On a British Nytol Sleep Aid Tablets label:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.
(Duh!)

Its mandatory and it makes you tired after sleeping

On British Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

Thats mandatory too so that you don't get sued

Paint Stripper Heat Gun:
NOT TO BE USED AS A HAIRDRYER.

someone got sued and the company decided that not to let it happen again that they'd do this


its only because of other peoples stupidity it's completely logical i don't think this thread is very funny

[Firebird]

my personal favorite is the last one, can you seriously imagine someone doing that, that's got to hurt like a bitch they burn your hand if you even get close to them. I bet it drys hair fast though

[Firebird]

quote:
its only because of other peoples stupidity it's completely logical i don't think this thread is very funny

other peoples stupidity is funny, or at least I think so

[Neutrino]

Originally posted by Firebird


other peoples stupidity is funny, or at least I think so

You are absolutelly correct.

[ragt20]

old but funny......read it long time ago