The grasshopper and the ant

[BLU CIVIC]

OLD VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and

plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

---------------------------------------

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and

plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press

conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well

fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to

provide pictures of the shivering

grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a

table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can

this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer

so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and

everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house

where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome."

Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the

grasshopper's sake.

Tom Daschle & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Peter

Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper,

and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his

"fair share."

Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and

Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The

ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and,

having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is

confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a

defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel

of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent

welfare recipients.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last

bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just

happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he

doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the

house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize

the once peaceful neighborhood.


The moral of the story is: Vote Republican

[YogsVR4]

I do like the classics

[DGB454]

~

[2strokebloke]

You left out the part where the Ant who did all the hard work dies, and leaves all of his belongings to his son, who get's a divorce and his former wife uses his money to hire a lawyer so that she can obtain everything that his father worked so hard for.

[-GS-]

heh thats pretty good

[lazysmurff]

"the availability of a job for every hard working, able bodied american is one of the greatest myths of our society" -Michael Katz, poverty and welfare researcher and expert

nuff said

[Raz_Kaz]

Modern version was too goddamn long

[zebrathree]

Nice.

[lazysmurff]

the problem with this story is that, as stated above, it rides on the assumption that everyone in america can obtain a job, which is simply not the case.

[Toksin]

Funniest part was the gang of spiders.

[chaser29]

Hmmmm..

[CarSuperfreak]

Originally Posted by lazysmurff

the problem with this story is that, as stated above, it rides on the assumption that everyone in america can obtain a job, which is simply not the case.

Why not? if you think about what you do during the day, and the people you interact with, the places you go.....there are so many jobs out there, really. True it may not be a glorious job or your first choice, but anyone who has at least gotten a HS degree can get a job (amazing how there are so many jobless people, yet how nearly every high school student has a job, eh?)

[lazysmurff]

but thats simply not the case. your missing the obvious here....if there was always a job for everyone that was willing and able to get one, why would people be getting laid off all the time?

[CarSuperfreak]

there are still other jobs; other ways to make money as oppose to making to government pay for your life.

[lazysmurff]

i think its time i recommended some reading. its called "in the shadow of the poorhouse", by michael katz. its an easy, short read, and i think you'll find it quite informative.

i find arguing this topic with people who havent read about it and therefore believe whatever long held myths their parents pass down, very frustrating.