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  #1  
Old 02-05-2004, 05:39 PM
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Talking Martooni

A lady walks into a bar and says,'' Barkeep, gimme a martooni.'' The bartender goes back and fixes her a martini. She downs it and says, ''Barkeep, gimme another martooni.'' So he goes back and fixes her another martini. She downs that, and just sits there and doesn't say anything. Finally after about 10 minutes bartender says,'' Would you like another?'' She says,'' Oh, no, I got this terrible heartburn.''
The bartender says, ''Okay, there are three things wrong here:
Number 1: It's martini, not martooni.
Number 2: It's bartender, not barkeep, and
Number 3: You're not having heartburn, your boob's in the ash tray.''

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Old 02-05-2004, 05:59 PM
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Re: Martooni

nice s
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  #3  
Old 02-05-2004, 06:35 PM
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Bad mother-%#@*! joke
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Old 02-06-2004, 05:16 AM
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Re: Martooni

I normally wouldnt comment on a bad joke, but this one is too bad
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Old 02-06-2004, 07:55 AM
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Re: Martooni

I'm surprised the word "blonde" isn't anywhere in there.
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Old 02-06-2004, 08:03 AM
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Re: Re: Martooni

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Originally Posted by dayna240sx
I'm surprised the word "blonde" isn't anywhere in there.
hehe... i take it you dont like blond jokes
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Old 02-06-2004, 08:07 AM
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Re: Martooni

no, i dont mind them. not very much can offend me. It just sounded like a blonde joke.
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Old 02-06-2004, 08:25 AM
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Re: Re: Martooni

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Originally Posted by dayna240sx
no, i dont mind them. not very much can offend me. It just sounded like a blonde joke.


A blonde tried to fire an arrow into the air and she missed
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Old 02-06-2004, 08:32 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Martooni

Quote:
Originally Posted by quarter_mile
A blonde tried to fire an arrow into the air and she missed
What possessed you? Contender for Worst Joke Award. Ever
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Old 02-06-2004, 09:27 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Martooni

Quote:
Originally Posted by quarter_mile
A blonde tried to fire an arrow into the air and she missed
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Old 02-06-2004, 09:36 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Martooni

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I wish it were that easy
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Old 02-06-2004, 10:01 AM
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I have a problem...

I admittedly smiled at the arrow thing.

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Old 02-06-2004, 10:04 AM
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Re: Martooni

Quote:
Originally Posted by AcesHigh
I have a problem...

I admittedly smiled at the arrow thing.

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Old 02-06-2004, 10:15 AM
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Re: Re: Martooni

Quote:
Originally Posted by BP2K2Max
No, the redeeming factor here is that he recognises he has a problem. We'll help him to deal with it instead, hopefully he'll emerge a stronger and healthier person. We can only hope.
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  #15  
Old 02-06-2004, 10:37 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Martooni

Quote:
Originally Posted by crayzayjay
No, the redeeming factor here is that he recognises he has a problem. We'll help him to deal with it instead, hopefully he'll emerge a stronger and healthier person. We can only hope.
that's what they said about Mike Tyson
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