How to shower like a man/women

[TheNotoriousMogg]

too funny to not be a but



How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned
laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
make mental note to do more sit-ups

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth,
leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage
shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint with
natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial
scrub for 10 minutes until red.

9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and
jaffa cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

11. Shave armpits and legs.

12. Turn off shower.

13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex

14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of
a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown
and towel on head.

17. If you see husband along the way, cover up
any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of
the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife
along the way, shake
wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

3. Look in the mirrior, look at your wiener and
scratch your ass.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water
rinse them off.(nasty!)

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and
laugh at how loud they sound
in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and
surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt
hairs stuck on the soap.

11. Shampoo your hair.

12.. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pee.

14. Rinse off and get out of shower.

15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on
floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.

16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.

17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
light and fan on.

18. Return to bedroom with towel around your
waist. If you pass wife,
pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
'woo-woo'sound again.

19. Throw wet towel on bed.

Now tell me you didn't laugh at the truth.

[tonioseven]

All I have to say is: "Woo Woo!!!"

[racingbreed20]

That is so very true. Good humor is always needed.

[esp]

thats a good one darrell.

[stubacca]

Nice one... too damn true! Especially the 'woo-woo'

[Hyatus]

forgot the part that guys like to suck in stomach and flex muscles in mirror also

[ROB3000GTVR4]

That was a good 1 because it true

[Oz]

Actually, I'm the who has been on forums like these ones for as long as methusala and seen it all, done it all.

[TheNotoriousMogg]

Originally Posted by Oz

[Sean]

I've seen that a long time ago, but I havn't been able to find it. Thanks!

I'm always the first one to shower, that way I get all the hot water and the hairless soap.

[Jimster]

Nice!- very true I guess- Explains what wife does in that shower for so damned long

[grimmy]

that was f'in funny, i would like to extend my gratitude to you for posting that. thank you.

[99civic03]

What site was that off? Collegehumor? Ebaumsworld?

[Macro]

Originally Posted by TheNotoriousMogg

How To Shower Like a Man
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and
laugh at how loud they sound
in the shower.

Ah, I'm guilty on that account.