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  #1  
Old 08-04-2003, 12:36 PM
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The Civic/CRX Commandments

The CRX Commandments

As found on crx.honda-perf.org, with some modifications by myself.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yea, and though I walk in the valley of darkness, I shall fear no Plymouth Neon or RX-7, for mine is a righteous and holy car, for thus spaketh the Spirits to me from on high, saying...

Thou shalt discard thy stock airbox and lose thy restrictive air filter, for it is unholy. Thou shalt install an Advanced Engine Management intake. Thou shalt whooosh and roar.

Thou shalt remove thine stock exhaust, and ensconce it in thy holy shrine/garage. Thou shalt now smite thine enemies with thy custom exhaust, and weareth earplugs in thine ears. And thou shalt limp past the law, with thy noise and fury.

Thou shalt explore the outer limits of drifting, heel and toe and double-clutching. Thou shalt marvel that none dare tailgate thee.

Thou shalt install Hondata computer and kiss thy rev limiter and lean fuel map settings goodbye.

Thou shalt exorcise thy handling demons and cast down thy narrow Michelins, for they carry the Mark of the Beast. Thou shalt empty thy savings upon Eibachs, swaybars, strut braces, and modify thy stock alignment, and revel in tire wear. Thou shalt remain joyous whilst jostling thine innards upon every road imperfection. Thou shalt not early-apex and understeer.

Thou shalt void thy warranty, that the evil minions of the foul CC dealers shall not besmirch thy doors with dings, overfilleth thine oil sump, ruin thy bolts or warpeth thy rotors with over-tightening.

Thou shalt wax thy CRX annually, for Evil's minions live deep within the body.


Thou shalt install 4 point harnesses, and roll-cage. Thou must not visit early due to rollover.

Thou shalt purchase a HASport motor-mount, for thine is too meek. Thou shalt marvel at the ease of installation. Thou must have pristine tool collection.

Thou shalt install Green Stuff brake pads upon thy stock calipers, mounted over Fastbrakes immense rotors, so that they may give forth their fruits more quickly. Thou shalt pray and asketh for warped rotors nevermore.

Thou shalt feed thy 4 cylinders well that they might service thee better. Thou shalt revel in the power of premium gasoline. Thou shalt visit a gas station less often than thy cylinder-laden brethren.

Thou shalt quest for the likes of a Turbo, and someday installeth one under thine hood. Thou shalt revel in the exlaimation of thy blow off valve.

Thou shalt run unholy (just this once) boost levels. And thus thou shalt humiliate thine enemies, both at the track and in the streets.


Thou shalt lose thy air conditioning, carpeting, sound deadening, and all extra weight. Thou shalt become compulsive about this. Thou shalt seek professional counseling.

Thou shalt not remove thy passenger seat, for thou needeth a driving instructor. Thy horsepower is now mighty.

And lastly.....
Let us pray,
that Thou shalt not ever covet thy neighbor's S2000.
Amen.
(and Amen)
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The name's Adrian
1990 Civic HB Si - 265.7whp/223tq @9.2psi. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 296.3whp/230tq @1bar. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 185.8whp/139tq. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
2006 G35 Coupe 6MT - Stock
2011 CR-Z - Stock
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  #2  
Old 08-04-2003, 07:51 PM
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Stable Of Cars I have Owned:
1991 Honda CRX
1990 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme
2003 Honda Accord
1998 Chrysler Concorde
2007 Honda Civic
1997 Toyota Camry
1995 Saturn SC2
1996 Ford Taurus
1991 GMC Sierra
2002 Daewoo Leganza
1999 Dodge Ram
2007 Honda CR-V
2003 BMW 325i
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  #3  
Old 08-04-2003, 08:08 PM
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glad someone commented...i thought it was funny.....need to remove that stickie about cf hoods for 4-doors and put this up there
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The name's Adrian
1990 Civic HB Si - 265.7whp/223tq @9.2psi. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 296.3whp/230tq @1bar. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 185.8whp/139tq. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
2006 G35 Coupe 6MT - Stock
2011 CR-Z - Stock
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  #4  
Old 08-04-2003, 08:19 PM
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Ahmen!
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Old 08-04-2003, 08:19 PM
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they forgot something.

Thou shalt not tune thine DX motor.
Thou shlat do an engine swap.
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Old 08-04-2003, 08:33 PM
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Yeah and add the STD engine to that as well Melt....
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Old 08-04-2003, 08:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by jackacc
Yeah and add the STD engine to that as well Melt....
haha thats what i shoulda put in the first place .... 70hp .... lol.
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:45 AM
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Nice One! We should compile this and make it mandatory that it be placed in the glovebox of each 4th gen! lol

I think it's appropriate that we add something like...

"Thou shalt not besmirch nor defile thyself with the likes of neon undercarriage lights or the mark of the heathen idols of "APC"...

I think that would about finish it off.

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  #9  
Old 08-05-2003, 12:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by 4GZChatch
or the mark of the heathen idols of "APC"...
oops ... oh well at least it aint on there anymore ... and i never put the huge windshield banner on ... just little winder stickers
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:51 AM
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Hey, I have no hate for you, I have owned APC product before, we just have to progress in our modifying, right? on me. (can you say open mouth insert foot!?)
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Remember: You can't spell Crap without APC!

Classic SE-R
GTi-R turbo setup
3" DP
U12 modified ECU
Hyperco GenII suspension
Progress sway
SAFC
etc. etc.
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  #11  
Old 08-05-2003, 12:52 AM
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Ha ha nice list.
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:53 AM
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yea i had some other stupid shit too ... fake bullet holes, jap letters,

all gone now though
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  #13  
Old 08-05-2003, 08:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Melt
yea i had some other stupid shit too ... fake bullet holes, jap letters,

all gone now though
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The name's Adrian
1990 Civic HB Si - 265.7whp/223tq @9.2psi. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 296.3whp/230tq @1bar. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
1991 Civic Sedan DX - 185.8whp/139tq. Tuned on NepTune by J.Mills
2006 G35 Coupe 6MT - Stock
2011 CR-Z - Stock
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  #14  
Old 08-05-2003, 04:38 PM
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whats wrong with underbody neons? Some cars do look good with them if they are done right(can't see the tube)
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Old 08-05-2003, 04:43 PM
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Thou shalt not hesitate to do MPFI swap on blue 4 door civic with SOHC ZC engine
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