Venus VS Mars (READ)

[Oz]

> >I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women
> > differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus
> > thing. And, I never have figured out why men think with their head and
> > women with their heart. And, I never yet have figured out how the
> > sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears
> > the words "I do."
> >
> >One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
> > passion starts to heat up, we start touching, feeling and I am thinking
> > tonight is a green light!!!! Then out of no where she says, "I don't
> > feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
> >
> >I said, "WHAT? ? "
> >
> >So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads.
> > She explains that I must not be in tune with her emotional needs as
> > a Woman. I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally realize
> > that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to bed.
> >
> >The very next day we went shopping at a big department store. I walked
> > around while she tried on three very expensive outfits. She couldn't
> > decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three of them. She
> > then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each to which I
> > say OK. And then we go to the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set of
> > diamond earrings. Let me tell you . . . she was so excited. She must
> > have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't
> > think she cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis
> > bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis. I think I threw her for
> > a loop when I told her that it was OK.
> >
> >She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you should have
> > seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash
> > register."
> >
> >I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No, honey. I don't
> > feel like buying all this stuff now. " You should have seen her face
> > . . . it went completely blank. I then said, "Really honey! I just want
> > you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just when she had this look
> > like she was going to kill me, I added, "You must not be in tune with
> > my financial needs as a Man."
> >
> >I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during the spring
> > thaw 2005.


This is one of the funniest things I have read in ages...

[Toksin]

fucking ROFLMAO!!!!


Classic find Grant!!



note to the ladies: We aren't all like that

[tomlong]

I am definately going to try this. Maybe even today.

[Shortbus]

That gets a 5 out of 5 lols.

[endlesskev86]

lol what with u and sex Oz?? lol....first it was the Sexual Oragmi ...now this!! lol

[Oz]

Originally posted by endlesskev86
lol what with u and sex Oz?? lol....first it was the Sexual Oragmi ...now this!! lol

You were born in '86. I'll tell you when you're older. :finger:

[endlesskev86]

Originally posted by Oz



You were born in '86. I'll tell you when you're older. :finger:

lol
dun worry.........we HAD sex education already!:hehe:

[Sean]

AHASHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG LOL... THATS GREAT.

[tonioseven]

Funny and very ingenious! I'm almost tempted to try it but.....












I don't like sleeping on the couch!

[crab]

Originally posted by endlesskev86


lol
dun worry.........we HAD sex education already!:hehe:

Oz covers topics that aren't part of the normal sex education curriculum i.e. real life stories versus textbook examples :hehehe:

[450HPviper]

real life stories versus textbook examples

Oz should become a teacher. Just a thought.

[SiRI]

Originally posted by tonioseven
I don't like sleeping on the couch!

Very funny Oz, where do you get all these??

[YogsVR4]

Absolutely classic!

[lordvektra]

Originally posted by 450HPviper


Oz should become a teacher. Just a thought.

those who cant do, teach