Blonde joke

[spaminator]

three blondes are on an island and can't find a way off. They find a lamp rub it blah blah blah they each get one wish. 1st one says, "i wish i was 10x smarter than i am now" so she turns into a brunette and swims across safely to the mainland. 2nd one says, "I wish i wa 10x smarter than her". so she becomes a redhead builds a raft and rows to the mainland. 3rd one says, "well i wish i was 100x times smarter than both of them combined" so she turns into a man looks at a map and walks across the bridge

[Nicole8188]

What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?
They know how many men went down on the Titanic

Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
Because they can't even keep two calves together

[drewh4386]

A young man wanted to get his beautiful "blonde" wife
something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he
decides to buy her a cellphone.

She is all excited, she loves her phone. He shows her and
explains to her all the features on the phone. The next day
the blonde goes shopping.

Her phone rings and it's her husband, "Hi hun,"he says "how
do you like your new phone?"

She replies: "I just love, it's so small and your voice is
clear as a bell! But there's one thing I don't understand
though."

"What's that, baby?" asks the husband.

"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"

[Franko914]

Originally Posted by drewh4386

A young man wanted to get his beautiful "blonde" wife
something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he
decides to buy her a cellphone.

She is all excited, she loves her phone. He shows her and
explains to her all the features on the phone. The next day
the blonde goes shopping.

Her phone rings and it's her husband, "Hi hun,"he says "how
do you like your new phone?"

She replies: "I just love, it's so small and your voice is
clear as a bell! But there's one thing I don't understand
though."

"What's that, baby?" asks the husband.

"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"

Hahahahaha! Dumb b*tch...

Next time, try changing it to something like "How did you know I was at your best buddy's place?"

[Franko914]

A beautiful young blonde in Sydney was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself from the Harbour Bridge. She went down to the bridge and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tittering on the edge of the bridge, crying.

He took pity on her and said, "Look, you have so much to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day."

Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy."

The young lass thought for a moment, then nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Europe would give her life new meaning.

That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her sandwiches, a piece of fruit, some wine and they made passionate love until dawn.

Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the ship's captain. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "He feeds me, he screws me, and I get a trip to Europe."

The captain says, "He's certainly screwing you. This is the Manly Ferry."

[spaminator]

excellent. I've heard something like it before but i forgot. What's the differenc between a blonde and a mosquito?




a mosquito will stop sucking when you slap it

[drewh4386]

An exhausted looking blond dragged herself in to the doctor's office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can't get a wink of sleep."

"I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over."

"Great," the blond answered, "I'll try anything. Let's give it a shot."

A few weeks later the blond returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc, your plan is no good. I'm more tired than before!"

"I don't understand how that could be", said the doctor, shaking his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!"

"That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I'm still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it's hard getting him to swallow the pill!"

[Franko914]

Originally Posted by drewh4386

..."That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I'm still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it's hard getting him to swallow the pill!"

Hahahaha! Dumb b*tch...