The Official AF "Quote" Thread

[Ran]

My big quote for this thread (take a deep breath, it's not short folks):

Originally Posted by softcore

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been having an affair. The usual signs. Phone rings, I answer, someone hangs up. She started going out 'with the girls' a lot recently although when I ask which girls it is always "Just some friends from work, you don't know them". I always look out for her taxi coming home but she always walks down the drive although I can hear a car setting off. As if she has got out of the car round the corner. Why? Is it not a taxi? I once picked her mobile up just to see what time it was and she went beserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my girlfriend. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth but last night she went out again and I decided to check on her. I decided I was going to hide behind my car which would give me a view of the whole street so I could see which car she gets out of. It was while I was crouched down behind my car that I noticed rust around my rear wheel well.

Should I take it into a body repair shop or should I buy some stuff from the local auto shop and try to repair it myself?

Don't tell me you expected that...

[2.2 Straight six]

Originally Posted by softcore

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been having an affair. The usual signs. Phone rings, I answer, someone hangs up. She started going out 'with the girls' a lot recently although when I ask which girls it is always "Just some friends from work, you don't know them". I always look out for her taxi coming home but she always walks down the drive although I can hear a car setting off. As if she has got out of the car round the corner. Why? Is it not a taxi? I once picked her mobile up just to see what time it was and she went beserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my girlfriend. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth but last night she went out again and I decided to check on her. I decided I was going to hide behind my car which would give me a view of the whole street so I could see which car she gets out of. It was while I was crouched down behind my car that I noticed rust around my rear wheel well.

Should I take it into a body repair shop or should I buy some stuff from the local auto shop and try to repair it myself?

i don't think it's the girl he should be worried about cheating.

[Rally Sport]

Originally Posted by 2.2 Straight six

i don't think it's the girl he should be worried about cheating.

Yeah I thought that was gunna be the funny thing about the quote.. im glad im not the only person who noticed that.

[quteasabutton]

Originally Posted by Rally Sport

Yeah I thought that was gunna be the funny thing about the quote.. im glad im not the only person who noticed that.

hehe yeah. please tell me someone called him on that in w/e thread that came from..

[blazee]

Originally Posted by quteasabutten

hehe yeah. please tell me someone called him on that in w/e thread that came from..

Life changing decision - Your advice needed

[quteasabutton]

Originally Posted by [email protected]

I am not sure if I have a wreckless driving record or not. And I am worried that it will exclude me from the sales positions I am applying for where a clean driving record is required.

typos always make for some fun reads

[2.2 Straight six]

I don't have sex dreams. i just have sex.

one of my friends on the subject of sex dreams. and those times when you say too much.

i found it funny..

[79Bandit]

Originally Posted by Hypsi87

OK this race happend about a week ago. I have been waiting to post it hoping I could find someone who video taped it but... I can't. so here it goes.

As some of you know I have a few new goodies for the GN this summer.
Dual ball bearing TE-66. ported heads, ported intake, direct alcohol injection, Ice water to air intercooler.


Well here is the story....

I am in this intern program where I am at my internship for 8 weeks getting paid and then I am in classes for 8 weeks not getting paid(graduate in two weeks!!!) Well when I am in class, I worked for a dyno shop in Peoria IL. Well we have this really rich doctor in the area that just thows money at a new car every year. Last year he supercharged a z06 and this year it was a viper. Well I worked on the viper occoasionaly, put the roots blower on it, and some stuff here and their. It put 580 at the wheels.

Well his son... 17 year old kid, is the primary driver of these cars, we wil call him "silver spoon". I pulled up with the GN (after being in hibernation for a long time) and parked and I got out to say hi to some of the locals. Well as I was saying hi to a buddy of mine that had his new mach 1 out, "silver spoon" sends some 16 year old kid over to me asking if I was willing to put my GN up agenst his new STOCK viper..... I looked over and noticed the car. Stock my ass were the words out of my mouth..

Well I walk over there and he is leaning up agenst the car with his money grubing whore of a girlfriend.

Me: Don't piss down my back and tell me it's rain, who are you trying to kid this thing is stock?
Him: What? I just got this car.
Me: You mean you daddy just got this car back from the dyno shop.
Him: *blank look*
Me: I work up there little fella, I know what you have. I dynoed it.
Him: Well I always hear about you Buick, still think you have the balls to run with a boosted v-10
Me: You don't even have to ask that question.


We head out to the boon docks and we get lined up. His car sit's with 590 HP 8 PSI stock tires/suspension with a 17 year old driver. Mine sits with 520 HP 27 PSI ET drags (LOL slicks RULE) and a few suspension goodies.

Anyway we burned out and we are lined up and ready to go, we have a flagger in the middle of us and about 15 cars on each side. I am sitting on the brake with 13 PSI on the gauge waiting to be unleashed on the pavement. the flags go up and I give her a little more fuel. Flag goes down and I LAUNCH with 16 PSI trying to tear the tires up but the slicks just grab. The car starts to veer off to the left a bit and I try to countersteer but the front end is sooo light, the car will not turn. Meanwhile "Silver Spoon" is back there in that monster viper just tryin his little heart out. I was accually suprised by how well the viper hooked up, he kept me within two car lengths the whole race. When it was over, he simply picked up his sorry excuse for a GF and just told me in the most sinister voice a pretty rich boy can have. "Just enjoy it while you can, wait untill we get the smaller pulley and more boost." My reply was "OK tell you dad to call us when he gets it, I will put it on for him." After that he just drove away.

the morale of the story is.... Traction is the key. Spend some money on suspension and tires.


I should go paint a pair of fangs on the fenders of the GN

was just surfing around and some how came across that hypsi was a great funny guy wish i could of known him better.

[twospirits]

Members:

This thread will be heavily monitored and I will remove any quotes which flame members or moderators. As well as useless banter. It is only to post up your favorite quote.

TS out

[2.2 Straight six]

I think i may have the world's only truck that has a clutch-less gearbox, with a clutch...

my friend, commenting on his truck's new gearbox.

[2.2 Straight six]

Originally Posted by Rally Sport

Nothing wrong with wanking 10 times a day..

speaks for itself.

[666_speed]

Originally Posted by twospirits

Talking about the classifieds section and the post about finding some lug nuts.


TS out

To clear that up, it was edited by cuda_dude.

[goldz28]

Quote:
Originally Posted by FormulaLT1
Dude I go on the internet trust me I could find porn and as for getting a woman I don't know what I'm doing wrong , I think woman don't thinks its sexy when I email them sexy naked pictures of me in a tub of jello. Go figure


You need to read the whole thing here is the link to the thread

parts are real funny http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbul...2&page=4&pp=15

[goldz28]

Everyone is talking about drunken moments

Originally Posted by FormulaLT1

Not drunken, but I once slept walked into my Grandfathers room while we were staying over there one christmas and proceded to use his bed as a urinal while him and wife were sleeping.

[2.2 Straight six]

Originally Posted by twospirits

Okay I admit, what the guy did is stupid (riding a bike without a helmet), but to be honest, whats more stupid is that the state he lives in does not have a law saying you have to wear a helmet. That is the most stupidest thing I've heard.

TS out

smooth...