Angry

[TexasF355F1]

Not really sure what to think anymore. I'm lucky now if I get at least 6 hours of sleep every night. Last night it just seemed clearer of what the inevitable may be. My roomate is pretty much disliked by all of our long time friends now b/c of lieing and talking shit and doing this such as I mentioned earlier. Last night they were all up here and so I went out with them. Come home around midnight drunk as hell, and the chick is back. I'm really not tired enough to go to sleep so I decide to go over there. Walk in, my roomate's sitting next to her on the couch. No big deal really, but something about it just bothered me. Then they go outside and smoke. They always, either one of them ALWAYS say hey come outside. Not this time. So I get up go home, get fucked up even more to test my roomate. Normally if I was gone more than 5 or 10 minutes he would be like whats the deal come hang out.

20 minutes later he comes in doesn't say anything, and grabs a beer. Then on his way out, didn't even peep in my room, says hey come over. Sounded more like he was just saying it than meaning it. I go back over and chill for a while. No ones talking to me really, which is pretty unusual. Then she says hey lets have a cigarette and they go out to the front door and have one. I'm standing right there and neither of them say shit again. I just sit there playing on my phone and just say I'm passing out and jet inside. My roomate comes in like 3 minutes later locks up and wakes me up to come hang out.

He all the sudden stands up and is like I'm going to bed, I can hardly stand. I know he puts on a show every time he's drunk. It's obvious. He pretends to fall or stammer a bit, but yet can grab a glass out of the cabinet without hesitation and turn on the faucet like a piece of cake. I'm sorry but if you are that fucked up you have a hard time doing those things. I know b/c I've been that drunk before. If you can't stand or hardly walk, you have a hard time doing anything.

I would like to say something, but since I have no proof I have no basis to bring it up. But b/c I'm so derainged I check his cell phone every day several times a day to see who he's calling. Or any text messages that may clue me in to something. The feeling of betrayl is so strong it makes me sick. I just hope that if it happens or when it happens it's soon. I know if something happens hell try and pull a fast one on me. But I know how he works so it would be very hard for anything to get passed me.

The only positive thing that's come out of this is I see who I can trust completely now. It also has made me reestablish my faith. I've been praying a lot lately, and even have gone to church during the day just to sit and pray and think. It's amazing how calming walking into a church can be. I just hope all of this ends soon so I can move on with my life and leave this behind.

[Genopsyde]

I think it's time to cut them both off, neither one is really your friend. I honestly couldn't live like that.

[TexasF355F1]

Originally Posted by Genopsyde

I think it's time to cut them both off, neither one is really your friend. I honestly couldn't live like that.

Yea. I woke up yesterday, and felt not happy, but just like I dont care anymore. If it happens i'll worry about it then and tell him what i think of him and seperate myself from the situation.

I also started realizing that more things actually annoy me about her more than anything. She's not the same person I met a few months ago in other words. And I met a chick this weekend, who I'm not attempting anything, but if something feels right she'd be cool to date. She loves baseball! That's whats got me keepin' an eye on here. HAHA

[sofriendly]

sorry people, i probably should not post cause i did not read entire thread, but man i think you need to let it go, looks like another love tko (judging from first post). we treat these words so lightly; friend, love, i'm drunk. I mean maybe this guy is not your friend, so what. It takes time to trust people, you will have to fight the hard fight. This goes with love also, maybe you were infactuated with the girl, and wanted to procreate. This is natural for young men (i can not speak for the ladys, sorry) to feel overwhelming feelings and mistake them for love or even like. Take your time and focus on the important things like school, family, and money. Most important, if you feel drunk dont drive.

[TexasF355F1]

Well like i basically pointed out in my above thread, I'm over and done with worry about anything. I'm not worried about it anymore. I can't stay in depressed mode forever. Now I'm pretty much back to normal, just with a new perspective on things.