Is Your Child a Goth

[Hobbes]

I am so getting me a box now!!!!

I fall at least 13-15 on that list. Yep, I'm going to hell...

[comingbackdown]

Originally Posted by nismogt_rfreak

I just thought this was the stupidest thing:

Is Your Child a Goth?
Presented by St. Mary's Church

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counseling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child.

-Frequently wears black clothing.
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
-Wears excessive black eye makeup,lipstick or nail polish.
-Wears any odd silver jewelry or symbols.
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
-Takes drugs.
-Drinks alcohol.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.(This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
-Complains of boredom.
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
-Is excessively awake during the night.
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
-Misbehaves at school.
-Misbehaves at home.
-Eats excessively or too little
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Chocula cereal is an example of this.
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
-Expresses an interest in sex.
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

If this is right, than every teenager in america is a goth.

I wear band t-shirts.
I'm listen to metal occasionally, and I "violently shake my head" to it.
I play RPGs, and I have almost every 007 game ever made.
I watch "corrupted media sources".
I insist on spending time with my friends without being accompanied by an adult.
I sleep too little.
I'm awake excessively at night. Like, all night.
I spend a large amount of time alone.
Do they consider metal, rock, hip-hop, alt-rock, emo, etc. "Antisocial" genres of music?
I also drink on occasion.

Wow. That's ten. Oh no! I must be a goth.

I may be quite devout in my religion, but... wow...
This is religion going toooooooo far.
If you look goth, act goth, etc. You're a goth. Half the crap on that list is common practice among teens, and adults too! Half of the population of the world are goths! We're being invaded! (isn't sarcasm just fun as all get out? )

Whoever wrote that list needs to find something to do with their time other than waste it.

[drunken monkey]

hell...
i'm a devil worshipper and i do none of those.
i'm even in church every sunday picking up all them nice young catholic virgins.

[thecackster]

wow...ha...thats all i can say, i'm laughing too hard.

[nismogt_rfreak]

I fit around 20 of those

I'm also shocked that they're dissing on Count Chocula, yet they're giving that asshole Boo Berry a free ride.

[Damien]

The last one is the major one off. Goth people don't claim to be goth or else they'd be like everyone else......

[KustmAce]

I got 29