Girls are hard to read sometimes...

[speedphreak]

In 3rd grade I knew this girl. I had a huge crush on her. We car-pooled every day and we lived in the same neighborhood. Fast forward to today....My parents bought a house in North Carolina. The girl has had a house here for like 15 years with her parents. I had no idea about this because I haven't seen her in like 15 years. Now, we are both up here, I just saw her for the first time 2 days ago since the 3rd grade. This girl is adorable. I think I am automatically in the friend zone because our parents are all very close and all. Personally I don't think I have a chance with her, but I don't know. I don't have a crush on her now, but I do think she is extremely cute. Then again, if anything did happen I think it would be kind of weird in a way...but i would very much like it to happen "whatever it might be". Like tonight, we had dinner with our parents, I gave her mom a hug and what not good bye, and it came to the daughter. We both looked at each other and said calmly, "bye, have a good night." After that, I had a vibe that we both wanted to hug good-night but it just didn't happen...it was kind of like a moment thing. I just don't know.

-Chris

[Toksin]

"sometimes" ??

[2.2 Straight six]

don't get into a relationship because you think someone's cute. that's superficial. be in a relationship with someone when you love them (and they love you.)

simple as that, to me anyway.

[speedphreak]

Toksin-Thats great. As for the cute comment. I meant cute as all around. Cute doesn't always mean "looks". Shes an all around cute girl I think. Thats all. I have gone out with girls because I thought they were "hot". Not a great idea at all.

-Chris

[beef_bourito]

meh, go for it man, better to try for it and fail than to regret not at least trying.

[mike@af]

15 years is a long time. My ex and I broke up 6 years ago. We were became friends, then we split apart completely. Didnt see each other for four years. When we saw each other again we almost got back together. Our parents were good friends, and still are today.

What I'm saying is people change over time. You may have a chance. Just because your parents are friends doesnt make it awkward.

[TigersClaw]

I can understand how this would be a confusing situation as I myself have encountered a situation similar to this.

My best advice to you would be not to let the relationship you had in the past dictate the relationship you may have right now and maybe longer (friendship, dating, whatever) because it's the past. Don't let the relationship your parents and her parents have dictate how your relationship with this girl goes, because that's their relationship. Do you get what I'm trying to say?

Anyway, if you think the girl is cute and would like to get to know her more, ask her to do something with you (movie,putt-putt, picinic, etc.) and go from there. This will show her you'd be interested in being more than friends but don't want to jump right out and say "hey, we need to be boyfriend and girlfriend." Or at least that's my take on it.

Anyway, best of luck to you man. And one more thing, just believe in yourself, because no matter what you do one way or the other here, if you don't believe in yourself, she'll notice it. You have to believe in yourself before she will believe in you.

[ghostrx7]

good advice, and definately have a plan of attack. im in a wierd situation like that now, and we've hung out so many times, and had so many awkward moments that i believe hooking up now is out of the question. ask her out, and if she says yes, b sure to kiss her or hold her hand, or whatever it takes to let her know u dont wanna b in the "friend zone"

[speedphreak]

Well, she asked me if I wanted to go white-water-rafting. I was like, "Yeah!". We are suppost to go on wednesday. Last night she came over with her family. We had a discussion about dating and such. I made some colorful comments that made her laugh, quite a bit. She told me I was very funny. Last night could of been the break I needed to "soften up to her". I felt so comfortable around her. She also insisted sitting next to me at dinner. I am not so sure how significant that it, but it must be a plus. What is your guys/gals take on this?


-Chris

[ghostrx7]

sounds promising, but i just went on a canoe trip with a few people and was miserable. might b a ruff first date! if u do a one day excurion you should b fine. those are fun. just dont make it a three day camping "lord of the flies" style trip like i just went on!haha

[speedphreak]

Haha.....No, just 1 day. She is making the reservations. I'm not sure if this is considered a "date" per say. We will see. But you see, I don't know how to go about asking if she does in fact have any interest in me. We also might be going on a hike tomorrow. She also seemed to be impressed with my photography/photoshop skills. I don't know how that would play into anything. Everything just seems so right. I am still very lost. I really like this girl, and after last nights festivities, I am comfortable around her. Before I was extremely nervous around her, because it has been such a long time since I have seen her. I am thinking maybe last night broke the ice between us, at least I think so. Thoughts?

-Chris

[Toksin]

Just hang out with her and see how things go, if it starts to look like it might be getting more serious, just ask her "so what's gonna happen with us?"

Worked for me.

err, for 5 months anyway

[speedphreak]

Toksin- What are the signs of "getting more serious?" When I don't see her, we talk online most of the time. I have a feeling now, if I ask her that...she will look at me like I have 3 heads!

-Chris

[vinnym86]

simple answer to this: try it out. Just ask her if you could take her to a dinner and a movie. don't ask if she wants to, ask her if you could take her. if yes, its a date. work on it from there, see if you build up anything, if you see urself going out with her more often, if you see urself getting closer. If she says no, just be cool, and keep being friendly, and don't get too dissappointed... afterall, you did say you don't have a crush on her now.
goodluck.

[speedphreak]

Thats a great idea! I'll ask her if I could take her out when we go rafting. When would be the best time to pop the question? This is the last week we will both be here. Then we both go back to school. We go to different schools, both in Florida though. I think if we both develope feelings for each other, it won't matter.....its not like shes going to California or anything. We will see.

-Chris