Toyota keeps sending bluetooth PLAY signal to iphone

[tmcdanel]

2014 Rav4 XLE - iPhone 7+ iOS 14.6

When i start my car, the bluetooth links up with my iphone and loads contacts. - Normal

But it immediately sets it to "play" and what ever audio application, say a podcast, was last playing on my cellphone will begin to play. - Annoying

So i press "pause" to shut it up, because i want to use Maps.
If i load an address into Google Maps and press start, i can hear the Australian lady give me directions. - Good

But if i can't hear her and i turn up the volume, the previous app, the Podcast, begins to play again and it's Really loud now. So i press pause. Really Annoying
Every time i change the volume the podcast starts playing again. i can press pause, but every time Maps app adjusts the route it triggers the playing of the podcast again. - Dangerously Annoying

i am getting older, and i have to reduce the "noise" around me to drive safely, focus on my driving, especially when i am dealing with an unfamiliar location. i absolutely don't want a podcast, or music, or audiobook... periodically shouting at me.

i tried loading a podcast app to play but turned off its cell data access, so it can't download anything. Now there is nothing to play in the background. Unfortunately, iphone iOS is so smart, it moves to the next app that has something downloaded to play. Toyota's 2014 bluetooth application and iPhone iOS 14 seem incompatible.

Is there a control or work around to prevent other apps, besides Maps, from loading up and playing?