How to wash your cat

[Raz_Kaz]

Originally Posted by dayna240sx

every car guy i know likes cats more than dogs

Well then now you know some car guys that hate cats. They're useless, they act as if they own you...I just feel like kicking the shit outta the cat, but I dont mind them, justy wuoldnt buy them

[TheNotoriousMogg]

They are useless and they shit in a smelly box which they don't even attempt to clean afterwards, atleast with some dogs after they shit they try and eat it...atleast they make the effort of cleaning up after themselves

[Raz_Kaz]

/\ My dog is scared shitless from his own...shit. I find it amusing how dumb my dog is which equals to hours of great wentertainment

[Oz]

Originally Posted by TheNotoriousMogg

They are useless and they shit in a smelly box which they don't even attempt to clean afterwards, atleast with some dogs after they shit they try and eat it...atleast they make the effort of cleaning up after themselves

Do us all a favour and give it a try yourself, Daz.

[Boss San]

I can't stress enough about the importance of keeping your pussy good and clean.
Why are so many people reffering to cats as "gay." I've never heard of a gay cat.
Altohugh I have seen a dog fuck a goat .
Tell me which one you'd rather have now.

[TheNotoriousMogg]

Originally Posted by Oz

Do us all a favour and give it a try yourself, Daz.

Try eating my own shit?, nice attempt at pawning your fetish off on me

[publicenemy137]

I'd rather just hose my cat down clean instead of going through all that trouble. My cat's claws are so sharp that the little scratch on me will result in a big swelling area with my skin n blood protruding out where the scratch is. I love it but hate it at the same time. It's an arrogant lil bastard who pretends to not notice us, but other times very affectionate and very cute. Though at night if I leave my door open, it likes to hop on my damn stomach at 3 in mornin while I am asleep, sometimes I'll scream and wake everyone up because when you see a lil dark thing right on you, you tend to get shocked when you just had a nightmare. I don't want to keep it (it's actually a neighbor's cat that just started hangin out at our place) but my sister loves it so much and she gives it so much attention it doesn't want to leave

[Steel]

There's an easier way: put some toilet bowl/cat cleaner in the toilet, throw the cat in, close the lid and sit on it, flush 3 or 4 times, then open.

[jajimo]

You know what they say, children who abuse animals are prone to becoming violent child-molestors or sexual offenders as adults.

Personally, I think owning a cat is a little less gay than abducting some kid on the play ground and "touching his naughty parts."

[-GS-]

I personally see no point in having a cat. The point of having a pet to me is so that it relies on me, and so that i can like play around wiith it and stuff. But a cat just sits there lazily or goes out and chases some damn birds and then comes back and goes to sleep. Its too independant to be a good pet

[jcz1987]

I have a cat. I have to clean him all the time because he is getting old (15 years old). My cat is used to it and never scratches or bites me.

[Toksin]

Cats rock. They are far more intelligent and better to have around than just a servant dog. Dogs have owners, cats have an equal relationship with you.

[jajimo]

Absolutely Toksin, not all of us require emotionally dependent pets to validate our evolutionary superiority.

[Toksin]

jajimo use big words brain hurt ow

[DevoutWankelist]

All of these supposed cat washing techniques have previously failed for me. Seeing as my cat is so generous with the distribution of scars, I've long since decided to be generous with his bathing. . .
The only way to bathe a cat without incurring serious injury to oneself is to-
A. Get a fishing pole with a lure on the end that prefereably has something "fluffy" (Don't skimp on fishing line, heavy duty line is very important)
B. Cast your line far enough away from yourself that your cat does not suspect your involvment.
C. Slowly jiggle your lure until your cat is fixated on it and begin reeling it in.
D. Don't get to excited and jerk it when he pounces, you must wait until he bites. Remember that if you just hook his paw he will get away.
E. Reel the little bastard in to about a 10 foot distance, if your cat is particulary evil you may want to allow another 5-10 ft but remember that this will make controlling him more difficult.
F. Now that you have him on the only leash he'll ever know drag his filthy flea ridden hide to the nearest pond and begin "bathing"
G. If all else fails and your cat is truly and absolutely the manifestation of the concept of evil, put tranquilizers in his food. Once he's out cold shoot him. Don't worry I know a really good taxidermist and can get you a discount. Bathing him should be really easy now, and you dont have to smell his litter box or feed him ever again!