so i know this guy....

[xokayxo]

i've known this guy for about five years. we went to high school together and the semester after we met i moved to california (from alaska which is where i met him). well after i graduated high school and came back to alaska we started hanging out again. it's been about two years that i've been back and about a week ago we started dating.

now let me get this part out of the way. this guy is awesome. hes funny, sweet, nice, charming, blah blah blah and everything every girl wishes they could have wrapped up into one guy. he's into jetskiiing, snowmachining, dirt biking, and manly things like that.

but this guy is such a fucking mushy bastard that i want to give him a mean ol' five-across-the-eyes. i feel like HE always feels like he has to be touching me or cuddling with me or looking at me but it really makes me sick. i will survive if he doesnt hold my hand when we're walking somewhere. i think i can make it if he doesnt put his head on my shoulder when we're sitting on the couch watching television. AND I REALLY think that i'll live to see another day if he doesnt try and make out with me every chance he gets. if i turn my head to the side to stretch my neck, he'll start rubbing my shoulders. GAHH!!! dont get me wrong - i am totally flattered that he feels that way towards me, but REALLY!!

so about a week ago i talked to him about this. i told him that he didnt have to be touching me all the time and if we were watching tv on the couch that he didnt have to cuddle with me. it's nice to be able to enjoy the company of another person and not be groping or groped by them. try it sometime! i also made it clear to him that i wasnt used to that sort of behavior (i.e.: cuddling, PDA, etc.) and he's still doing it.

and now that i think about it, i probably dont even really want or need to be dating someone at this point in time!!! [[way to go, kay! -- break as many hearts as you can.]] (see thread: "it's my turn...")

now, i am sure that there are many many guys that are members of this forum. pleeeeeeeeeease tell me what i can do to politely get him to stop being so touchy and cuddly with me without hurting his feelings!!

-kay

[sameintheend01]

show him the same amount of affection. it will make him stop. i promise.

[xokayxo]

i'll try to the point that i vomit.

but i still dont think that it would work. he's the naive kind of guy who would just think that, all of a sudden, i realized how madly in love with him i was and decided to reciprocate those actions of his which frustrate me so!

but thats a great idea.

it's brilliant! "drinking beer straight from a bottle? brilliant!!" (havent seen it? brilliant!)

[fredjacksonsan]

Serious reply:

Be straight up w/him. Tell him you dig him, but he's too mushy. Either tell him what's in your post, or show it to him.

Have you hooked up yet? It comes to mind that he may be acting that way if it hasn't happened. I don't want to know, just something for you to consider.

Comedic reply:

BTW, did you throw up yet and how did he take it?

Of course, if you've already decided you don't need/want to be going out with someone right now then why worry?

[Ridenour]

Wow, this douche sounds like a real needy wussbag, no offense. He's sounds like a major touchy-feely lost puppy. I think he's so touchy and feely and shit because he's afraid you might not like him, or he might lose you if he's not. If you don't want him to be all over you like that, I don't think telling him is really going to change it. Your best bet would be to just not respond / reject his advances when he tries to cuddle. Sit forward, pull back, ect. He'll get the picture that it makes you uncomfortable and that you don't like it - actions speak louder then words - he'll learn to not do it.

[xokayxo]

Originally Posted by fredjacksonsan

Serious reply:

Be straight up w/him. Tell him you dig him, but he's too mushy. Either tell him what's in your post, or show it to him.

Have you hooked up yet? It comes to mind that he may be acting that way if it hasn't happened. I don't want to know, just something for you to consider.

Comedic reply:

BTW, did you throw up yet and how did he take it?

Of course, if you've already decided you don't need/want to be going out with someone right now then why worry?

reply to Serious reply:

i told him he's too mushy and that he needs to stop a week ago (i said that in the initial post). last night i reminded him of what we talked about and he said "yeah, i remember." he then proceeded to put his head on my shoulder and start caressing my arm. hahaha. AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

and by "hooked up" do you mean "sex"? (wow, that was a hard word to type...)

reply to Comedic reply:
no vomiting as of yet. that might change this weekend, though. and i worry because he's a great friend; just, as Ridenour said, he's a "real needy wussbag."

[Cyprus106]

move away. and if he did that, you should have been like "this is exactly what i was talking about!" to him. And yes, hooked up = S E X!!