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| COMPLETELY off-topic Talk about anything other than cars. But you can't be mad and angry in this forum! |
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10-04-2001, 08:37 PM
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#1 | |
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Off playing with fire.
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
Posts: 10,371
Thanks: 22
Thanked 20 Times in 16 Posts
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If Dear Abbey was a man....
If Dear Abby was a man...
Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me. A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old collage roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him. A: Do it. Sperm can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day, then cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys. A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral on him. Then cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay. A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should - he should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral on him and cook him a nice meal. Dear Mr. Abby: Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep never giving me one. A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal. :hehe: . . . credit- someidiot |
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10-04-2001, 11:01 PM
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AF Enthusiast
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee
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Dame those ar funny, my wife doesn't like you no more but your my body!
Exactly what I was thinking, those are my 2 favorite things on earth! 
__________________
(I hear what you are saying but I feel you are lieing to me, would love to say to BUSH!) "Don't trip, skip, pinch your forehead"! 1988 CRX Si 2001 CBR 600F4i Silver & black FAST! 2004 Toyota Tundra (TRD) 2002 dodge grand caravan. |
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10-04-2001, 11:05 PM
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Off playing with fire.
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
Posts: 10,371
Thanks: 22
Thanked 20 Times in 16 Posts
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Quote:
Hehe, tell her I am really sorry :silly2: I am not really this way, honest. In fact, I am sure I will get razzed for this one, along with the other thread.  |
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10-04-2001, 11:29 PM
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AF Fanatic
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
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Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
Quote:
valkrie: you mean buddy right?
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L" |
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10-05-2001, 12:40 AM
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Master Connector
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Auckland
Posts: 11,781
Thanks: 95
Thanked 101 Times in 80 Posts
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Re: Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
Quote:
Those are very funny. Sounds a lot like a 1950s house wife training manual.
__________________
Connecting the Auto Enthusiasts
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10-05-2001, 12:43 AM
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Horizontally Opposed
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
Posts: 16,856
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Hehehe I'm going to print this out and leave it under the wife's pillow. :hehehe:
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10-05-2001, 01:05 AM
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Master Connector
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Auckland
Posts: 11,781
Thanks: 95
Thanked 101 Times in 80 Posts
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Quote:
Or are you just hoping for a good hot meal.
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Connecting the Auto Enthusiasts
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10-05-2001, 01:15 AM
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Horizontally Opposed
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
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10-05-2001, 05:58 AM
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"P-Man"
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Manawatu
Posts: 15,179
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Re: If Dear Abbey was a man....
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__________________
Current Build.....1/12 Scale Camaro......Almost finished!!!    View All My Models Here. |
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10-05-2001, 08:25 AM
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R.I.P. DAD 3/25/11
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Mount Vernon, New York
Posts: 6,253
Thanks: 10
Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
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__________________
Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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10-05-2001, 03:51 PM
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Pretty much amazing
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Fredericton
Posts: 3,764
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Quote:
__________________
 ec437 on grammar; Quote:
Quote:
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10-05-2001, 03:54 PM
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R.I.P. DAD 3/25/11
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Mount Vernon, New York
Posts: 6,253
Thanks: 10
Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
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Quote:
__________________
Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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10-05-2001, 04:10 PM
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AF Fanatic
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 5,677
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
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Quote:
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L" |
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10-05-2001, 04:16 PM
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Pretty much amazing
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Fredericton
Posts: 3,764
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
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Lucky You, I get to sit home, Tommorrow is going to be more interesting though. Going to the "races"
__________________
ec437 on grammar; Quote:
Quote:
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10-05-2001, 04:35 PM
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#15 | ||
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AF Fanatic
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 5,677
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Quote:
__________________
R.I.P. Lamont Coleman a.k.a. Big L -- 1975-1999 "Your ice don't shine an your chain hollow/ why you front in clubs for hours wit tha same bottle/ takin midget sips/ I run wit the richest clicks/ Tap the thickest chicks/ plus drop the slickest hits/ you know nothin about L/ so don't doubt L/ what's this muthafuckin rap game wit out L/ Yo that's like jewels wit out ice/ that's like china wit out rice/ or the holy bible wit out christ/ tha bulls wit out mike/ crack heads wit out pipes/ or hockey games wit out fights/ don't touch the mic if you aint able to spit/ flamboyant is tha label i'm wit.. muthafucka.... Big L" |
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