How to deal with parents

[zeff789]

My parents are extremely paranoid about me doing *anything* to my '96 Maxima. It took me quite a long time to convince them to let me remove the MAXIMA letters on my trunk..imagine how hard it was to get my intake But I was wondering if any of you have any suggestions or advice you could give me on how to let my parents lighten up about doin' stuff to my maxima

Thanks,
Jeff

[97wvmax]

my rents were the same way. im only 17 and theyve began to lighten up. wat kinda stuff r they sayin no to? like performance or cosmetics stuff? another good idea is jus start out small, i got my clearcorners and tint done first thing. and since i pay for it all they dont seem to car anymore. they dont really care that i do it myself anymore, they used to be real hardasses about that until i wired and bunch of stuff and believed that wat everyone on here is tellin me is right. one other way, get the stuff done and jus dont say anyhting to them till its done!:frog: :frog:

[mioku]

same here. my parents used to be on my case about that kind of stuff. so i just went out and did some stuff to my max anyway and after a while they just stoped caring. so i say just do what you want and maybe theyll just forget about it. if not then...just show a shaka!

[MaxPayne]

I think parent's biggest concern is that any modifications done to a car effectively reduce the value of the car. Also, they probably know that if you mod the car to go faster, they are going to figure you're going to drive it harder and potentially kill yourself with it.

The best way to convice parents is to show them that the mods you are doing are reversable (if they are), and show them that you are a responsible driver by not getting speeding tickets and not driving like a maniac around your neighborhood.

[Rich]

Some parents, (like my own) used to think that I would royally mess up the car when doing mods to it. They always used to think that I would mess up the engine, or the electronics in some way.

But like everyone has said so far, basically just start doin stuff and do it well. Take the time and care required so you dont make any screwups. When you buy a mod (performance or cosmetic), always read the instructions (I know the instructions are lame) before you try to install it. Soon enough they wont mind (or they just wont care) and then its all good

Most of all......have fun and dont worry too much. Modifying a car is expressing your personalty and everyone is slightly different

Enjoy

[Hey its antman]

I say do what they say because, I am a parent myself and they might take the car from you. I say find a buddy with the same kind of car or something simular to what you are doing. Bring him or her around they might get into it with you. Talk to your dad about stuff concerning the car. try to make everything yours and he's ideas. I didn't say make him your best friend but, Ask him what he thinks!! If you are real responsible about everything from taking the trash out to keeping your room straight. You should have no problem. try and get dad to some car shows of any kind. That will give him an introduction to what you are doing. Leave mom out of it unless she likes to get her hands dirty with car stuff!! Get a bunch of car magazines coming to the house and he will start to read them before he gives them to you. One of my biggest dream is too put a car together with my son or daughter. If I have to buy a car and just add rims for them we are on our way with everything else...LOL

If you are getting in trouble or being irresponsible then I agree with them. N O !!!!!! If you are a good kid you can do whatever you want. Son, just be safe.... The picture on the link is to much for you guys but I'm sure you have seen more than this.. youngins just be safe.Peace.......

[Paonessa]

Who here bought their own car and who's parent's bought it for them? If you parents paid for it then it's really their car and you just have permission to drive it. I paid for mine on my own two years ago so when i tell my parents about modifications it's just to make conversation, not to ask permission. i have a hard time believing you people are old enough to drive, but still have to ask parental permission for things. I'm outside every weekend washing my car by hand, doing the oil out in the driveway when necessary (even in November) banging out whatever mods i can handle myself. Just show them how much you love your car and then ask them "now why would i wanna fuck it up?" if that doesn't work, just do the mods if they don't like it tell them that you'll take it off if they pay. and don't keep any of the factory parts let them order it all new.

Hey antman, you may not believe it, but the day after i had my exuast my mom took my car out for a joyride before i woke up. i have subs and an intake and exhaust. and she's 60 years old. i wish i could've seen her from another car

[zeff789]

That would be just mean to make them order all new parts for your car. I would never do that. It's true my parents did buy me my car, but they also gave it to me, they didnt say "it is only yours to drive", they actually signed it over. But for some reason I would like to have my parents permission to satisfy my inner conscience. That's just me

[bk2kmax]

Zeff,
Antman gave some good advice, however I am a parent as well and I say that if you would like your parents to allow you to modify your car show them everything you intend to do, why you intend to do it and how responsible you are going to be after you have done so.
Most of all get there permission first, it is easier to convince us (parents) when we can see actual results or reasoning behind your desires that motivate you to do whatever.
Go to the webpages and download the pictures, kits, maintenance and costs of everything you intend to do to your Max. Go slowly, convince them that you are responsible, show them only one thing (mod) at a time.
Don't lie to your parents, let them see your interests and if they are truly understanding parents and they love you, they will support you as long as you aren't doing anything stupid and overly expensive.
Good Luck
Talk to them first about you (why you like this idea).

[zeff789]

Thanks for the great advice guys, and especially bk2kmax and Antman. You'r ideas will make my conscience be at rest about doing things to my car, I think i'm going to have to talk to my dad more about it because my mom just thinks /everything/ is defacing the car, but my dad says to me "Jeff, you'r car is not a toy." What I dont get is, how is taking the Maxima letters, inserting a grill, or other things making your car a toy? I just don't understand that, I may just be naive or stupid, but will someone explain?

[bk2kmax]

Originally posted by zeff789
Thanks for the great advice guys, and especially bk2kmax and Antman. You'r ideas will make my conscience be at rest about doing things to my car, I think i'm going to have to talk to my dad more about it because my mom just thinks /everything/ is defacing the car, but my dad says to me "Jeff, you'r car is not a toy." What I dont get is, how is taking the Maxima letters, inserting a grill, or other things making your car a toy? I just don't understand that, I may just be naive or stupid, but will someone explain?

This is simple, explain to your parents that your car is an extension of who you are (your personality), the Max in it's purist form is meant to be a family car, although when you hook it up, they look real tight like they were meant for younger teenage folks.
Just try to appeal to your Dad more first,<I meant to put this in my last reply but I didn't want to seem bias because I really don't know your parents. Dad can convince mom and eventually when her over but as long as you do what I asked you to do, keeping them informed and being safety conscious, you will win them both over.

It might not be a bad idea to print some of these quotes or replies to your thread to show to your parents. The one thing a parent hate is lies and the other thing is secrecy, don't lie and don't keep secrets and you will have their support in nearly everything you do.
Remember Zeff you are young and the one friend you have on your side is time, so be patient, truthful and nonsecretive and you will eventually win them both over.