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For now, just try the suggestions that I have given. Get a new battery and change the oil before you try and start. The reason for the oil thing is because the car was stationed for two months, all the oil in the engine is settled at the bottome and thus, no lubrication for upper parts. When the car is on, just listen to see if anything is wrong and correct as the problems arise.
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Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
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