Wow, that's a difficult post to read and attempt to decipher.
Let's start by asking what caused you to get two more ECMs for the car, what was the original one doing?
It sounds like the ECM that is lighting the Check Engine Light (CEL) works better, so I'd suggest you consider that your baseline and work from there. Since you mention that it provided 5 codes, please list those codes, they could certainly provide some suggestions on what may be happening. It's possible one circuit/sensor could be causing all 5 codes.
If for some reason you decide you want to use the other ECM you're going to need to better describe what you mean by "the car wants me to hit the windshsield".
-Rod