i dont know of any "reset" but the relay is in the dash behind the stereo by the firewall..its not black either its a silver relay between the PCM and the antilock brake computer.the easiest way to find it is remove the panel to the right of the gas pedal in the center console/dash
(mine is a 96 by the way but i dont think theres much difference)it took me hours to find it when i had an electrical fire from a car stereo amp wire.always remember to fuse your amp power wire ppl a $2 fuse cost me hundreds in repairs.
you can also bypass it with a fused jumper and a ground like i did,dealer didnt have it nor did any auto part store.unless your lucky enough to find a competent salvage yard that can actually find it themselves