It was definitely the flywheel.
The good folks at Lee Myles Transmission did the job for a grand, including a new starter, and it's been fine. they also flushed the trannie and diff.
200K miles around the corner on this beast. Car came to Boston from NYC
with 90K on it. I bought it in '00 and put 104k more on it; supports my premise that if you feed them well, you can work 'em hard.
So - understanding why regular car shops don't like doing this type of repair, to trannie shops it's really no problem at all. Those guys know how to do 'em!