Here’s a good drunk story to add to my repertoire. About a month ago, I was out in a bar in Hartford called The Pig’s Eye Pub. It was a stellar evening, as I was downing my current favorite, Red Bull and Stoli (spelling?) Vanilla vodka. This not only gives me a great buzz, but an impressive “permagrin” as well. And it was just working to full effect of magical charm. It was so damned good that at one point I was walking around on the balcony, and as I was passing by this guy who was hitting on some girl, he asked her “so what do you look for in a guy?” She gestured over to me, and said “someone like him.” Not to boast, but that’s the kind of evening it was for me. I remember talking to this one girl who had a shirt with a picture of a bridge on it (the bridge image stretched across her chest), and I admitted that even though the bridge was very pretty, I really liked looking at it because it allowed me to look at her breasts without being quite as obvious as it normally would be for me to do so. Then there was her friend, who was wearing these very sexy, tight white pants. For the life of me, I couldn’t see any panty lines, so I kept asking her (the girl with the bridge shirt) “are you sure your friend’s wearing underwear?” And I got away with it all!! The women of Hartford didn’t stand a chance against me!!
To make a good evening even better, I was naturally in no state for driving when all was said and done on this night. I’ll give my two friends Ari and Michelle a lot of gratitude, because not only did they drive me back to the building where they lived, let me crash in Michelle’s empty apartment, and give me a bottle of Dasani water to help my alcohol and caffeine-induced dehydration, they even drove my car over to the building and parked it outside for me. Awesome is an understatement in describing a situation this beautiful.
Anyway, I wound up meeting like 8 to 10 girls, and I was so buzzed I didn’t even bother getting phone numbers, and I didn’t care either. At last call, one of the girls I had been talking to bumped into me, and with her friend Kim right there with her, said that I should gave Kim a call. But she didn’t give me her number, just her name and the town she lived in.
Of course I immediately forgot Kim’s first name, so the trip back to the apartment building I kept asking Ari and Michelle for typical Irish first names. I finally got it, so from bed before I were to forget it again, I called information to get her number. I forgot that when you call from a cell phone, they automatically connect you. So here it is, about 2:30 am, and the Kim’s phone is ringing. Fortunately her answering machine picks up, but then she picks up. So I sit there shocked for a second, and then I say “uhh.. did I meet you at Pig’s Eye Pub tonight?” She of course says yes. Not the best way to get it done, but it worked. She and I have now been dating for about a month, give or take. Never know how or when you'll meet someone you really like.