Just to inform I went and pulled the gromet, my valve cover is an updated one, no small hole as info in tsb, cleaned the gromet with dish liquid for its grease and oil cutting properties. getting a new pcv valve but old one went in much better. DUUHHHHHHH me i should have done this before if you got oil around it of course it will be loose. The gromet is in really good shape so I will reset the obd and see what happens may still replace other items on the tsb just to keep with updates
http://leckemby.net/windstar/windstar01.html
http://leckemby.net/windstar/tsb1.jpeg
http://leckemby.net/windstar/windstar01.html
Just for those who may want to research and to bring it closer to the front again here are some sites you can research this issue. Again thanks guys and of course if other info is out there throw them in..
quick note though my problem with the valve cover that threw me was I thought the updated one was metal but that was the replacement. I guess they wanted to keep plastic in the game. Or mine looks to be black plastic. Thanks,gary