KB we have all done things at one time or another in which we were neither proud of, not have done, or done it differently. The important thing is you recognized this and have proceeded to make things right. It is a tough and lonely road but as a friend, and I hope you feel the same feel free to bend my ear. Contrary to any other beliefs I am a good listener and have been through tons of shit over my years.
Take it easy and one day at a time. You have my support if you ever wish to use