for the oil in the spark plug chamber, if you take off the valve cover you should see o-rings that seat against the head. yours are probably the originals that came with the car, and as such are smashed as flat as possible. they cost about $3 at the dealership and take a minute to replace them all. just pull the old ones out and pop the new ones in. thats what solved the problem on my old 90 accord anways.
as for the fuel filter, the first time i replaced that on my own, it was a bitch too. just try and find some way to hold it down, but do not ruin any of the fuel lines running to it. its easy to crimp them, along with ruin the banjo bolt. admitting defeat and taking it to a shop isnt too shameful for a fuel filter, considering how sensitive those fuel lines can be.