Is there a Santa Claus?
kris
10-26-2001, 12:46 AM
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No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle most Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to
park,
hop out of the sleigh,
jump down the chimney,
fill the stockings,
distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks
have been left,
get back up the chimney,
get back into the sleigh and
move on to the next house.
Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.
This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison, this is four times the weight of the cruise ship Queen Elizabeth II.
353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to acceleration forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.
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No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle most Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to
park,
hop out of the sleigh,
jump down the chimney,
fill the stockings,
distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks
have been left,
get back up the chimney,
get back into the sleigh and
move on to the next house.
Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.
This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison, this is four times the weight of the cruise ship Queen Elizabeth II.
353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to acceleration forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.
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frogg
10-26-2001, 02:49 AM
Originally posted by kbslacker
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In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second.
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hahahah :smoker2:
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In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second.
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hahahah :smoker2:
YogsVR4
10-26-2001, 11:20 AM
Originally posted by kbslacker
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17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)
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I like the 250 as being ludicrously slim considering I am still around the 235 mark.
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17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)
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I like the 250 as being ludicrously slim considering I am still around the 235 mark.
Darkwing
10-26-2001, 12:43 PM
Are you trying to say that there is no Santa Claus? Cuz there is. I seen him in my home. He can distort time and move in subspace. He is magical, most known physics he can get around. He does exist! And if you say he doesn't then you're wrong cuz my parents TOLD me he is real.
So there :p
So there :p
redvalkrie
10-26-2001, 01:40 PM
Actually there is a Santa Calus he has been known to appear in the hearts of some very loving giving people!
These are the people that make Santa True!:D
These are the people that make Santa True!:D
Tireburner
10-26-2001, 04:22 PM
I think someone has WAY too much time on their hands!!:eek: :smoka:
primera man
10-26-2001, 06:25 PM
The older you get the less xmas means untill you get kids and the joy on there faces is priceless.
Nice thoughts though KB.. :D
Nice thoughts though KB.. :D
MercCougarXR7
10-26-2001, 07:05 PM
Santa is nothing but a distraction from the real meaning of CHRISTMAS. Note the emphesis on Christ. Trust me - our faces lit up the same as the kids that believe in Santa when we opened our presents - the ones that we knew came from our parents.
Also, notice at Easter, a holiday to commemorate the death and resurection of Christ that a Rabbit is used as a distraction? And Halloween - kids dress up as goblins, ghouls and ghosts - also a distraction from a once religeous celebration.
Also, notice at Easter, a holiday to commemorate the death and resurection of Christ that a Rabbit is used as a distraction? And Halloween - kids dress up as goblins, ghouls and ghosts - also a distraction from a once religeous celebration.
gang$tarr
10-26-2001, 07:49 PM
I don't think i ever got a present that wasn't bought by my parents so, no he doesn't exist.
I think Santa Claus was just this generous guy that gave kids presents on christmas a couple hundred years ago... i read it somewhere. The whole legend is based on him, all the other stuff is just made up for show.. like flying reindeers, northpole, elves, going through chimney's, etc.
most of this stuff is mainly in North America i think, there isn't as much hype about him in like Japan
I think they just made the movies like that and then it just evolved into people thinking that's how santa is
I think Santa Claus was just this generous guy that gave kids presents on christmas a couple hundred years ago... i read it somewhere. The whole legend is based on him, all the other stuff is just made up for show.. like flying reindeers, northpole, elves, going through chimney's, etc.
most of this stuff is mainly in North America i think, there isn't as much hype about him in like Japan
I think they just made the movies like that and then it just evolved into people thinking that's how santa is
Heep
10-26-2001, 08:10 PM
I too come from a Christian household, but I was told that Santa exists, but also about baby Jesus. I believed in Santa Claus, but wondered why I never got any presents from him...all my presents were from Mom, Dad, aunts, uncles, etc...never any from Santa. Then I figured it out
gang$tarr
10-26-2001, 08:17 PM
i used to believe in santa... my parents wrote santa on the presents too :) i stopped believing when i was like 8, probably cause i walked in on my dad rapping one of the presents labeled santa, LOL :D so i thought my dad was santa
Also Santa seemed to write exactly like my mom! curious
Also Santa seemed to write exactly like my mom! curious
nubiannupe
10-27-2001, 10:14 AM
Originally posted by Tireburner
I think someone has WAY too much time on their hands!!:eek: :smoka:
AMEN to that!!!!:silly2:
I think someone has WAY too much time on their hands!!:eek: :smoka:
AMEN to that!!!!:silly2:
Lizard King
10-27-2001, 10:48 AM
I'm crushed. Finally the evidence I hoped I wouldn't see. :(
I think I'll print that out and post it into some childrens homes.:licker:
I think I'll print that out and post it into some childrens homes.:licker:
nubiannupe
10-27-2001, 10:53 AM
I wouldn't ruin someone's christmas by telling them that!! The jury is still out with me on whether there's a tooth fairy!!! So, I don't wanna hear any theories and hypotheses on HIM/HER either!!:flipa:
mfc_boss
10-27-2001, 02:18 PM
i can't believe your actually talking about this.........
of course he exists.
heres how it works:your parents still buy and wrap the presents,
(i mean you don't really believe his helpers make all that stuff now do you!!)
they then send them to santa to deliver(cos everyone knows there's no post around christmas time)
he is magical and can control time and physics (how else could he make reindeer fly and fit his fat but down a chimney???)
hope this has made you all realise your errors
:D
of course he exists.
heres how it works:your parents still buy and wrap the presents,
(i mean you don't really believe his helpers make all that stuff now do you!!)
they then send them to santa to deliver(cos everyone knows there's no post around christmas time)
he is magical and can control time and physics (how else could he make reindeer fly and fit his fat but down a chimney???)
hope this has made you all realise your errors
:D
gang$tarr
10-27-2001, 05:06 PM
what would be the point of your parents buying and wrapping the presents then sending them to santa?!?!? if they could just walk over to the tree and set them down! hahaha :D :D
mfc_boss
10-27-2001, 05:34 PM
:D cos it's special if santa brings them:D
:right:
:right:
Porsche
10-27-2001, 06:16 PM
My god, that is undoubtly the funniest thing I've ever read! :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: You get 147/10 Happy faces.
Jay!
10-27-2001, 06:19 PM
Originally posted by Porsche
You get 147/10 Happy faces. There's only 83. :confused:
You get 147/10 Happy faces. There's only 83. :confused:
Porsche
10-27-2001, 06:22 PM
Always a critic.
gang$tarr
10-27-2001, 06:30 PM
Originally posted by Porsche
Always a critic.
hahahaahah..... i love subtle jokes like that :) :hehehe:
Always a critic.
hahahaahah..... i love subtle jokes like that :) :hehehe:
Heep
10-28-2001, 01:53 AM
Isn't 147/10 happy faces 14.7 happy faces?
mfc_boss
10-28-2001, 05:12 AM
Originally posted by Heep
Isn't 147/10 happy faces 14.7 happy faces?
i too struggled with the mathematics of it....then thought "whatever":evillaugh
Isn't 147/10 happy faces 14.7 happy faces?
i too struggled with the mathematics of it....then thought "whatever":evillaugh
Rich
10-28-2001, 12:27 PM
Originally posted by MercCougarXR7
Santa is nothing but a distraction from the real meaning of CHRISTMAS. Note the emphesis on Christ. Trust me - our faces lit up the same as the kids that believe in Santa when we opened our presents - the ones that we knew came from our parents.
Also, notice at Easter, a holiday to commemorate the death and resurection of Christ that a Rabbit is used as a distraction? And Halloween - kids dress up as goblins, ghouls and ghosts - also a distraction from a once religeous celebration.
Im not christian, but I agree 100%. Stuff has beed added or changed to alter the real meaning of these days. I find that retarded :mad:
Santa is nothing but a distraction from the real meaning of CHRISTMAS. Note the emphesis on Christ. Trust me - our faces lit up the same as the kids that believe in Santa when we opened our presents - the ones that we knew came from our parents.
Also, notice at Easter, a holiday to commemorate the death and resurection of Christ that a Rabbit is used as a distraction? And Halloween - kids dress up as goblins, ghouls and ghosts - also a distraction from a once religeous celebration.
Im not christian, but I agree 100%. Stuff has beed added or changed to alter the real meaning of these days. I find that retarded :mad:
Tireburner
10-29-2001, 08:26 AM
Cheech and Chong did it the best.
Yeah, he has this magic dust... He gives a little to the reindeer, a little for Santa Claus, a little more for Santa Claus, a little more for Santa Claus, and he flies all around the world!
If you've never heard it, you should make it a point.. It' s halarious!!
Yeah, he has this magic dust... He gives a little to the reindeer, a little for Santa Claus, a little more for Santa Claus, a little more for Santa Claus, and he flies all around the world!
If you've never heard it, you should make it a point.. It' s halarious!!
gang$tarr
10-29-2001, 09:49 PM
Originally posted by Tireburner
Cheech and Chong did it the best.
LOL!! Cheech and Chong are hilarious :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe:
Cheech is parked and he's like [spanish accent] yo man, am i goin to fast
hehehe.... you have to be watchin it to laugh, it's not funny when you write it :D
but i'm pretty sure everybody here has seen it, hehe
Cheech and Chong did it the best.
LOL!! Cheech and Chong are hilarious :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe: :hehehe:
Cheech is parked and he's like [spanish accent] yo man, am i goin to fast
hehehe.... you have to be watchin it to laugh, it's not funny when you write it :D
but i'm pretty sure everybody here has seen it, hehe
johnny
10-29-2001, 10:50 PM
Santa = Satan
gang$tarr
10-29-2001, 10:58 PM
Originally posted by johnny
Santa = Satan
mind explaining how that works?! A jolly fat man that brings you presents.... satan :huh: :huh: :huh:
Santa = Satan
mind explaining how that works?! A jolly fat man that brings you presents.... satan :huh: :huh: :huh:
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