Transmission Problems

I have a 2002 3.0 L 4x4 Ford Escape (red if anyone cares), that I have been having trouble with. It just rolled over 80k on her and this problem has been going on for about two years. I changed the fluid just over a year ago at about 68K and the problem seemed to go away. Then a couple of months back it started again. I have just put some transmission honey in and I haven't noticed a difference. I am thinking I need to change the transmission oil and filter but I do not know where the filter is located. Changing the oil is a pain since they went away for using a transmission drain plug. Any help or instructions would be great.

Details of Problems:
1) High rpm’s when shifting into drive or reverse
2) Stiff acceleration pedal
3) Hard shifting
4) Chug Chug Chug sounds when hauling

The first two I am thinking are not related but I want to give you all the information on what the car has been doing.