Surviving a terror attack

once again, let me know if you get offended. personally I think it's quite funny.

http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/terror.html

lol those are good

Pretty funny,

I stole this one from someone at Neons.org :) Enjoy! hehe

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]http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_dust.gif
Don't get trapped under stuff.

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If you spot an act of terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, just yell really loudly.

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Learn karate to open doors.

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Swerve to avoid explosions.

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How to dress like Michael Jackson.

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If you become trapped under something, amuse yourself with flashlight games.

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Contemplate nature.

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Please know beforehand where the last place you would like to fuck is.

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If you are a passenger and you spot an act of terrorism, pull and release this quickly.

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Please eject anyone from your vicinity that seems to be performing the Electric Slide.

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If you are a Christian, please enter your nearest church and pray for a quick death.

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Thinking about chemicals long enough causes them to materialize from nowhere.

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Please do not lie on the floor while attempting to hotbox.

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Should debris suddenly fall from the ceiling, find a computer with no power supply to crawl under.

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Allow paramedics to perform necrophilic acts on the deceased.

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If you suck at chemistry, you will probably die.

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Your phone may be a licensed physician.

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All stereos can be considered terrorists. If you see one, run away quickly or cower in fear.

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Please ensure your vehicle is traveling at exactly 88 MPH before driving into any high-voltage power lines.

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In the event of an emergency, your file cabinets will become intimidating. Do not file or organize.

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Remeber to do the Hokey-Pokey whenever possible.

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Rather than disposing them, store all your cigarette butts in pill bottles.

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Hurry, the Human Torch, trouble brews!

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Tell terrorists to "talk to the hand, because the face ain't listenin!"

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Avoid setting your house on fire.

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Please only wash your hands with floating faucets.

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Anal sex may cause bouts of crying and depressions for those previously inexperienced.

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Please do not attempt to skateboard up stairs.

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Please do not use the same tissue to blow your nose repeatedly.

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Do not peek over bathroom stalls. There may be radiation lurking.

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To confuse terrorists, please set your electronic devices clocks to different times.

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Please store any incendiary or explosive devices in proper storage bins.

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Should sound come out of your cassette deck rather than your speakers, please exit vehicle immediately.

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Should you spot a red terrorist arrow, pin it against a door with your shoulder.

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This may be your last chance to see Phantom of the Opera.

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If terrorists attack, throw small animals into interdimensional portals.

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Should you find yourself trapped, Batman will rescue you if you give the proper signal.

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Avoid Taco Bell at all costs.

:silly2:

Have I told you lately, that the US sucks??? Dude, Ridge couldn't take care of PA let alone the whole U.S. :o

Anyhoo, it's just one more reason to laugh at our goverment before we're all blown to pieces by Michael Jackson.

LMFAO!!!

KatWoman: http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/t90065.html

:)

Originally posted by saturntangerine
Anyhoo, it's just one more reason to laugh at our goverment before we're all blown to pieces by Michael Jackson.

Or before Michael Jackson is blown to pieces by Iraq :silly2:

Originally posted by Toksin
KatWoman: http://www.automotiveforums.com/vbulletin/t90065.html

:)

Dammit I missed that one. Guess alot of forum people are having fun with it :D