Five things that women should never, ever ask a guy
YogsVR4
10-11-2002, 04:04 PM
I'm on a roll.....
There are five things that women should never, ever ask a guy, according to an article in an issue of Sassy magazine. The five questions are:
1 - "What are you thinking?"
2 - "Do you love me?"
3 - "Do I look fat?"
4 - "Do you think she is prettier than me?"
5 - "What would you do if I died?"
What makes these questions so bad is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man does not answer properly.
1 - "What are you thinking?" The proper answer to this question, of course is, "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, caring, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to have met you." Obviously, this statement bears no resemblance whatsoever to what the guy was really thinking at the time, which was most likely one of five things:
a - Football
b - Baseball
c - How fat you are.
d - How much prettier she is than you.
e - How he would spend the insurance money if you died.
According to the Sassy article, the best answer to this stupid question came from Al Bundy, of Married With Children, who was asked it by his wife, Peg. "If I wanted you to know," Al said, "I'd be talking instead of thinking."
The other questions also have only one right answer but many wrong answers:
2 - "Do you love me?" The correct answer to this question is, "Yes." For those guys who feel the need to be more elaborate, you may answer, "Yes, dear."
Wrong answers include:
a - I suppose so.
b - Would it make you feel better if I said yes.
c - That depends on what you mean by "love".
d - Does it matter?
e - Who, me?
Next...
3 - "Do I look fat?" The correct male response to this question is to confidently and emphatically state, "No, of course not" and then quickly leave the room.
Wrong answers include:
a - I wouldn't call you fat, but I wouldn't call you thin either.
b - Compared to what?
c - A little extra weight looks good on you.
d - I've seen fatter.
e - Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
And then, there's this one:
4 - "Do you think she's prettier than me?" The "she" in the
question could be an ex-girlfriend, a passer-by you were staring at so hard that you almost cause a traffic accident or an actress in a movie you just saw. In any case, the correct response is, "No, you are much prettier."
Wrong answers include:
a - Not prettier, just pretty in a different way.
b - I don't know how one goes about rating such things.
c - Yes, but I bet you have a better personality.
d - Only in the sense that she's younger and thinner.
e - Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
5 - "What would you do if I died?" Correct answer: "Dearest love, in the event of your untimely demise, life would cease to have meaning for me and I would perforce hurl myself under the front tires of the first Domino's Pizza truck that came my way."
This might be the stupidest question of the lot, as is illustrated by the following stupid joke:
"Dear," said the wife. "What would you do if I died?" "Why, dear, I would be extremely upset," said the husband. "Why do you ask such a question?" "Would you remarry?" persevered the wife. "No, of course not, dear" said the husband. "Don't you like being married?" said the wife. "Of course I do, dear" he said. "Then why wouldn't you remarry?" "All right," said the husband, "I'd remarry." "You would?" said the wife, looking vaguely hurt. "Yes" said the husband. "Would you sleep with her in our bed?" said the wife after a long pause. "Well yes, I suppose I would." replied the husband. "I see," said the wife indignantly. "And would you let her wear my old clothes?" "I suppose, if she wanted to" said the husband. "Really," said the wife icily. "And would you take down the pictures of me and replace them with pictures of her?" "Yes. I think that would be the correct thing to do." "Is that so?" said the wife, leaping to her feet. "And I suppose you'd let her play with my golf clubs, too." "Of course not, dear," said the husband. "She's left-handed."
There are five things that women should never, ever ask a guy, according to an article in an issue of Sassy magazine. The five questions are:
1 - "What are you thinking?"
2 - "Do you love me?"
3 - "Do I look fat?"
4 - "Do you think she is prettier than me?"
5 - "What would you do if I died?"
What makes these questions so bad is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man does not answer properly.
1 - "What are you thinking?" The proper answer to this question, of course is, "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, caring, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to have met you." Obviously, this statement bears no resemblance whatsoever to what the guy was really thinking at the time, which was most likely one of five things:
a - Football
b - Baseball
c - How fat you are.
d - How much prettier she is than you.
e - How he would spend the insurance money if you died.
According to the Sassy article, the best answer to this stupid question came from Al Bundy, of Married With Children, who was asked it by his wife, Peg. "If I wanted you to know," Al said, "I'd be talking instead of thinking."
The other questions also have only one right answer but many wrong answers:
2 - "Do you love me?" The correct answer to this question is, "Yes." For those guys who feel the need to be more elaborate, you may answer, "Yes, dear."
Wrong answers include:
a - I suppose so.
b - Would it make you feel better if I said yes.
c - That depends on what you mean by "love".
d - Does it matter?
e - Who, me?
Next...
3 - "Do I look fat?" The correct male response to this question is to confidently and emphatically state, "No, of course not" and then quickly leave the room.
Wrong answers include:
a - I wouldn't call you fat, but I wouldn't call you thin either.
b - Compared to what?
c - A little extra weight looks good on you.
d - I've seen fatter.
e - Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
And then, there's this one:
4 - "Do you think she's prettier than me?" The "she" in the
question could be an ex-girlfriend, a passer-by you were staring at so hard that you almost cause a traffic accident or an actress in a movie you just saw. In any case, the correct response is, "No, you are much prettier."
Wrong answers include:
a - Not prettier, just pretty in a different way.
b - I don't know how one goes about rating such things.
c - Yes, but I bet you have a better personality.
d - Only in the sense that she's younger and thinner.
e - Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
5 - "What would you do if I died?" Correct answer: "Dearest love, in the event of your untimely demise, life would cease to have meaning for me and I would perforce hurl myself under the front tires of the first Domino's Pizza truck that came my way."
This might be the stupidest question of the lot, as is illustrated by the following stupid joke:
"Dear," said the wife. "What would you do if I died?" "Why, dear, I would be extremely upset," said the husband. "Why do you ask such a question?" "Would you remarry?" persevered the wife. "No, of course not, dear" said the husband. "Don't you like being married?" said the wife. "Of course I do, dear" he said. "Then why wouldn't you remarry?" "All right," said the husband, "I'd remarry." "You would?" said the wife, looking vaguely hurt. "Yes" said the husband. "Would you sleep with her in our bed?" said the wife after a long pause. "Well yes, I suppose I would." replied the husband. "I see," said the wife indignantly. "And would you let her wear my old clothes?" "I suppose, if she wanted to" said the husband. "Really," said the wife icily. "And would you take down the pictures of me and replace them with pictures of her?" "Yes. I think that would be the correct thing to do." "Is that so?" said the wife, leaping to her feet. "And I suppose you'd let her play with my golf clubs, too." "Of course not, dear," said the husband. "She's left-handed."
kicker1_solo
10-11-2002, 04:11 PM
lol, I've been asked all of those :D
Ssom
10-11-2002, 07:07 PM
Originally posted by kicker1_solo
lol, I've been asked all of those :D
thats coz you are boring:finger:
lol, I've been asked all of those :D
thats coz you are boring:finger:
ci5ic
10-11-2002, 08:37 PM
I get asked at least 4 of those questions every single day. Usually, I will be woken from a deep slumber for the sole purpose of answering them, which only adds to the complexity of things.
JD@af
10-11-2002, 09:26 PM
#3 is really the shit question, because I've been asked that one more than once by girls I wasn't dating, or even getting any from! :rolleyes:
kicker1_solo
10-12-2002, 02:21 AM
Does this dress make me look fat?
No, I don't think it's the dress :lol2:
No, I don't think it's the dress :lol2:
SentraGirl
10-12-2002, 08:29 PM
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
YellowMaranello
10-12-2002, 08:52 PM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
Not so much lie as just be so incredibly sarcastic about it that she can't help but laugh.
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
Not so much lie as just be so incredibly sarcastic about it that she can't help but laugh.
Damien
10-12-2002, 09:02 PM
I'm too young to care if I say the correct thing or not, but being me, I know what to do. :smoker2:
But those were funny yogs!!! :hehehe::hehehe:
But those were funny yogs!!! :hehehe::hehehe:
Ssom
10-12-2002, 10:19 PM
Originally posted by Damien
I'm too young to care if I say the correct thing or not, but being me, I know what to do. :smoker2:
PROVE IT!!!!!:devil:
I'm too young to care if I say the correct thing or not, but being me, I know what to do. :smoker2:
PROVE IT!!!!!:devil:
Damien
10-13-2002, 12:36 AM
How would I do that Moss?
SentraGirl
10-13-2002, 10:19 AM
Ok, sorry guys because this might be a question a chick should never ask a guy but if you cheated on your girlfriend would you tell her or try to hide it?:confused:
JD@af
10-13-2002, 06:33 PM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
Ok, sorry guys because this might be a question a chick should never ask a guy but if you cheated on your girlfriend would you tell her or try to hide it?:confused: :D :D :D Talk about a "that depends" answer :right: :right: :right:
Ok, sorry guys because this might be a question a chick should never ask a guy but if you cheated on your girlfriend would you tell her or try to hide it?:confused: :D :D :D Talk about a "that depends" answer :right: :right: :right:
Graphik Styles
10-13-2002, 07:14 PM
well if your lover(or whoever it may concern) asks you any of these questions it aint that bad to tell a white lie if it makes her feel better..............:)
SentraGirl
10-13-2002, 08:29 PM
I can see your point about the "white lie" to make her feel better but how would you feel? If you were truly in love with this girl and she thought something was going on and it really was could you live with yourself and lie to her while looking into her eyes?:flipa:
Spec2 Girl
10-13-2002, 08:34 PM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
If you were truly in love with this girl and she thought something was going on and it really was could you live with yourself and lie to her while looking into her eyes?:flipa: Unfortunately some guys can do this but then I would doubt they were really in love if they could do it.
If you were truly in love with this girl and she thought something was going on and it really was could you live with yourself and lie to her while looking into her eyes?:flipa: Unfortunately some guys can do this but then I would doubt they were really in love if they could do it.
SentraGirl
10-13-2002, 08:37 PM
Originally posted by Spec2 Girl
Unfortunately some guys can do this but then I would doubt they were really in love if they could do it.
Wow, very good point! I was just curious is someone could actually just flat out lie like that to the person they supposedly love. My friend had someone cheat on her and she still doesn't believe it, like she denies it. Pisses me off, girls have intuitions for reasons.:rolleyes:
Unfortunately some guys can do this but then I would doubt they were really in love if they could do it.
Wow, very good point! I was just curious is someone could actually just flat out lie like that to the person they supposedly love. My friend had someone cheat on her and she still doesn't believe it, like she denies it. Pisses me off, girls have intuitions for reasons.:rolleyes:
Spec2 Girl
10-13-2002, 08:42 PM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
Wow, very good point! I was just curious is someone could actually just flat out lie like that to the person they supposedly love. My friend had someone cheat on her and she still doesn't believe it, like she denies it. Pisses me off, girls have intuitions for reasons.:rolleyes: Some people just refuse to accept it or think that they will change. It's the same with abuse. Some women stay in abusive relationships believing there husband/boyfriend when they say that they're sorry and that it won't happen again. Needless to say it does happen again and again and again.
Wow, very good point! I was just curious is someone could actually just flat out lie like that to the person they supposedly love. My friend had someone cheat on her and she still doesn't believe it, like she denies it. Pisses me off, girls have intuitions for reasons.:rolleyes: Some people just refuse to accept it or think that they will change. It's the same with abuse. Some women stay in abusive relationships believing there husband/boyfriend when they say that they're sorry and that it won't happen again. Needless to say it does happen again and again and again.
SentraGirl
10-13-2002, 08:45 PM
Wow, that's just so sad! I understand how people can believe that others will change but damn, after a few months of the same thing, I would assume they get the picture that they won't. Some things can be changed but then there's others that just can't, especially if they don't want it so much. Thanks for all the insight SpecGirl
tazdev
10-14-2002, 01:11 AM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
Yes I would lie if I thought that it was the correct thing to do. Hey sometimes the TRUTH HURTS, in cases like that yes I would lie
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
Yes I would lie if I thought that it was the correct thing to do. Hey sometimes the TRUTH HURTS, in cases like that yes I would lie
YogsVR4
10-14-2002, 09:16 AM
Originally posted by SentraGirl
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
For the same reason a woman will ask a loaded question like those that she knows the answers to but leaves the guy hanging out to dry. Honesty will get him smacked and not laid. If he lies, they both know it but she cant call him on the mat for it.
Do you guys lie if a woman asks you any one of those questions? If so, why do you lie rather than be honest with her?:flipa:
For the same reason a woman will ask a loaded question like those that she knows the answers to but leaves the guy hanging out to dry. Honesty will get him smacked and not laid. If he lies, they both know it but she cant call him on the mat for it.
taranaki
10-14-2002, 09:23 AM
Moral of story....Don't ask emotive questions unless you are confident that you can handle any given answer.Please don't ask me the kind of questions that will make you unhappy if my honest opinion is not the desired response.The best thing for these situations is selective deafness,followed by a lightning-fast change of subject.
SentraGirl
10-14-2002, 10:20 AM
Originally posted by taranaki
The best thing for these situations is selective deafness,followed by a lightning-fast change of subject.
LMFAO:D
The best thing for these situations is selective deafness,followed by a lightning-fast change of subject.
LMFAO:D
Graphik Styles
10-14-2002, 11:26 AM
its tru its tru.........goodn't have put it in better words myself :)
DVSNCYNIKL
10-14-2002, 01:54 PM
I always tell my girl the same thing. Don't ask me a question you aren't prepared to handle the answer to. She seldom asks me anything.:D
Graphik Styles
10-14-2002, 03:29 PM
the perfect solution to all this would be not to have a girl.............but who is gonna break up wit someone cause of questions like these...........
YogsVR4
10-14-2002, 03:39 PM
Originally posted by De$i Gank$ta
the perfect solution to all this would be not to have a girl.............but who is gonna break up wit someone cause of questions like these...........
Thats not to practicle if the girl is your wife :)
the perfect solution to all this would be not to have a girl.............but who is gonna break up wit someone cause of questions like these...........
Thats not to practicle if the girl is your wife :)
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