what your car says about you

I'm not sure if you have seen this before, but I found it pretty funny.


What Your Car Says About You
Acura Integra - I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars

Acura Legend - I'm too bland for German cars

Acura NSX - I am impotent

AMC - Ain't My Car

Audi 90 - I enjoy putting out engine fires

Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Eldorado - I am a very good Mary Kay salesman

Cadillac Seville - I am a pimp

Chevrolet Camaro - I enjoy beating the hell out of people

Chevrolet Chevette - I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette

Chevrolet Corvette - I'm in a mid-life crisis

Chevrolet Cavalier - Absolute LEGEND!

Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

Chrysler Cordoba - I dig the rich Corinthian leather

Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Dodge Dart - I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

Dodge Daytona - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car

Ferrari Testarossa - I am known to prematurely ejaculate

Ford Explorer - I will not be caught dead in a mini van

Ford Fairmont - (See Dodge Dart)

Ford Mustang - I slow down to 85 in school zones

Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull
up behind them.

Geo Storm - I will start the 11th grade in the fall.

Geo Tracker - I will start the 12th grade in the fall.

Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all

Honda Civic - I have just graduated and have no credit

Honda Accord - I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.

Infiniti Q45 - I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.

Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports.

Jaguar XJ6 - I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year.

Kia Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp.

Lamborghini Countach - I only have one testicle

Lincoln Town Car - I live for bingo and covered dish suppers

Mercury Grand Marquis - (See above)

Mercedes 500SL - I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mercedes 560SEL - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler

MGB - I am dating a mechanic

Mitsubishi Diamante - I don't know what it means either

Nissan 300ZX - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.

Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Peugeot 505 Diesel - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List

Plymouth Neon - I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena

Pontiac Trans AM - I have a switchblade in my sock

Porsche 911 Turbo - I have a three inch penis.

Porsche 944 - I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanon is a tad bit too liberal

Saturn SC2 - (See Honda Civic)

Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu

Toyota Camry - I am still in the closet

Volkswagon Beetle - I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagon Cabriolet - I am out of the closet

Volkswagon Microbus - I am tripping right now

Volvo 740 Wagon - I am frightened of my wife

http://earth.vol.com/~webtek//carjokecentral/

http://24.68.44.161/funstuff/youare.swf

haha just kidding

OMG thats histerical. The best one is the Chevette.

i'm the ford mustang: i slow down to 85 in school zones. so true:biggrin:

Originally posted by Jonno
Acura NSX - I am impotent
Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well
Ferrari Testarossa - I am known to prematurely ejaculate
Kia Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp.
Lamborghini Countac - I only have one testicle
Toyota Camry - I am still in the closet
Volkswagon Cabriolet - I am out of the closet

:spit:

Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts
This one is my favorite, my dad had like four, cause they got stolen like 4 times when we lived in Newark, New Jersey. Then it was robbed again in Miami.

LMAO!!!:rofl:

Mazda Miata- Im not gay, but my Miata is.

Originally posted by Jonno

Acura NSX - I am impotent


HAHAHHAHAHAH

:grinyes: hehe i have a civic..
and horrible credit...lol

Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states


I am a teenager in high school with a park avenue.

very original Jonno :screwy:,

I hope you didn't type all of that because all ya had to do was give them the link you found on the net :lol2:

http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/96/Sep/cars.html

Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull
up behind them.
So true and it work anywhere, just replace it by a white Ford mondeo or Volvo v70 for the UK and a deep blue clio or megane estate (the version before last) for France.

lol thats very funny hahaha :lol: :lol:

:lol2: :iceslolan

Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

how did they know?!

A few updated ones, and ones I made up because I am online at 2am and have no life whatsoever and like to make fun of yuppie cars and POS sleds.

Acura RS-X - My engine redlines at eight grand, but I still can't get off the line to beat a Chrysler LeBaron!

BMW M3 Coupe - I own the fast lane, even if I choose to drive 45 in it and yak on my phone, so don't bother passing me or anything.

BMW 745iL Protection- This car is bulletproof, wanna see?

Cadillac SRX - Damn it! It's not a station wagon!

Chevrolet Aveo - I live in fear of anyone running a red light.

Chrysler PT Cruiser Limited - I don't mind spending $25K on a Neon station wagon with chrome wheels and leather.

Dodge Neon SRT-4 - But, but, but officer, why can't I make left turns on red?

Dodge Ram 2500HD (Cummins turbodiesel) - Hey buddy, see that Bimmer 745 over there? I hear them's a bullet-proofed! Let's go find out!!! *racks 12-gauge previously mounted in cab back window*

Eagle Premier - You know, these bus passes are a damn good deal, I wonder if my mechanic lives on the busline, too?

Eagle Talon - No, that's not a blown head gasket, it's condensation. I just need to keep telling myself that.

Ford Aspire - Just eight more payments to Honest Al's Bargain Beater Bin...just eight more...and I can get a real car...

Ford Escort ZX2 - see Honda Civic

Ford Focus wagon (white) - I'm delivering toxic substances for a living and loving every minute of it.

Ford Taurus SHO - Excuse me, I have another call coming through *beep* Hello? Well, buzz off! *beep* I knew I shouldn't have put my phone number on that "For Sale" sign.

Ford Expedition Eddie Bauer - DWF, 32, 3 kids, 5'0", 100lbs, cell phone implanted on side of head, soccer ball stickers on back window.

Ford Excursion - I like getting on my $39.99 Wal-Mart CB radio to talk to truckers while I refuel at the diesel island.

Geo Metro 3-cylinder automatic - I keep a change of underwear in the glove compartment in case I need to get on the Interstate.

Honda Insight - Luggage space? We don't need no stinkin' luggage space?!!

Honda CR-V - Have you hugged a tree today?

Kia Rio - Do you have a job? Do you have $199? Do you want to take the bus and drive rental cars for the next 5 years? Then come by XXX Kia and we'll get you approved for a *NEW* Kia Rio!!!

Lincoln Navigator - I have two LCD screens for every passenger seating position and more dB than God. I hire men to spin my rims while my car sits in valet parking at the strip clubs. You can't touch this.

Mazda Millenia - I think I got a good deal at the tote-the-note lot, I mean, it's got leather, right?

Mercury Topaz - I can change an ignition module in three minutes and twenty seconds flat.

Mitsubishi Eclipse - see Eagle Talon

Mitsubishi Montero Limited - My 20-inch rims are on backorder. Really.

Mini Cooper - I don't mind eating bologna and cheese all week as long as I can valet park this baby at the club!

Oldsmobile Alero - No, son, this is just a rental car, I would never really *own* one of these...*sheepish grimace and shifty eyes*

Plymouth Prowler - No honey, I really don't want any more children.

Pontiac Aztek - My bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 is in the console fridge, and my girlfriend is passed out in the back seat.

Saab 9000 - Excuse me, do you have a pair of wire strippers handy? How about some tape? Gauze? Fire extinguisher?

Sterling 825/827 - see Saab 9000

Toyota Matrix or Scion xA or xB - It's not a Corolla station wagon, it isn't, hey, quit teasing me!

Toyota MR2 Spyder - You know I have this car in my garage AND in GT2 on my Playstation!

Volkswagen New Beetle - If you're going to San Francisco, make sure to wear a flower in your dash-mounted vase.

Volkswagen Jetta TDI - Gas stations? We don't need no stinking gas stations?!!

Volvo 740 Turbodiesel - see Saab 9000

Yugo GV - I rebuilt my engine last month. Want to help me do it again?

Yugo GV - I rebuilt my engine last month. Want to help me do it again?
hahahaaha

Loool, that 280Z one was GREAT!

Thats great! The Geo 3-cyl is the BEST! Funny stuff

Lincoln Navigator - I have two LCD screens for every passenger seating position and more dB than God. I hire men to spin my rims while my car sits in valet parking at the strip clubs. You can't touch this.



lmao that is great...i know people like that, but not so rich lol

whut my car says about me...

1972 dodge dart,"i drive a bucket!"

Shit, this is an old thread. Please dont post in old threads.