I Need Your Advice!!!! Please Help!!!!

ok so today i was driving and my mom said i "pulled out in front of someone", which i may have done, but there was at least 5 car-lengths between me and that car. anyway, she starts yelling at me and crap like that, and i tried to say sorry, but she just kept yelling. so we get home, she exaggerates the story and tells my stepdad, and he comes into my room and saysi have to make up my mind: either give him ALL of my videogames that have ANY form of driving in them, or keep the games and give him my drivers permit. he says me playing racing games makes me a bad driver. now, its not like all i do is play xbox. in the last month ive played MAYBE 10 hours total. but i am a serious car guy and all of my games are driving games. (forza motorsport and sega gt2002) this just doesnt seem fair or right to me. what should i do?

Well, no offense, kiddo, but it's not really up to you to say or do anything... You may be an enthusiast, and live and breathe cars, but you haven't been driving as long. You might just have to suck it up and deal with the fact that your mom feels you cut someone off. Learn to live by their interpretation of "the rules" until you are old enough to make your own decision on what is and isn't appropriate.

Sorry to not take your side, but... as a teacher, I've seen WAY too many kids who think they are invincible. Maybe it is for your own good.

I agree with Tangie.

Unless you don't want to learn to drive, give up your stupid games....

And listen to Tangie.

I'll go against the grain on this one and say that its crap what they are requesting of you. Now, only you, your mom, and the person whom you 'cut off' know if you really did cut them off or if you had enough room to change lanes. I think its ridiculous for someone to blame/assume that videogames are the cause for teens driving bad or killing other people. Your stepdad was not there and has no conclusive evidence linking your videogames to your driving. All he has to go on is your mom's word against yours. And no body here can argue otherwise either. Sorry, no advice, but I do see how unreasonable your situation is.

What the effin hell. I don't want to be mean, but your parents thinking videogames are making you bad driver might have to top the list of one dumbest things I've ever heard.

Being UNEXPERIENCED is what makes you bad driver, or so it seems. Like everyone else said, just give up the games. Then just hope your parents stop being so anal and find the right solution.

I'll go against the grain on this one and say that its crap what they are requesting of you. Now, only you, your mom, and the person whom you 'cut off' know if you really did cut them off or if you had enough room to change lanes. I think its ridiculous for someone to blame/assume that videogames are the cause for teens driving bad or killing other people. Your stepdad was not there and has no conclusive evidence linking your videogames to your driving. All he has to go on is your mom's word against yours. And no body here can argue otherwise either. Sorry, no advice, but I do see how unreasonable your situation is.


Just now saw this after my post, but I highly agree. What they're doing just really rubs me the wrong way. I mean hell, everyone came out fine, shit like that happens when you're just starting off, the only way to get better is more seat time. Sorry man, your parents are being dicks on this one.

How old are you?

Here's what you do. Give up the video games, and then steal their car. When they report it stolen and the cops try to pull you over, run from them. Then crash the car into a light pole. That way, you'll show them that you're a crappy driver with or without video games. Just wait till you see the looks on their faces when they find out they were wrong!

Here's what you do. Give up the video games, and then steal their car. When they report it stolen and the cops try to pull you over, run from them. Then crash the car into a light pole. That way, you'll show them that you're a crappy driver with or without video games. Just wait till you see the looks on their faces when they find out they were wrong!

:1:

That is a good idea to get arrested, and have ur licence taken away.

I got my learners GDL and I aint pro, but you cant link playing san andreas to driving a real car, unless you want to get killed.

well, :2cents: , back seat drivers or even shotgunners do NOT control the car, the driver does. From what I've gleaned, it simply is perspective. A more experiencied driver states an opinion of your driving. It appears U are inexperienced, but reasonably competent. Reasonably is the key word, as WELL as inexperienced. Mix the two, and listen to the bitching, take it. They are telling ya what ya may not have seen, from their years of driving. Make peace, acknowledge their intentions to them, all good.

Beyond that, U control the car, but, dude/gal, listen and learn from those who have put a few 100K under their drive-belts. They've been there, trying to keep you from going there, K? They just looking out for you, although the game-thing seems weird to me. Of course, we didn't have those games when I started driving. There's a point to come.

Granted, I'm an older driver, but in my day of youth I wished I'd listened to what my folks told me. Case in point, this is true~~~~~~ about 17 at the time, took the folk's car out to see the g/f then. Was told, bad roads, be very careful [by my folks].

K, it doesn't quite follow your situation, but could have. Anyhoo, took the car, grabbed the g/f and her g/f for a drive. Bad roads, but f* it, I was invincible and certain i could handle a bad road. NOT!!!!!!!!!! Bashed in the passenger door on a tree, hurt the g/f's g/f, thankfully not bad at all, but I was F'ing lucky as H. I could have messed her up bad for life. Just because I felt I knew what I was doing. My folks knew better, and I ignored their cautions.

Upshot, one heavily damaged car, dad lost his ride to work and back, family lost their [our] transporaion for several weeks. THINK about it when folks say this or that re driving, you have control, and YOU take the full responsibility for what occurs. Don't let it be as bad as mine was.

And you think your consequences are rough????? Sorry. I won't even go into the consequences I faced and had to deal with. Losing a video game privilege is minor crap compared to what I went through.

And, thankfully, U didn't. yea, it's not a good analogy, but it could have been, in the blink of an eye.

I would rather loose those video games over driving anyday. My parents are similar, but they have reasons with me, but they hate my driving, they think Im always driving too fast even if im only doing 20mph, but thats parents for ya, learn to deal with it and talk to your parents about it

I would rather loose those video games over driving anyday.

:1:

Still, racing games make you a better driver IF they do anything at all. They teach you to find the safest way through a turn and to avoid any kind of collision at all costs, even if it means slowing down.

:1:

Still, racing games make you a better driver IF they do anything at all. They teach you to find the safest way through a turn and to avoid any kind of collision at all costs, even if it means slowing down.Yea, I think Forza has tought me that beter than any other game, I'd rather have both, but in his case, I'd like to drive for real. Racing games are fun though.

I'll grant you 2 that maybe videogames help you out, but only the learn the extreme basics. Only seat time, and seat time only will make you a better driver, granted you don't have some full blown racing simulator. Anyways, I still think this guy's parents are idiots....

I'll grant you 2 that maybe videogames help you out, but only the learn the extreme basics. Only seat time, and seat time only will make you a better driver, granted you don't have some full blown racing simulator. Anyways, I still think this guy's parents are idiots....

Yea idiots, just like mine, but hey w/e, im gettin used to it, and learning to cope with mine. Id rather have seat time learning this stuff than video games for sure, but when I can't drive because I am only supposed to use my car for work, and i cant learn says my mom in a different manner, I will play the video games.

Well ofcourse parents are going to be cautious about letting their kids drive all the time, I just think completely barring him from it makes absolutely no sense. I learned driving by using my dad's car while he sat in the passenger seat and we went down roads that weren't busy. Then again, I learned to drive when I was 11, but I was never fully allowed or trusted to drive alone until I was nearly 18 years old.

My mom has taken my car away plenty of times, and she will not let me get better by driving on deserted roads or parking lots. She says its illegal and a waste of time. I just wanna tell her BS. But Id get in so much trouble if I did. She wont let me get a 240 because its rear wheel drive and I want the manual. I told her that I would just need to learn, I already know how to drive a manual. She don't care, she looks at what could happen, all of the bad things. W/e I say.

Sucks, but like ya said, not much you can do about it. Luckily my parents trusted me somewhat to be responsible. My first car (this Eclipse) was the first I ever drove that was manual, but ofcourse my dad wouldn't let me get the turbo version. They just figured its something cheap, sporty, not too fast and safe because of it being FF. They were pretty much right, lol.

A couple thoughts here.
1) If I have to slow down, because somebody pulls out in front of me, then I view it as cutting me off. So granted, they may have been 5 car lengths away, and in a 25mph zone that is space enough...in a 45mph that may not be. And your mother has been driving longer and so she has more experience looking at a car and figuring out how fast it is going to cover the distance. It's just life. I remember when I first got my license, I would wait longer than normal to make a left into traffic, just because what may have been an appropriate gap for others, wasn't for me, becuase I misjudged people's rates of speed all the time. It's just something that comes with experience. The more you drive, the better you will get at it. I'm not saying you are wrong or your mother is right...I'm just saying, perhaps she is...don't take it personally, just learn from it. Everybody makes mistakes while learning. If you didn't this time, you will sometime. Just try not to do it again, and then it was a positive..not a negative.

2) For this reason though, I took driving courses with an instructor that I didn't know. That way he teaches me, free of judgement. I'm just a client to him, he's just an instructor to me. The lesson doesn't go home. The first time I drove with my mom we got into a fight. I realized right then and there, I didn't want to learn to drive from her. Sure it costs more, but I considered it money well spent.

3) When I was significantly younger, I got into some serious trouble once and my mom kinda did the same thing. Her first reaction was 'you're a good kid...it must be the movies' Parents don't want to think of thier kids as anything less than perfect, and htey don't want mistakes to be blamed on their parenting. It's easier to cop out and blame music, movies, video games, etc. I'm sure you've heard of this before if you've listened to a single Eminem cd in your life. Anyway, she tried to take all of my rated 'R' movies (I had a huge movie collection..still do). I flipped out and after we both argued, we finally sat down adn to the best of our ability had a normal talk where I explained that I'm a kid, I'm gonna make mistakes, but it's a cop out to blame movies adn such. Ask them what you did wrong, ask them what would have been the appropriate response. Show them that you care and want to learn from it. Once that is accomplished, talk about the video games in a calm manner and explain that you don't consider them an influence in your driving. You understand they aren't real, and that speeds and driving like that are dangerous adn beyond your ability at this time. Don't argue...talk rationally. With any luck, you can convince them that you are responsible and that the games aren't influencing your driving.

Since you're 15 and in your parents' home for another 3 years at least, seems your decision is to drive a real car or to drive videogame cars.

I'd choose the real car hands down.

:1: for the experience thing, and I think that everyone would agree that it is far better to be TOO safe than not safe enough. You might have had plenty of room to pull out or you might not have. Better to chill out and wait for another 20 seconds than to be wrong and get hit, isn't it?

tell them to take the games, and say you want help to become a better driver.

when you go out driving, make it obvious you're looking around, checking your mirrors etc so they notice. drive slowly, show concentraion (as in, don't go yapping away the whole time) if you want, talk through what you're doing as you do it (you have to do that for the GB licnece test).

basically, show some responsibility and make it obvious you're taking the neccessary care and using the right attention.

keeping the games is basically saying "yeah, i'm a crap driver, i don't want to get any better"

sometimes, your parents need you to make a decision like this where you choose to improve istead of standing down and admitting total defeat.

Right. Good points 2.2.

Then, after a few months of good driving, ask for a game back if you're still interested.

Someone commented that driving games help you learn how to drive. They teach you how to drive a driving game, and maybe how to take lines around corners. They also "teach" you that your car isn't damaged and you are not injured, no matter how hard you hit anything.....

Wow, talk about ironic. My stupid step dad took my car keys because he thinks I have a ton af tea spoons in my room from eating pudding and ice cream in my room. I had 3 and I took them out before he got home. I told him that and he doesn't care. He still thinks I have more in my room.:banghead: And I just fixxed my car yesterday after almost two weeks of a broken track bar, no driving.

Is your stepdad bipolar by any chance?

you stepdad is worried about you stealing spoons?

who are you? saladfingers?

most parents worry that their kids are doing drungs and stuff..

Is your stepdad bipolar by any chance? I don't think so, but who knows.

you stepdad is worried about you stealing spoons?

who are you? saladfingers?

most parents worry that their kids are doing drungs and stuff..Thats what I thought, as far as I know they know I don't drink much (if they know that I do very little, don't like to get drunk, I think getting drunk is kinda stupid, but a few), and they know I don't do drugs (don't know that I've tried some though). I really can't wait for the next 4 months to go by. 18 here I come.

Took your truck for leaving out some spoons... I have to say I'm pleasantly suprised to find out how normal my parents are.

When my parents gave me my car, they dumped all responsibility on me besides paying insurance. So everytime it needed gas, repairs, or even upgrades, it was all me.

Took your truck for leaving out some spoons... I have to say I'm pleasantly suprised to find out how normal my parents are.

When my parents gave me my car, they dumped all responsibility on me besides paying insurance. So everytime it needed gas, repairs, or even upgrades, it was all me.I got all of the responsibility of my car, and when I said its not worth it to fix here a few days ago, and wanted a new car, my parents said if i did that and junked this one (not worth to resell) I had to pay them back the $400 that they helped pay for and was told I didnt have to pay orriginally. What ever. I'll just go do what I need to to get my 240sx and a place to stay when I turn 18.

Well goodluck, I've been wanting a 240 since I was 17, I'm now 19 and going 20 towards the end of this year. I'm probally just gonna get a FD once I get settled in doing my military doo-tayzzzz.

Well, by the tim I turn 18 at the end of may, I should have enough saved up to buy the 240 the first week of june, I've got about half saved up now, and I want a little extra so I can move out right away.