Ouch!

I’ve got a great big mouth ulcer and it stings everytime I eat. :cry: :( Probably doesn’t help that I just had soy sauce on my rice and now I’m eating a mandarin. :rolleyes:

Mouth........ulcer? Ouch! :eek:

So you're just pouring salt on your own wound. STOP THAT













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Originally posted by YogsVR4
So you're just pouring salt on your own wound. STOP THAT Apparently that’s one of the things that’s supposed to make them heal quicker. Bugger that! Last time I did that I almost hit the roof! :cry:

Try this...

Take a odd-fashioned tumbler glass. Pour in 30 millilitres of 18 year old Glenmorangie Sherry Finish Single Malt Scotch, add a up to 10 millilitres of cold spring water if desired. Slowly draw a sip into mouth and circulate gently in mouth, repeating action until mixture is exhausted.

Repeat as necessary if pain persists.

I haven't had an ulcer in a while but I'm repeating this procedure on a regular basis to absolutely make sure I don't get one - purely for medicinal purposes of course.

OH! I KNOW! DON'T USE HOT SAUCE! IF YOU DO, THEN DON'T TOUCH YOUR EYES AFTERWARD!!! :eek::eek::eek:


















:rolleyes: :p

Take it from me... do not, I repeat, do not chew it off...

Originally posted by Damien
OH! I KNOW! DON'T USE HOT SAUCE! IF YOU DO, THEN DON'T TOUCH YOUR EYES AFTERWARD!!! :eek::eek::eek:


:rolleyes: :p Bite me! :finger:

Replicant - I can't stand the taste of Scotch, so unfortunately that's out. :(

ci5ic - OUCH!!!! :eek:

dissolve some salt in a glass full of water and swirl that around your mouth, spit water out and repeat.

Salty water is good for healing sores / cuts in the mouth

Originally posted by tazdev
dissolve some salt in a glass full of water and swirl that around your mouth, spit water out and repeat.

Salty water is good for healing sores / cuts in the mouth But salt hurts! :cry: :(

Hmmmmm.... Well if you don't like Scotch... try one of these...

recipe 1 - Chocolate Martini

Take a Boston shaker, fill with ice. Add a 3 count pour of Swedish Absolut Vodka (1...2...3...). Add a 3 count pour of Butterscotch Schapps... (1...2...3...).

Stir with a long spoon (DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SHAKE THIS MIXTURE AS YOU WILL BRUISE THE VODKA).

Decant mixture into a chilled martini glass. Add a Hershey's Kiss and finish with 15 mls of White Creme de Cacao. The chilled mixture will cool the ulcer and the alcohol is antiseptic. Drink enough and I'm sure you'll forget about it quickly enough...

recipe 2 - Cuban Mojito

Take a tall glass, muddle several sprigs of mint (ie crush). Add a 3 count pour of Havana Club Gold Cuban Rum. Fill glass with ice, add a dash of Fresh Lime Juice and top with soda. (Errol Flynn's favourite cocktail)...

Originally posted by replicant_008
Hmmmmm.... Well if you don't like Scotch... try one of these...

recipe 1 - Chocolate Martini

Take a Boston shaker, fill with ice. Add a 3 count pour of Swedish Absolut Vodka (1...2...3...). Add a 3 count pour of Butterscotch Schapps... (1...2...3...).

Stir with a long spoon (DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SHAKE THIS MIXTURE AS YOU WILL BRUISE THE VODKA).

Decant mixture into a chilled martini glass. Add a Hershey's Kiss and finish with 15 mls of White Creme de Cacao. The chilled mixture will cool the ulcer and the alcohol is antiseptic. Drink enough and I'm sure you'll forget about it quickly enough...

recipe 2 - Cuban Mojito

Take a tall glass, muddle several sprigs of mint (ie crush). Add a 3 count pour of Havana Club Gold Cuban Rum. Fill glass with ice, add a dash of Fresh Lime Juice and top with soda. (Errol Flynn's favourite cocktail)... First one sounds good to me! :D

First off - mouth ulcer is another term for a cancher sore, I presume?

Secondly (assuming my assumption listed above is correct) - I agree with TazDev's advice. What I usually do is apply some baking soda to the wound before bed. I usually awake with a little white crusty at the corner of my mouth, but I find that this does hale in faster healing. This has a similar effect as TazDev's method.

Mix 3 parts Mountain Dew, 2 parts Peanuts, and 1 part Carmex for cold sores. Then throw away the resulting sludg and procede QUICKLY to the nearest field. Face due north and turn around counter clockwise three times, no more then three as that is the procedure for getting more cold sores. After completing the third turn gargle with some salt water and go home.

if it hurts when you eat, don't eat, duh :D

Originally posted by Gonthrax
Mix 3 parts Mountain Dew, 2 parts Peanuts, and 1 part Carmex for cold sores. Then throw away the resulting sludg and procede QUICKLY to the nearest field. Face due north and turn around counter clockwise three times, no more then three as that is the procedure for getting more cold sores. After completing the third turn gargle with some salt water and go home.
Works best if you hum the 'James Bond' theme very loud while gargling.;)

Good to see Goonthrax came back......:D

James Bond Theme...
Just to clarify the Moby One or the Original One?

Besides which Spec2 is in the Southern Hemisphere so shouldn't she face south and rotate clockwise three times.... Otherwise the gargle would be in a descending spiral not an ascending spiral and she'd be squinting into the sun...

Gonthrax... you need to remember that the water rotates anti-clockwise down the drain in the shower down under... And that moss grows on the south facing side of the beech tree...

Spec2 Girl- A mandarin AND Soy sauce, all I can say is that you are a sucker for punishment :eek:

I get 'em all the time :(

Originally posted by replicant_008
James Bond Theme...
Just to clarify the Moby One or the Original One?



Neither...The Art Of Noise version is by far the most effective.:D

My solution to this one would be to slowly consume one shot of tequila. Repeat until pain diminishes. Salt will be a bitch though...

On another note, welcome back Gonthrax. OT has missed you.

I know what ya mean .......I've had them quite a lot recently.....Ice - cream helps....plus drinking lots of water ...flushes your system......

plus I've found this anesthetic for mouth ulcers form the chemists which stings like hell for about 10 secs but gives about a couple of hours of Pain relief as it numbs whereever the ulcer is....best to apply it just b4 eatin :)

Originally posted by replicant_008

Gonthrax... you need to remember that the water rotates anti-clockwise down the drain in the shower down under... And that moss grows on the south facing side of the beech tree...

Nooooo I've screwed it all up! I don't know what thats the formula for on the south side of the equator... I hope it's nothing bad:(

Thanks for the love guys, I'll try to be around more :) I missed ya'lls :D

No matter... I'm still trying to figure out what the hell kind of spell these groups of women keep doing at nightclubs. They all gather in a circle, throw their handbags into a heap in the middle, take off their shoes and continue to dance around them to ABBA and drinking large quantities of alcohol...

Is this a fertility dance or something?

Originally posted by replicant_008
No matter... I'm still trying to figure out what the hell kind of spell these groups of women keep doing at nightclubs. They all gather in a circle, throw their handbags into a heap in the middle, take off their shoes and continue to dance around them to ABBA and drinking large quantities of alcohol...

Is this a fertility dance or something?

could well be. Don't break the circle or a hex will be placed on you and your family:eek:

Personally, I like replicant's suggestion. I think I better try that a bit more often. I reckon Laphroaig would get rid of them a bit quicker though, cos of all the peat :devil:

Hmm I don't get mouth ulcers often, but my way of fixing them is much more simple.

I just leave it, its only pain. I know in a few days it will heal naturally.

If it doesn't go away, or I get bored at school. I'll get a pen and stab it, till it becomes smaller. Yes that does sound weird, but oh well....

sarujin

[billy connoly]wire brush and Dettol![/billy connolly]:eek:

Originally posted by sarujin
If it doesn't go away, or I get bored at school. I'll get a pen and stab it, till it becomes smaller. Yes that does sound weird, but oh well....

sarujin

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:

"sounds weird" doesn't even begin to cover it. That's just not right.

okay maybe its more then weird.

They work the same way as pimples, if you stab them with something the inside (pus or whatever it is) can then leak out. Thus the sore goes away.

sarujin

Originally posted by moondog
Personally, I like replicant's suggestion. I think I better try that a bit more often. I reckon Laphroaig would get rid of them a bit quicker though, cos of all the peat :devil: Peat!!!! And people actually drink and like this stuff??? :apuke: :uhoh:


:p

Originally posted by Spec2 Girl
Peat!!!! And people actually drink and like this stuff??? :apuke: :uhoh:


:p

och aye :buck

The peat is used to slow toast the malt adding a smoky, rich, toasty signature. Being peat it burns with a low, smoky consistent heat making it ideal for the slow, careful process of gently toasting the malt.

The malt is the sprouted grain of barley where the starch contained in the grain has been transformed by germination to sugar. The toasted malt grains are then ground and the pure water from a highland burn or spring is added to make the 'wash.'

The wash is then left to ferment before being distilled in graceful long necked copper stills - not once but twice to ensure only the best liquors are extracted from the fermented wash.

After distillation, the spirit is put into barrels - mainly used American Oak Bourbon Casks but sometimes used Spanish Sherry, Madiera or Portugese Sherry Barriques to mature for at least 10 years in bonded warehouses for maturation. In this final process, the spirit will inherit the smooth character of the oak before the final process of bottling.

What's not to like about that ?

Still doesn't appeal to me! It smells disgusting too. :apuke:

:p

Well I could tell you about the time I had a 'winter tonic' in China.... this involved rice alcohol and the internal organs of a live snake...

Now that was truly nasty... but you're lucky only guys get to have this...

If there's one thing I can say about Replicant, it's that SOB knows his alcohol!

I used to get them all the time when I had braces back-in-the-day... Anytime I got hit in the mouth with something, I'd get a row of them right on top of the braces, and the braces would just exacerbate them even more...

I usually swished hydrogen peroxide around in my mouth, helped them heal quicker. For immediate pain relief, especially before eating, I would use Orajel or Anbesol (or similar) local anesthetic gel. Only problem with those was I had a tendency to bite my numb tongue or cheek. :p

Originally posted by ci5ic
I usually swished hydrogen peroxide around in my mouth, helped them heal quicker. For immediate pain relief, especially before eating, I would use Orajel or Anbesol (or similar) local anesthetic gel. Only problem with those was I had a tendency to bite my numb tongue or cheek. :p Which then gives you more ulcers! :p It's still really painful and was bleeding before. Wish it would just go away! :(

Maybe I should put some of these remedies in my sig???

What ya think Spec2? :p

Originally posted by Damien
Maybe I should put some of these remedies in my sig???

What ya think Spec2? :p It's your sig! :finger:

:p

And what's wrong with knowing something about alcohol ?

I have quite a few friends who make, sell, market the stuff and I used to work in hospo a while back (not to mention quite a few who work in hospo)...

Geeza, replicant is one smart mutha, yo...

Originally posted by replicant_008
And what's wrong with knowing something about alcohol ?

I have quite a few friends who make, sell, market the stuff and I used to work in hospo a while back (not to mention quite a few who work in hospo)...

Ain't nuttin' wrong wit dat! I wish I knew that much... Actually, I think that all-around you are a very intelligent person, not just in regards to alcohol. :sun:

Originally posted by replicant_008
The peat is used to slow toast the malt adding a smoky, rich, toasty signature. Being peat it burns with a low, smoky consistent heat making it ideal for the slow, careful process of gently toasting the malt.

The malt is the sprouted grain of barley where the starch contained in the grain has been transformed by germination to sugar. The toasted malt grains are then ground and the pure water from a highland burn or spring is added to make the 'wash.'

The wash is then left to ferment before being distilled in graceful long necked copper stills - not once but twice to ensure only the best liquors are extracted from the fermented wash.

After distillation, the spirit is put into barrels - mainly used American Oak Bourbon Casks but sometimes used Spanish Sherry, Madiera or Portugese Sherry Barriques to mature for at least 10 years in bonded warehouses for maturation. In this final process, the spirit will inherit the smooth character of the oak before the final process of bottling.

What's not to like about that ?

A-MEN!! :D :D

As long as it's not destroyed by being blended.. :rolleyes: :apuke: :bloated:

Originally posted by ci5ic


Ain't nuttin' wrong wit dat! I wish I knew that much... Actually, I think that all-around you are a very intelligent person, not just in regards to alcohol. :sun:

indeed:coolguy: