the man store

Somewhere in New York a store opened up on the corner that sold husbands. Now, this store was six stories tall and as you entered you saw a sign that read like this:

WELCOME TO THE HUSBAND STORE
RULES:
you can enter the store only once.
every time you go up a floor, the men get better.
once you leave a floor to go to the next, you can't come back down.

On the first floor was a sign that read:

These men have jobs.

On the second floor there was a sign that read:

These men have jobs and love kids.

Third floor:

These men have jobs, love kids and are good looking.

4th floor:

These men have jobs, love kids, and are drop dead gorgeous.

5th floor:

These men have jobs, love kids, are drop dead gorgeous, and celebrities.

And on the 6th floor:

There are no men on this floor. It exists simply to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for visiting the husband store.



Now, across the street, a WIFE store opened up. The rules for this store are exactly the same as the rules for the husband store.

On the first floor there was a sign that read:

These women love sex.

On the second floor:

These women love sex and have money.

The third through sixth floors have never been visited.


:icon16:

lol. Aint that the truth though.

:lol: nice !!!!

thats some funny stuff. lol.

and further proof women are better at life than men. we make money by the second floor. by floor 6, you boys have yet to have any money mentioned. think you're going to get by on your looks? pff right..:icon16:

and further proof women are better at life than men. we make money by the second floor. by floor 6, you boys have yet to have any money mentioned. think you're going to get by on your looks? pff right..:icon16:

Ahem, aren't you the one calling members of this board hot?

Ahem, aren't you the one calling members of this board hot?
which one? i've done it more than once lol and it doesn't matter anyways, women are still the more capable sex.

which one? i've done it more than once lol and it doesn't matter anyways, women are still the more capable sex.

..says the common lesbian

i can't believe you just called me a lesbian. just because i think women are better doesn't make me a lesbian feminist. :screwy:

which one? i've done it more than once lol and it doesn't matter anyways, women are still the more capable sex.

The only one I can think of off the top of my head is KustmAce. But, come on! Who doesnt want to bang him? I'm with RS 92...says the common lesbian. Feminism is cute but its grown up time and the men are talking.

i can't believe you just called me a lesbian. just because i think women are better doesn't make me a lesbian feminist. :screwy:

..Yes it does, but in reality no sex is better over another. While we have the superbowl you guys have.. periods. :lol:

hah. periods suck but at least we don't have to worry about our body advertising to the world when we're horny.

Yeah that does suck but some guys dont have such a problem.

hah. periods suck but at least we don't have to worry about our body advertising to the world when we're horny.

At least we don't suffer from premature ejaculation...think about that one

At least we don't suffer from premature ejaculation...think about that one
what? i thought you were a guy. some guys have that problem. so saying "we don't" infers you're a girl.. :confused:

and further proof women are better at life than men. we make money by the second floor. by floor 6, you boys have yet to have any money mentioned. think you're going to get by on your looks? pff right..:icon16:


So basically what you're saying is that you're shallow because you get your self esteem from money:grinyes:

what? i thought you were a guy. some guys have that problem. so saying "we don't" infers you're a girl.. :confused:

When a dude "busts one", he's happy. It doesn't matter how little time it took to get there. There may be a really pissed off woman, but men don't suffer from premature ejaculation...women do

When a dude "busts one", he's happy. It doesn't matter how little time it took to get there. There may be a really pissed off woman, but men don't suffer from premature ejaculation...women do
haha!! soooo true. it sucks. but i have seen a guy burst into tears afterwards. that was kinda weird lol

Wow, the only poeple who can hold a conversation around ejaculation...gotta love AF

The only one I can think of off the top of my head is KustmAce. But, come on! Who doesnt want to bang him? I'm with RS 92...says the common lesbian. Feminism is cute but its grown up time and the men are talking.

i love you guys too

Wow, this is on interesting thread.....hahaha

Funny joke, obscure thread

:iamwithst

Could've been a good thread if it weren't for attention whores.

And on the 6th floor:

There are no men on this floor. It exists simply to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for visiting the husband store.



your philosophy is quite....aaaaaaahh forget it....


man you don't need a 6th floor to figure that out.

hah. periods suck but at least we don't have to worry about our body advertising to the world when we're horny.

What do you mean......................?


:sly:

^
Our boners stick out, while girls can hide in the bush with out anyone knowing they have the hots

lol

^
Our boners stick out, while girls can hide in the bush with out anyone knowing they have the hots

lol
Yeah, but then again unless they wear a sweater they can't hide the high-beams.

Nice! :lol:

To end the argument, here's 100 reasons why men are better:


1.there is no ..1 reason, and that's okay
2.Movie nudity is virtually always female
3.Child birth
4.A five day vacation requires only one suitcase
5.Monday Night Football
6.Belching is cool
7.Your bathroom lines are always 80% shorter
8.You can open all your own jars
9.Old friends don't give a crap if you've lost or gained weight
10.Dry cleaners and haircutters don't rob you blind
11.Screw up the laundry once, never allowed to do it again
12.Your ass is never a factor in a job interview
13.All your orgasms are real
14.Those chairs by the waiting room at lingerie shops are for you
15.Guys in hockey masks don't attack you
16.You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go
17.You can still get away with MAKING a Valentine's day card
18.You can go to the bathroom without a support group
19.Your last name stays put
20.You can understand Homer Simpson
21.You never get a stupid Love Quiz in GQ
22.You can kill your own food
23.The garage is all yours
24.You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
25.Big Breasted Stripper days on Jerry Springer
26.We're treated like royalty when we're sick
27.You never have to clean the toilet
28.You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes
29.Sex means never worrying about your reputation
30.Wedding plans take care of themselves
31.If someone forgets to invite you to something he or she is still your friend
32.Your underwear is $10 for a three pack
33.The National College Cheerleading Championship.
34.None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry
35.You don't have to shave below the neck
36.Scratching your ass is just fine
37.If you're 34 and single nobody notices
38.You can write your name in snow
39.Beer is a food group
40.Everything on your face stays its original colour
41.Chocolate is just another snack
42.You can be president
43.Going to the gym to look at the aerobic girls is called 'working out'
44.Flowers fix everything
45.You never have to worry about other people's feelings
46.You get to think about sex 90% of the day
47.You can wear a white shirt to a water park
48.Three pairs of shoes are enough
49.You can eat a banana in a hardware store
50.A 'mood swing' is a place, with a swing, where you get sex.
51.Foreplay is optional
52.Falling asleep right after sex
53.Nobody stops telling a dirty joke when you walk into the room
54.You can whip your shirt off on a hot day
55.Middle aged, big gut? No problem, it's expected.
56.Underwear lasts longer than most marriages
57.Car mechanics tell the truth
58.The belly button is a fantastic place to store corn chip crumbs
59.You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for hours without thinking: He must be mad at me
60.The world is your urinal
61.Wake up, shower, eat, brush your teeth, leave... max 15 minutes.
62.You get to jump up and slap stuff
63.Hotwax never comes near your pubic area
64.One mood, all the time
65.Your virginity is never 'taken' away. You'd gladly give it to anyone that asks.
66.Father-in-laws are sweet older men. Mother-in-laws are nasty old bitches.
67.You know at least twenty ways to open a beer bottle
68.You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing
69.Same work...more pay
70.Gray hair and wrinkles add character
71.You dont have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment
72.It's OK to marry a girl much younger than you if you have money
73.It's OK to cop a free feel when you cuddle.
74.With 400 million sperms per shot you could double the earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory
75.You never have to wear high heels.
76.Sometimes women will fight over you, and you get to watch
77.The remote is yours and yours alone
78.People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them
79.People never complain about men drivers
80.Drinking till you pass out is occasionally OK
81.Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers
82.You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mom
83.Breast augmentation on your wife is a gift to both of you
84.You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom
85.If you don't call your buddy when you say you will,he won't tell your friends you've changed
86.Someday you'll be a dirty old man, and you're looking forward to it.
87.You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F*** it!"
88.If an other guy shows up at the party in the same outfit you might become lifelong buddies
89.Dad always let you stay out late while your sister had to be in before midnight
90.The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected
91.You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood
92.You're expected to stink if you work out
93.If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room
94.New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet
95.If someone bothers you, you just don't talk to them and problem solved.
96.Telephone company commercials don't make you cry
97.Not liking a person does not eliminate having great sex with them
98.Girls play barbie. You had GI Joe
99.Baywatch
100.There is always a game on somewhere

wow, that was really long, sorry

WOOT! Post #50!

To end the argument, here's 100 reasons why men are better:


1.there is no ..1 reason, and that's okay
2.Movie nudity is virtually always female
3.Child birth
4.A five day vacation requires only one suitcase
5.Monday Night Football
6.Belching is cool
7.Your bathroom lines are always 80% shorter
8.You can open all your own jars
9.Old friends don't give a crap if you've lost or gained weight
10.Dry cleaners and haircutters don't rob you blind
11.Screw up the laundry once, never allowed to do it again
12.Your ass is never a factor in a job interview
13.All your orgasms are real
14.Those chairs by the waiting room at lingerie shops are for you
15.Guys in hockey masks don't attack you
16.You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go
17.You can still get away with MAKING a Valentine's day card
18.You can go to the bathroom without a support group
19.Your last name stays put
20.You can understand Homer Simpson
21.You never get a stupid Love Quiz in GQ
22.You can kill your own food
23.The garage is all yours
24.You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
25.Big Breasted Stripper days on Jerry Springer
26.We're treated like royalty when we're sick
27.You never have to clean the toilet
28.You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes
29.Sex means never worrying about your reputation
30.Wedding plans take care of themselves
31.If someone forgets to invite you to something he or she is still your friend
32.Your underwear is $10 for a three pack
33.The National College Cheerleading Championship.
34.None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry
35.You don't have to shave below the neck
36.Scratching your ass is just fine
37.If you're 34 and single nobody notices
38.You can write your name in snow
39.Beer is a food group
40.Everything on your face stays its original colour
41.Chocolate is just another snack
42.You can be president
43.Going to the gym to look at the aerobic girls is called 'working out'
44.Flowers fix everything
45.You never have to worry about other people's feelings
46.You get to think about sex 90% of the day
47.You can wear a white shirt to a water park
48.Three pairs of shoes are enough
49.You can eat a banana in a hardware store
50.A 'mood swing' is a place, with a swing, where you get sex.
51.Foreplay is optional
52.Falling asleep right after sex
53.Nobody stops telling a dirty joke when you walk into the room
54.You can whip your shirt off on a hot day
55.Middle aged, big gut? No problem, it's expected.
56.Underwear lasts longer than most marriages
57.Car mechanics tell the truth
58.The belly button is a fantastic place to store corn chip crumbs
59.You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for hours without thinking: He must be mad at me
60.The world is your urinal
61.Wake up, shower, eat, brush your teeth, leave... max 15 minutes.
62.You get to jump up and slap stuff
63.Hotwax never comes near your pubic area
64.One mood, all the time
65.Your virginity is never 'taken' away. You'd gladly give it to anyone that asks.
66.Father-in-laws are sweet older men. Mother-in-laws are nasty old bitches.
67.You know at least twenty ways to open a beer bottle
68.You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing
69.Same work...more pay
70.Gray hair and wrinkles add character
71.You dont have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment
72.It's OK to marry a girl much younger than you if you have money
73.It's OK to cop a free feel when you cuddle.
74.With 400 million sperms per shot you could double the earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory
75.You never have to wear high heels.
76.Sometimes women will fight over you, and you get to watch
77.The remote is yours and yours alone
78.People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them
79.People never complain about men drivers
80.Drinking till you pass out is occasionally OK
81.Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers
82.You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mom
83.Breast augmentation on your wife is a gift to both of you
84.You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom
85.If you don't call your buddy when you say you will,he won't tell your friends you've changed
86.Someday you'll be a dirty old man, and you're looking forward to it.
87.You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F*** it!"
88.If an other guy shows up at the party in the same outfit you might become lifelong buddies
89.Dad always let you stay out late while your sister had to be in before midnight
90.The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected
91.You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood
92.You're expected to stink if you work out
93.If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room
94.New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet
95.If someone bothers you, you just don't talk to them and problem solved.
96.Telephone company commercials don't make you cry
97.Not liking a person does not eliminate having great sex with them
98.Girls play barbie. You had GI Joe
99.Baywatch
100.There is always a game on somewhere

wow, that was really long, sorry
Great list.
Makes me glad that I'm male.
:evillol:

Aaaaaannd of course personality was mentioned NOWHERE... this society sucks :tongue:

Aaaaaannd of course personality was mentioned NOWHERE... this society sucks :tongue:
Personality is a no-no. :nono:

Grrrrrrrrreat list! Says tony the tiger.

Personality......isn't that like science or something?
Oh I know what it is. thats what we tell females we look for in a ideal mate
but what we really mean is a banging body, and no back talking.

Personality......isn't that like science or something?
Oh I know what it is. thats what we tell females we look for in a ideal mate
but what we really mean is a banging body, and no back talking.
True dat! :grinyes: True dat! :grinyes:

Lol.:lol:

As Richard Pryor once said, "bitch I got mine, go get yours." This goes back to an early conversation in the thread.

Why do women fake orgasms?
They think men care.

One more, yeah I know I'm a bad evil person.

How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
LMFAO!!
:rofl:

How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

:rofl: Thats awesome.

Personality......isn't that like science or something?
Oh I know what it is. thats what we tell females we look for in a ideal mate
but what we really mean is a banging body, and no back talking.

"No back talking" IS personality, dumbass. :)

and further proof women are better at life than men. we make money by the second floor. by floor 6, you boys have yet to have any money mentioned. think you're going to get by on your looks? pff right..:icon16:


Proof men are better right here :grinno:

We dont get pissy at jokes, we joke back. :smooch:

And come on! Brotha has a job, that means he has money. If a woman has more than $20 of her own were impressed!

Oh, and thing is, when some of us get excited, women get excited too from the sight. Women get excited and feel the need to play games so as of to not feel like a slut. Guys, any of you feel like a slut? :p

Eh.. c'mon, lighten up, she's just saying how she feels on the situation.

bro, that was a joke :rolleyes:

he seems decent enough so if I had a real problem with what she said I would pm her or something. Or simply just not read it again. :)

bro, that was a joke :rolleyes:

he seems decent enough so if I had a real problem with what she said I would pm her or something. Or simply just not read it again. :)

I know, I was only joking around too.. just trying to make you seem like an asshole. :icon16: Sadly, didnt work. :disappoin

bty, I meant she :uhoh:


guess I left off the s.....

Anyway :icon16: