Screwed up trans issue....

I have an 87 xj with the AW4 auto.. i have been hunting down the noise and i can't find it.. When i let off the gas at speeds of 40ish and above, i get a grumbling/rubbing sound. It is very load sensative meaning i can throw a bag of sand or another person in the car and it goes away, Also, it is temperature sensative. If it is above 50 outside, i get noise, if it is below 50, the noise seems to be gone.. To tell you the truth, the car feels like oatmeal and shifts slowely and overly smooth (like oatmeal) when it is above 50. When below, quiet, drives and shifts crisply... I know that load sensative points to gears, so i first went to the rearend, found it to be like shit, so i rebuilt it, still had noise, tore down the t-case, found all the bearings to be in good shape.. and gears not noticably worn. The Jeep has 120k on it and i just rebuilt the motor.. I am at a loss here, hopefully someone knows these trannys very well or has run into this before...

Check for a problem with the trans mount. They can be shifted, or broken, or even sagging. I have seen many produce a load sensitive grumbling noise. Have someone load it up in forward and reverse while you carefully watch for any metal contact. Look at the engine mounts too while your at it.

Is the fluid low or discolored at all?

motor and trans mounts are new.. heres something i forgot to post, i changed the fluid, no noise until 700 miles or so.. (had noise before too... same noise) but thats where i get the temp sensative thing.. the first day it made noise it was like 55 out.. and all days before it was 40 and under..... since that day it has been cold again and noise has been minimal to none... *confused*

Do you have a lift kit of some kind or other suspension work? The extra weight would cause the suspension to compress a bit more and alter the overall geometry (although, not by much). Maybe something's not aligned right. Can't imagine why the temp would make a diference.

I do have a 3 inch lift by rough country... i'm trying to think what could be out of alignment that would cause a noise such as that... i dont think that the driveline angles would be too extreme givin the size... Did i mention that i have massage chair style vibration on heavy accleleration? on a scale of one to ten i would rate the severety at around a 5.