funny stuff
ragt20
06-10-2002, 08:08 PM
An elderly gentleman went to see his doctor and asked for a prescription of Viagra. The doctor said, "That's no problem. How many do you want?"
The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The doctor said, "That won't do you any good."
The elderly gentleman said, "That's alright. I don't need them for sex anymore as I am over 90 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes."
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An 80-year-old man walks into a fertility clinic with his 75-year-old wife. He walks up to the doctor and tells him of their plan to have another child.
The doctor tells the man he'll need a sperm sample to see if that was possible. He hands the old man a plastic jar and tells him where to go. The old boy takes his wife by the hand and heads for the room.
Two hours later the doctor was begining to wonder if they would ever come out. The two finally emerged looking embarrassed.
"I tried with my left hand, I tried with my right hand, my wife tried with her teeth in, and she tried with her teeth out," cried the man. "But we still can't get the damn lid off this thing!"
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A guy walks into a bar and sits on a stool. in front of him he see's a big jar full of change and a little card that reads:
Hello, if you would like to win all of this money you have to make the horse at the end of the bar laugh.
COST $5
So, he puts in five dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Two minutes later they come out and the horse is laughing so hard that he pissed on the floor. So the guy takes the money and leaves.
The next day the same guy walks in the bar again and see's the horse and the jar, this time it says:
You can win all of this if you make the horse cry.
COST $10
So he puts in 10 dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Four minutes later they come out and the horse is crying like no body ever had.
So the guy takes the jar but before he could leave the bartender asks "How did you do that?"
The guy says "The first time I told him my willy was bigger than his and the second time I showed him!"
:lol2: :lol2:
:D
The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The doctor said, "That won't do you any good."
The elderly gentleman said, "That's alright. I don't need them for sex anymore as I am over 90 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An 80-year-old man walks into a fertility clinic with his 75-year-old wife. He walks up to the doctor and tells him of their plan to have another child.
The doctor tells the man he'll need a sperm sample to see if that was possible. He hands the old man a plastic jar and tells him where to go. The old boy takes his wife by the hand and heads for the room.
Two hours later the doctor was begining to wonder if they would ever come out. The two finally emerged looking embarrassed.
"I tried with my left hand, I tried with my right hand, my wife tried with her teeth in, and she tried with her teeth out," cried the man. "But we still can't get the damn lid off this thing!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A guy walks into a bar and sits on a stool. in front of him he see's a big jar full of change and a little card that reads:
Hello, if you would like to win all of this money you have to make the horse at the end of the bar laugh.
COST $5
So, he puts in five dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Two minutes later they come out and the horse is laughing so hard that he pissed on the floor. So the guy takes the money and leaves.
The next day the same guy walks in the bar again and see's the horse and the jar, this time it says:
You can win all of this if you make the horse cry.
COST $10
So he puts in 10 dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Four minutes later they come out and the horse is crying like no body ever had.
So the guy takes the jar but before he could leave the bartender asks "How did you do that?"
The guy says "The first time I told him my willy was bigger than his and the second time I showed him!"
:lol2: :lol2:
:D
Spec2 Girl
06-10-2002, 08:17 PM
Oh dear, he's at it again! :uhoh:
Make it stop!!!! :cry:
j/k :) :p
Make it stop!!!! :cry:
j/k :) :p
ragt20
06-10-2002, 08:19 PM
Originally posted by Spec2 Girl
Oh dear, he's at it again! :uhoh:
Make it stop!!!! :cry:
j/k :) :p
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2:
Oh dear, he's at it again! :uhoh:
Make it stop!!!! :cry:
j/k :) :p
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2:
Spec2 Girl
06-10-2002, 08:22 PM
Originally posted by ragt20
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2: I'm not admitting to anything! :D :p
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2: I'm not admitting to anything! :D :p
darkness
06-10-2002, 08:35 PM
Originally posted by ragt20
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2:
You know she does or else she wouldn't be posting in here.:D
:hehehe: come on ....you know you like em :lol2: :lol2:
You know she does or else she wouldn't be posting in here.:D
speediva
06-11-2002, 12:04 AM
:rolleyes: Some people really need to find something else to do!!! :right:
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