One for the ladies here
primera man
05-23-2002, 03:51 AM
My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will
make you happy tonight."
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all
over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in.
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you
the happiest woman in the world"
The woman says, "I'll miss you."
It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped
out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would
think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love
to you really badly.
She said - Well, you succeeded.
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board
while I sit on the sofa and fart.
He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery money I
gave you?
She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror you fat bastard.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour
make you happy tonight."
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all
over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in.
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you
the happiest woman in the world"
The woman says, "I'll miss you."
It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped
out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would
think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love
to you really badly.
She said - Well, you succeeded.
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board
while I sit on the sofa and fart.
He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery money I
gave you?
She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror you fat bastard.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour
Moppie
05-23-2002, 04:16 AM
Didn't I warn you about actualy talking to your wife? :rolleyes:
primera man
05-23-2002, 04:25 AM
Originally posted by Moppie
Didn't I warn you about actualy talking to your wife? :rolleyes:
She made me post it in here :bloated: :bloated:
Didn't I warn you about actualy talking to your wife? :rolleyes:
She made me post it in here :bloated: :bloated:
Moppie
05-23-2002, 04:32 AM
Originally posted by primera man
She made me post it in here :bloated: :bloated:
YOU SIR ARE WHIPPED! :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
She made me post it in here :bloated: :bloated:
YOU SIR ARE WHIPPED! :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
primera man
05-23-2002, 04:35 AM
Originally posted by Moppie
YOU SIR ARE WHIPPED! :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
On no son.......im on a promise tonight !!
YOU SIR ARE WHIPPED! :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
On no son.......im on a promise tonight !!
Moppie
05-23-2002, 04:42 AM
Originally posted by primera man
On no son.......im on a promise tonight !!
She letting you sleep at the foot of the bed with the dog, instead of on the couch with the cat huh?
:p :p
On no son.......im on a promise tonight !!
She letting you sleep at the foot of the bed with the dog, instead of on the couch with the cat huh?
:p :p
JD@af
05-23-2002, 05:16 AM
:) Ahh, the P Man and Moppie show.
Very humorous, P Man, even if they are at the expense of us poor, mistreated males (boo hoo).
Very humorous, P Man, even if they are at the expense of us poor, mistreated males (boo hoo).
primera man
05-23-2002, 05:20 AM
Originally posted by Moppie
She letting you sleep at the foot of the bed with the dog, instead of on the couch with the cat huh?
:p :p
WOMEN....Ya cant trust them....look what she put in my sig when i wasnt here :(
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board
while I sit on the sofa and fart.
She letting you sleep at the foot of the bed with the dog, instead of on the couch with the cat huh?
:p :p
WOMEN....Ya cant trust them....look what she put in my sig when i wasnt here :(
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said - That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board
while I sit on the sofa and fart.
Moppie
05-23-2002, 05:22 AM
Originally posted by primera man
WOMEN....Ya cant trust them....look what she put in my sig when i wasnt here [/B]
LOL!
Sounds like you went to get another beer and got shafted!
That my Friend makes you DOUBLE WHIPPED!!!
looks like your back on the couch then. (after your 2mins work of course ;) )
WOMEN....Ya cant trust them....look what she put in my sig when i wasnt here [/B]
LOL!
Sounds like you went to get another beer and got shafted!
That my Friend makes you DOUBLE WHIPPED!!!
looks like your back on the couch then. (after your 2mins work of course ;) )
primera man
05-23-2002, 05:27 AM
Originally posted by Moppie
LOL!
Sounds like you went to get another beer and got shafted!
That my Friend makes you DOUBLE WHIPPED!!!
looks like your back on the couch then. (after your 2mins work of course ;) )
2mins......you show-off
:eek:
LOL!
Sounds like you went to get another beer and got shafted!
That my Friend makes you DOUBLE WHIPPED!!!
looks like your back on the couch then. (after your 2mins work of course ;) )
2mins......you show-off
:eek:
Moppie
05-23-2002, 05:43 AM
Well what can I say, :o
I practice when I can..... :p :smoker2:
I practice when I can..... :p :smoker2:
ragt20
05-23-2002, 07:43 AM
:lol2: nice
just make us poor guys suffer more at the hands of the women:rolleyes:
just make us poor guys suffer more at the hands of the women:rolleyes:
Shaitan
05-23-2002, 02:53 PM
REALLY FUNNY!!:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:
Spec2 Girl
05-23-2002, 04:21 PM
Hahahahaha :hehehe: :hehehe:
:D :D :D :D :D :D
:D :D :D :D :D :D
speediva
05-23-2002, 10:45 PM
I love them! Thanks PLady!
primera man
05-24-2002, 01:18 AM
Originally posted by saturntangerine
I love them! Thanks PLady!
Im going to have to have a weeee talk with that wife of mine....i see she has posted a few others here in my name too :eek: :eek:
I love them! Thanks PLady!
Im going to have to have a weeee talk with that wife of mine....i see she has posted a few others here in my name too :eek: :eek:
speediva
05-25-2002, 01:07 AM
Originally posted by primera man
Im going to have to have a weeee talk with that wife of mine....i see she has posted a few others here in my name too :eek: :eek:
She needs to get herself back in MY forum! ;) Then we can post as many of these as we want, and all w/o you ever knowing!!! :D
Im going to have to have a weeee talk with that wife of mine....i see she has posted a few others here in my name too :eek: :eek:
She needs to get herself back in MY forum! ;) Then we can post as many of these as we want, and all w/o you ever knowing!!! :D
primera man
05-25-2002, 05:30 AM
Originally posted by saturntangerine
She needs to get herself back in MY forum! ;) Then we can post as many of these as we want, and all w/o you ever knowing!!! :D
I've banned her :D :D
She needs to get herself back in MY forum! ;) Then we can post as many of these as we want, and all w/o you ever knowing!!! :D
I've banned her :D :D
JD@af
05-25-2002, 11:45 AM
Originally posted by primera man
I've banned her :D :D :eek: :eek: :eek: WHAT!?!? You've banned your own WIFE?!?! ...Looks like sombody's gonna be sleeping on the couch for a while :silly2: :silly2: :silly2:
I've banned her :D :D :eek: :eek: :eek: WHAT!?!? You've banned your own WIFE?!?! ...Looks like sombody's gonna be sleeping on the couch for a while :silly2: :silly2: :silly2:
speediva
05-26-2002, 03:19 AM
Originally posted by JD@af
:eek: :eek: :eek: WHAT!?!? You've banned your own WIFE?!?! ...Looks like sombody's gonna be sleeping on the couch for a while :silly2: :silly2: :silly2:
And what if I un-ban her???
(besides, I don't think you're the first to ban your wifey)
:eek: :eek: :eek: WHAT!?!? You've banned your own WIFE?!?! ...Looks like sombody's gonna be sleeping on the couch for a while :silly2: :silly2: :silly2:
And what if I un-ban her???
(besides, I don't think you're the first to ban your wifey)
tazdev
05-26-2002, 03:24 AM
Originally posted by saturntangerine
And what if I un-ban her???
(besides, I don't think you're the first to ban your wifey)
I doubt he will be the last one either:frog:
And what if I un-ban her???
(besides, I don't think you're the first to ban your wifey)
I doubt he will be the last one either:frog:
speediva
05-26-2002, 03:36 AM
I may be the first one to ban a husband, though!!! :eek:
tazdev
05-26-2002, 03:42 AM
hmmm. Sensing a hidden meaning there.:confused:
Yeah I can't see Spec2 banning Moondog (yet):flipa:
Yeah I can't see Spec2 banning Moondog (yet):flipa:
Spec2 Girl
05-26-2002, 04:45 PM
Originally posted by tazdev
Yeah I can't see Spec2 banning Moondog (yet):flipa: I like the emphasis on yet! :devil:
:p
j/k :)
Yeah I can't see Spec2 banning Moondog (yet):flipa: I like the emphasis on yet! :devil:
:p
j/k :)
taranaki
05-30-2002, 07:30 AM
My wife got banned by Spec2:eek:
Spec2 Girl
05-30-2002, 05:09 PM
Originally posted by taranaki
My wife got banned by Spec2:eek: How did I know I’d live to regret that one? I knew I should have made you do it yourself.
My wife got banned by Spec2:eek: How did I know I’d live to regret that one? I knew I should have made you do it yourself.
taranaki
05-30-2002, 05:28 PM
O.K. I admit it,I asked Spec2 to ban her for me.I deserve to be:biggrin2: by Spec2,and:stormzap:by DQ .I was:confused: at the time and I am still a bit :bloated: .
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