Why did the J-walker cross the road?

to get hit by my car!

it was right after school, and in a school zone naturally, so i wasnt going fast, but she just bolted out in front of me from behind a car, so i hit the brakes.. they did nothing, so i helplessly slid into her and she went spinning to the ground beside my car, clearing some ice from my bumper. naturally i first think, "oh shit! my car!" then second, "i wonder if she's ok." no damage to either side tho, i guess people absorb bumpers pretty well. so i pull over and laugh my ass off after making sure the dumb bitch was ok. anyway, there should be a sign up saying

No J-Walking
Violators will get knocked the fuck out


it was pretty impressive how instead of taking a step to the side to get out of the way, which she could (and should) have easily done, she braced for impact and took it like a champ.

i guess some people just dont use the "look both ways" trick.

damn man thats pretty fuckin funny. I saw someone get hit by a car before and they got fucked up. I had to go to court and testify for them.

lol i hit some dumb ass stoned kid last winter with my fullsized truck, so stoned he got up and just walked away, wouldnt let me call the cops and tell them lol... but on a side note, its excellent that your car didnt get any damage

haha....i like the check the car first...i would have done the same...lol

... the person was the dumbass to walk in front of you, hell yeah the cars first, damn kids

lol, im one of the damn kids, but im not stupid enough to get hit by a fuckin car, especially in a school zone! the cars are going slow!

it was just so amazing cuz she was just goin top speed into my path, there was no hesitating, she wanted to find out what my bumper feels like at about 30 km/h.

the question is: would i do it again? ..yes. i suggest if you get the opportunity to hit a dumbass (not too hard) with your car, to go for it. it could easily be a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

my only regret is not having it on tape somehow, i would have loved to see her face, and she fell in a funny way too cuz i got her with the corner of my bumper, giving me a great view.

but honestly, im glad she's not hurt. even though shes an idiot, she cant help it. if i hurt a poor, defenceless idiot, i would feel guilty.

Was she hot?

hahaha, no. she was short and kinda on the big side, not real fat or anything, but also she was kinda weird.

if she was hot it woulda been a different story and i wouldnt have gave a shit about my car.. well at least not so much, hah.

hot girls tend to be the ones not getting hit by cars.

Ah damn. If she was hot I woulda been like "Ah shit sorry, I'll take you to eat sometime to make up for it," then take it from there. :P

lol, no doubt man. hitting a girl with your car is like a pickup line. hahahah

The best thing I read all day!

Was she hot?
a hot chick walking? where are you from? here all the hot ones either have a car, have boyfriends with cars or have friends with cars, walking is like a fashion no no :nono:

See theres a problem with hitting some people with your car. People like me leave big dents when we get hit by cars

Of course by people like me I mean fattys....

LOL i didnt get any dents but i did get a broken headlight :(....skinnyer people leave the worst dents, less serfice area of hip bone to hood

hahaha, no. she was short and kinda on the big side.

Why did the J-walker cross the road?

because the ice cream truck was on the other side

lol, i think she was bootin it to the bus to be honest, but yea, i was honestly expecting my car to have gotten something for damage, i think i got a tiny little chip in my hood, but that could have been from before.

o well, it made my day, haha.