Difficulty

I have been having a problem lately, and I thought I'd throw it out there and see if I can get any helpful feedback.
Lately, I've been unable to take a satisfying crap. actually, it's been over a week since I did. Oh, I get the urge alright, very strongly. I run to the bathroom, sit on the can, and the best I can get out is some gas bubbles. Or maybe just the tip of a nasty, sticky stool (like the tip of an iceberg). The rest never comes out, and its a real bugger trying to wipe that mess out of there. I always end up with a case of the "creamy butt", which is MOST uncomfortable.
I was just wondering if anyone is or has been similarly afflicted, and if so, any suggestions?

wtf mate

what have you been eating/drinking? Been pissed a lot latley? That shit sends me out of business for at least 2 days!

Try eating some veggies, fruit and meat, steer clear of crap food like take-away, incl. pizza's.

I dunno if that'll help.

You should really see a doctor if it's this bad. Man, your farts must clear a funeral home out!

Actually I am usually pissed... and I tend to live on salami...I may have to try your advice.

god that was a bit too detailed... take a fiber supplement or a laxitive.

maybe u have tapeworms....

Ithink you will find that this thread is a hoax.