REALLY bad jokes!!

The Bar Basement

Three men walk into a bar and the barman says, ''If you can sit in my basement for a day I'll give you free beer forever.''
So the first man says, ''Easy. I can do that.''

But he walks out after five minutes and says, ''It's impossible, you got a swarm of flies in there.''

So the second man tries his luck, but can't take more than 10 minutes. Finally the third man goes in and comes out a day later. The others ask him how he did it.

He said, ''Easy. I took a dump in one corner and sat in the other corner!''



Grandma & Grandpa

Grandma & Grandpa are sitting on the porch, when all of a sudden Grandma slaps Grandpa.
"That's for 50 years of the worst sex I've ever had."

They're both silent for ten minutes. Then Grandpa slaps Grandma.

"That's for knowin' the difference."




Fridays in Hell

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. Walking around, he runs into the devil.
Devil: Why are you so sad?
Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.
Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Diet Tab. We drink until we throw up and then we drink some more.
Guy: Gee, that sounds great.
Devil: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it.
Devil: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our friggin' lungs out. If you get cancer, it's okay -- you're already dead.
Guy: Golly!
Devil: I bet you like to gamble, too.
Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Devil: Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it. You like to do drugs?
Guy: Yes, I love to do drugs. You don't mean...?
Devil: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a doobie the size of the Titanic. You can do all the drugs you want, and you'll never die -- you're already dead.
Guy: Neat! I never realized hell was such a happenin' place!
Devil: You gay?
Guy: No.
Devil: Oh, you're gonna hate Fridays.

:disappoin :rolleyes: :loser: :uhoh:

Good ones. I like the second one the best

I also liked the second one the best.

I like the first one. Whats with the second one? Grandma having a reaction time of 50 years while grandpa has 10 minutes?