true insurance tales

Collection By The Norwich Union Insurance Company.

"I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought."

"A car drove away at speed catching our client who went up in the air and his head went through the windscreen and then rolled off at the traffic lights a good few feet away. The car then sped off and miraculously our client remained conscious and managed to cross the road."

"I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the bonnet. I realised the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with a blanket."

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident?
A: Travelled by bus?

A Norwich Union customer collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were:
Q - What warning was given by you?
A - Horn
Q - What warning was given by the other party?
A - Moo

"I had one eye on a parked car, another on approaching lorries, and
another on the woman behind."

"I started to turn and it was at this point I noticed a camel and an
elephant together at the verge. This distraction caused me to lose
concentration and hit a bollard."

"On the M6 I moved from the centre lane to the fast lane but the other car didn't give way."

"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke."

"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight."

"No witnesses would admit having seen the mishap until after it happened."

"First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran
into the rear of the second car. Windscreen broken. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo."

"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again.":eek:

"We had completed the turn and had just straightened the car when Miss X put her foot down hard and headed for the ladies' loo."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."

"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I
reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did
not see the other car."

"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal
joint gave way causing me to have an accident." "To avoid hitting the
bumper of the car in front I struck the pedestrian."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."

:D "Moo" :D

"First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran
into the rear of the second car. Windscreen broken. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo."

Rofl! Now thats funny, I know someone who would say that :D :p