Tried to see my dad in LA this weekend (long)

This is just me venting so take it as you may.

Ok, so my dad tells me that he want's me to go out to LA to go to this fundraiser where he is donating money to breast cancer research. He said that he'd also like to spend some time with me. So after hemming and hawing and arguing ab how there are other places that I'd rather go, I give in and go. So he says to me "I'll be there to pick you up at the airport, promise" and I said ok. Well anyways, I get on the plane, and I sit there for almost 7 hours and we land and all is well and good. So I get off the plane and get to the baggage claim and I see a man standing with the rest of the limo drivers holding my name. I was like "WTF? my dad said he'd be here." well glen (the drivers name) tells me that my dad had a business meeting to go to so glen was sent to pick me up. Ok. one disappointment. NOw you have to understand, my emotional state at this point was pretty shitty because of the things that i have been going through. (Look under the depression thread) So i'm like whatever, I'll get my bags, you get the car and then we'll leave. Ok, so anyways. We get in the car and deal with that damn airport, I really hate lax, and then we're on the road to my dad's house. I was pretty pissed and i was like "lets just drive around." and he was like "whatever youw ant to do miss" So we drive. I made a few phone calls, changed my clothes, fixed my hair and then I decided that I was hungry. So we stopped to get something to eat and then finally we go to my dad's. Getting there wasn't the most plesant experience. Lets just say that he barely said 2 words to me when i walked in the door. My little brother ran down the steps and jumped on me to give me a hug. I went around the house looking for my dad but he was more involved in the damn computer to even look up at me and say "did you have a nice flight? I've missed you." I havent seen him in more than 4 months. Don't you think he'd have more to say then "Kate I'm busy right now can you please just go get something to eat?" Now, I know that he is a busy man, but please, why am i the one that is ignored. Ok, so whatever. I do my own thing, go to sleep, wake up, its Friday morning. Now I had to go get a dress to wear and shoes and get my hair done and all. Ok, so Glen comes to pick me up to take me shopping and we go and blah blah. I find a dress and then he calls me. "Do you want to have lunch with me? We can go where ever you want." And I was like "ok, that'd be nice, i missed you" so we agree to meet for lunch at this little place at i think it was like 1 or something. Well anyways, right as we were on our way (me and glen) I get a call from him saying that he has to go to lunch with these people from work and that he'll have to cancel with me. So needless to say, i'm pretty upset becuase he said that we'd spend time together while I was out there. So I'm beyond pissed at this point and me and Glen sit down to have lunch. Ok, so we're done we go get shoes, and a bag, and then we picked up my brother from school, and we hung out and then I got my hair done and then I went back to dad's house to finish getting ready for this thing that I didnt want to go to in the first place. So I'm almost all ready and my dad calls up to me "Me and Stacy are leaving. Glen is driving you tonight. We'll see you there." and they leave. and I'm like wtf? why arent i going with them? I always go in the same car as him. why a different car? anyways. About 10 minutes later, the doorbell rings and in walks this guy. And by this point i'm just ab ready, all i need to do is slip a ring on and my shoes. i come out of my room and look down and I was like "hi who are you?" and he was like "Hi, I'm Josh. I'm your escort for the night." and i was like WTF?!?! an escort? so i asked him "you work for my dad don't you." and he was like "yeah why" and i was like "how much did he pay you to take me?" and he told me and I was like "there is no reason for you to be taking me, I am not going to this thing with someone I don't know and I'm sorry but I dont want to get to know right now. and he looked at me with a confused look and I was like "I'll have someone take you home" and he was like "if that's what you want" ok so I get to the fundraiser and I"m talking, mingling and my dad is completely ignoring me. ok so i present the check and I'm leaving. So i go back to my dad's house and get undressed and all that stuff and just hung out and then around 2 or so, I went to sleep. So I wake up on Saturday, and I'm completely ignored. He doesnt talk to me, say a thing. Ask me to do something NOTHING! The most i got out of him was "pass the comics". So Saturday night, I was just so fed up with him, I left. Took a car and went up the 101. Just drove and drove. Ended up in a nice place, Santa Rosa anyone? Well anyways. I ended up driving back yesterday night and when I got back, he was like "i'm sorry, here's a new computer to make it all up to you" and i looked at him with a confused face and was like "thanks, I think" and I went up to my room. He still didn't say anything to me. Anyways, I left early this morning (monday) not like he could take me to the airport or say bye to me or anything right? oh well, what can ya do? My mom doesnt like me, my dad might as well be the same right? (they are divorced...but that's another thread) Sometimes I wonder why I bother to be nice to my family. Its not like they're nice to me....ugh.


Sorry about this, I needed to tell someone.

Sorry to hear kate. I wish I could say I understand and know how you feel and try to relate but i can't. That as far as having divorced parents. But my mom HATES me and anyone I try to date. I just usually blow her off and take do what dad says. Venting is better then holding things in and letting build up and get worse. Perhaps you could tell your dad how you feel etc by an email or phone call. But feel free to vent after all thats what "friends" are for. PM, IM, or email if ya ever wanna talk.

ouch. sorry to butt in but f***. i under stand the divorced parents and the being ignored. but i learned long ago that if you always make yourself avalible then you get taking for granted. all i can really say is keep your head up it will get better. and smile it makes people wonder what your up to. :)

Part of growing up is coping with the fact that our parents are just people......if we try and win their favour/approval we risk being disappointed. We have to make our own way and, in a way, insulate ourselves from disappointment.
As for your dad, the world is full of successful people (your dad sounds like one) who have had to decide between career and family. It's an old story; the successful people often realise all too late that their children have grown and they have missed the opportunity to be with them.
I am sure your father knows this; he just does not regret is decision enough yet.

I'm sorry. Being ignored and/or disliked by family would be horrible. I can only imagine how you feel. I don't see how you don't say anything to him, I don't think I would be able to hold my feelings back. I also have to agree with MagicRat. He will realize all too late.

My parents arent divorced, but I do know what its like to be ignored, well you know my family situation. kate you dont deserve to have that happen to you, you are to kind and way to caring to be treated like that. What he did was wrong. He should be treating you like the princess you are, if he promised to be there he should have been there. If you want to talk about it, Im here and Ill listen. :smooch:
BTW tell him next time he feels you need an escort to call me, he doesnt have to pay me to spend time with you, spending time with you is something i want to do :smooch:

You drove all the way to Santa Rosa??? If you had gone 15 more miles, you would have hit my town, Healdsburg..

I'm sorry about you not getting along with your father. He sounds like the rich/busy father type who rarely has time for anyone else. Maybe he is too sucked into his job and is so use to being a workaholic that he just doesn't see it as an issue. I'm sure he loves being with you and wanted to talk but he just sounds waaay too busy with work.

Btw, I'm glad you could see beautiful Sonoma County and I hope you can come back sometime.

Part of the reason I was so upset by this was because he usually doesn't treat me like this. Usually its like "drop everything and spend time with my only daughter" I think in some cases, I was a bit selfish, but I'm not sure that it was too much to ask if he came to get me or actually spend time with me while I went over to see him. My mom and I don't get along, we never have. She kicked me out of her house 3 times before the last. I havent spoken to her in i think 2 years. While that's not something to be proud of, she hasnt tried to call me either. She talks and see's my older brothers (i have 3) but when ever they try to bring up my name, they say that she just changes the conversation. .... back on topic...My dad apologized and all so I shouldn't be mad at him but I don't know, I just don't think he should have blown me off like he did. Thanks Adam for the offer, I might have to take you up on it.
96civ: Yeah, Santa Rosa. I'll probably be back again, I enjoyed the ride quite a bit
TexasF355F1 I'm the kind of person who will hold their feelings in and not share them. I did talk with him about what happened but I only got more upset and then I left. I'm not good at talking about/sharing my feelings so I just keep most everything inside.


Thank you everyone for your comments, I really do appreciate them. At least I know someone reads when I vent.

just give me enough time to get a flight and ill go anywhere with you. I always listen when you vent :smooch: