After 2 Years She totally Shattered me

This is probly way lame for me to post this or even talk about it but Im really freaking out and I need to vent so here it goes.

Im now 17 will be 18 in 10 days, and anyway she is 16 and we have been together since I was a sphmore and so I dont know how to say this but I LOVE HER I would do anything for her, I mean anything and she has always loved me and I trusted her but anyway so We broke up 2 weeks ago we totally still kissed and stuff but We werent "together" so last night I really couldnt take it so I went over to talk to her and I let it all out (probly big mistake) but what can I say Im a naive guy who thinks if I give up all my heart things will turn out right, so I talk to her in my truck and we discuss things and I tell her how I could never replace her and how She is so important to me and how I want to work things out and I love her and I can see being with her in the future and stuff and she totally goes along with it and tells me how she feels the same way and so anyway. I go home and page her around 11 pm and she doesnt call back so I figure she's sleeping (again Im naive) so I fall asleep with the phone in my hand and wake up still no sign of her or anything, SO i go over to where she is staying and shes nowhere to be found and, I page her tons but no response, I page her with my buddys number and guess what, she calls back so anyway She is calling on this guys phone and when she finds out its me shes all like "I cant talk right now Im on his phone ill call you in five minutes" so I tell her I need to talk with her and she tells me shell call me back. She didnt, I waited half an hour and no call, so Im chillin here and her notepad is sitting on the counter in front of me and so I take a peek. I know Im a scumball but I felt it was justified. I found this letter she wrote to me but wasnt going to give it to me that says how the "spark" has left and she doesnt get butterflies with me anymore and how she loves me but the way this guy (whose cellphone she called from) the way he kisses her and touches her makes her feel butterflies and she is all into it. I am devastated this sounds gay to all the guys here but I have cried practically all day long I think Im having a nervous breakdown, I feel like just going balls out without my seatbelt and rolling my truck like at 80. After I found the note I headed home and I was so trippin I ran a redlight and didnt even know, I just saw this guy in a jeep coming into the intersection from the left and I was going "what the hell is he doing?" then I looked up as I passed underneath a redlight, I didnt even care I drove home parked my car and broke down in my room. I feel like Im acting lame but I feel so hurt and I dont know what to do but cry. my dad told me to grow up when he saw me. I feel so lame in so many ways, It woulndt be a big deal if she wouldnt have been so into me and told me that she loved me and she would never be interested in anyone else, I so have had the chance to have sex with other girls but I didnt because I loved her so much, I feel so broken, She took my virginity and I gave her my heart, I sou ndnd so gay right now but I dont care, I hte myself and I hate living I hate my face and I hate my body and I hate my car actually there isnt anything I dont rteally hate right now, I really dont trust anyone, Im so confused and so lost in my own head, I keep seeing me having sex with her in my head only instead of me its this other guy with her and shes saying his name and doing all the things htat we did together. I feel like an idiot Ne way

Sorry for bothering anybody I just need to vent, I need to talk to someone so I figured Id just post, It helpd a bit.
Gimme some advice. Or PM me and if your a girl tell me whats going on in her head and why she did this to me.

Thanks, Ohh I attached a picture of me in the grey and her on new years shes wearing red and sitting on my lap in the front row were all a little tipsy :( :( :(
heres the pic link
http://files.automotiveforums.com/uploads/671848newyears.jpg

smoke some reefah :bonghitte :bonghitte :smoka:

that makes me happy no matter what mood i'm in :)

Dude, you’re going through what every other male has endured. Sorry to say that its not an easy thing. Do your best not to be stuck on this chick since you are still damn young and don’t need to be wasting your time dwelling on it. This shit will work itself out in the end.













Never pay again for live sex! (http://showmewebcam.com/?p=1) | Hot girls doing naughty stuff for free! (http://showmewebcam.com/?p=3) | Chat for free! (http://showmewebcam.com/?p=5)

MODERATORS!!!!!!!!

This thread needs to be merged with the identically titled one in Coffee Break Completely Off-Topic.

You guys (and girls) all rock I really appriciate all your advice, It helps :D I feel better slightly, Im not in any immidiate danger of killing myself, thank god I would regret it, its not so much that I want another girl, its just I dunno, I just maybe need to get over her and try to cope. I dont know. I think its really probly a big hit to my self esteem, thats probly half the reason I feel like shit, I mean after her telling me all these things and her leaving I blame myself Physically, No not like that either ,:) but I look in the mirror and pick myself to pieces. she told me she wants to get back with me maybe after highschool, I see this as basically her wanting to sleep around and then come back to me. so I dunno I cant "be" with her, My girl friends tell me I shouldnt talk to her for like 2 weeks and it will be easier, Sleeping with her will probly make things harder also, Id probly feel like shit too. I guess sex with her now is just a way for me to feel wanted, in the moment she needs me and she says all the things I want to hear but when its over things take a crap. hehee So I probly shouldnt sleep with her. My birthday is in 10 days and I dont know what to do she wants to come to my birthday party to be around me but I dont know. homecomeing is in 2 weeks and I lost my girl. Its like I had my eggs in one basket and my basket broke and my eggs fell out. hehe I dont Know,

After all this I thank you all for all your advice you all helped me though probly the hardest emotional time in my life. I dont want to look for a girl to replace her cause I know It wouldnt be right I just need to live life and hopefully Ill meet another girl and we will CLICK and things will go right.

I took this pic today
Im the ugly guy in the front with the grey gap shirt on
www.qf.org/4run/buddies.jpg

But at least I can smile

How do I merge the thread wioth its identical one in completely off topic?

Don't blame yourself. If she's the one that wanted to break things off, then that is HER loss. As for getting back together after high school...don't plan on it, because by then you will have your life planned out as far as where you want to go to college, what you want to do with your life, etc...and maybe even have someone else who makes you happier :) Start making YOUR OWN plans now, and don't let her interfere. And don't sleep with her if you know she's already sleeping around....that only keeps the emotional wounds open. Your birthday is coming up...celebrate with your true friends and go out and have your own good time. As for homecoming, maybe you can take one of your good female friends for company if that event is an important one to you. The worst thing you can do for yourself is to sit an analyze everything and look for things you did wrong. We all make mistakes and we must learn from them. But you also need to look at the good points and make the best of them. Judging by the pic you put up, looks like you have a nice group of friends, which is always a very good thing to have when going thru a tough time. Hang in there, things do get better. We all go thru stuff like this in life.

Kat hit the nail on the head.

Keeping the physical nature of your relationship open will only keep your wounds open. Steer clear of her for a while. You are a genuine, caring individual with your own needs separate of anyone else. Take care of yourself and surround yourself with people you honestly trust. It won't be magic where you'll wake up mystically healed, but if you pay attention to you for now, you'll begin to notice how you will be able to see the next day as always brighter than the day before.

Good to hear that you're on the right track so far!

I feel so bad for you. Not because your girlfriend broke up with you , but because this is your first (of many) heart brakes.

Remeber that time heals all. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you will feel better in time. Since she meant so much to you, she will be with you always. Just not the way you thought.

This makes room for adventures that you haven't even imagined yet. Plan a Spring vacation trip. Grab a buddy and do somthing crazy (bur safe).

Try to relax and just feel the pain now, and know it will leave. It ALWAYS does eventually.

Good Luck- If you need some ideas about fun places to go, just ask.

Brianna

after i break up with girls i usually forget about them within a week :)

it aint a big deal, there are tons more and if she was doin this to you, she isn't right for you any way.

Just go to the next party, have a good time and find a new chick. That always makes me happy :D